HIV in nursery

[worriedperson]

AIBU to worry about this?
The guides I have read all say there is no risk of infection as long as proper hygiene procedures are carried out.
However, the staff, although good in other ways, are not that hygiene-conscious, for example, they send children home in wet pants, having not noticed they have had an accident.
Is there any real risk of catching it?
Also, what if one child bites another?

So ladybiscuit, if OP had googled and found out, becasue there is loads of shit on the internet that hiv can be passed on by kissing, being gay, whatever. And then she'd have come on mn nad said Im awfully sorry I really am not sure can anyone clarify? What do you think the reaction would be?
It is perfectly respectable to be ignorant, everyone is ignorant about something at some point in their lives, as long as you learn its fine.

Well yes it's very dim to read any old thing online rather than relying on reliable sources like the NHS. And I'm particularly sad that the OP is relying on gossip and I think it's appalling that it's even going round the nursery frankly.

And yes, my position as a good friend as someone with HIV influences my opinion. But it is hardly 'clouding my judgement'. My judgement is entirely based on educating myself and is not clouded, but enhanced by having been lucky enough to have Robert in my life for as long as he has been :)

Actually I would be a whole lot less annoyed if this had been posted in health rather than AIBU. It's all a bit Daily Fail

i didn't say it was clouding your judgement. isaid it was clouding your opinion of this. meaning your reaction to this OP was more severe as a result of your friendship.

Weegiemum - that was me I think! You are obviously well aware of the high risk groups and behaviours and know that your risk of infection is less than miniscule. I have a number of friends who have gone through marriage break ups in recent years and are dating again or embarking on new relationships. 2 of them are pregnant by new partners, all parties have children by previous relationships. I just wonder how many of them are in denial about the risk of HIV - I'm not 100% convinced that everyone has a full sexual health MOT before sleeping with a new partner ?

did i miss the bit where she said she was relying on gossip?

according to you she should have googled it first, so she is supposed to know what is the right thing to read. A person asking questions is not dim..you are the ignorant one if youre asking me. And you did not answer what I said befoer, is it not good that when questions are raised they are answered and therefore raising awareness?

The OP struck me as ignorant. Clearly you didn't think it was. Difference of opinion

And the gossip is the bit where the OP said: 'apparently there is a child with HIVT in nursery. I know parents should not be told, but things do get out.'

That's gossip isn't it? What would you call it?

The whole reason people ask questions on MN instead of (or as well as) googling is that the opinions of our peers are valued much more highly than dry information from 'official' sources - that's why forums are such a good source of information, advice and support.

Let's face it, you could read the NHS info on vax and then come on here and find a whole different set of opinions, advice and information which you would never access if you didn't ask about it.

OP read the official info, still felt worried, wasn't exactly sure why, and came on here to get some opinions from her peers.

Fair enough.

when questions are not answered i always conclude that that person knows they are wrong so hopefully something has been learnt.

ignorance isn't a crime. and actually surely the fact that she actually asked tells you that she wants to know? she is adressing her ignorance by writing this OP and yet you still harp on about her ignorance.

I think my POV seems to be the majority opinion on this thread so I leave you to draw your own conclusions. Good night :)

good night

i don't need agreement from the masses to let me know what i think is right. i am capable of forming an opinion regardless of whether it tallies with what others think.

good night.

and good ridddance hee hee

not you booyhoo!

Hang on a minute - if Mumsnet isn't somewhere where you can come and ask a question, then surely someone should tell all the people asking questions about pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, weaning, potty training, sleep, starting nursery, starting school, primary school, secondary school - the list goes on and on!

Ladybiscuit - there is no rule here saying that you can only ask a question if you have Googled it first, so I think your attitude towards the OP is unneccessarily dictatorial and unpleasant.

Thank you to everyone who has posted info and links. I have learnt a lot and been reassured.

I did google for information about HIV; what I found was a lot of sources saying 'as long as proper precautions are in place' etc. I didn't know if the laxness of hygiene at nursery made the situation more of a risk.

They have been sometimes challenged over a child left wet, and they say they had not noticed. Once it was mine. I can hardly say 'Yes you did but you didn't bother." can I. It might be true, maybe they don't notice, especially when they are playing outside.
The children seem to have a happy time there.

Thank you to those who think it reasonable to name change. I don't want this child to be identified. Obvious I would have thought. I can't out the nursery without outing the child.
I never described the child or the mother, other posters did that!

If I should have posted in health, well, I'm sorry. I didn't think of it before. I won't do it again.
And thanks again to the many posters who answered my question.

Good grief.

Do any of you actually know how it feels to live with a BBV ( thats a blood borne virus). The fear of filling out any kind of form at work, the dentists, even the GPs as mnay know very little.

I do. I know how it feels.

I have dealt with the secrecy, the fear and the dark shadow of it hanging over me for 13 years of my life. And I am quite open about it, unlike a lot of others, and who can blame them when you see this thread.

I have had numerous dates/boyfriends find out and leave even mid date and mine isn't easy to catch sexually - actually its very very difficult to.

I was at a dinner party recently while I was on treatment and was being cajoled into having an alcoholic drink which I did not want to have because of the meds and ended up saying I was on treatment for Hep C and she said in front of 7 other guests "How did you get that" a) Who cares - did I deserve to get it is it was my own "fault" b) What business is it of anyones?.

This thread has made me very sad.

ladyanonymous. what is it about the thread that makes you sad?

Weegie- tbh wouldn't you say you do know your HIV status? It does sound like it.

I mean, dh was a virgin and has only ever slept with me; like you no drugs, transfusions etc- his was never in doubt in my mind. But most of us have had a few partners or whatever, and so our chances of carrying HIV rise and therefore it's wise to know. IMHO.

Am no angel or at least I didn't use to be. But I would want to have known if ther had been any chance of passing HIV to my DH or my children, becuase prompt meds mean everything with HIV.

if I thought there was the tiniest chance I could have HIV then I would have been tested - but there isn't a chance, unless it moves through the air!

I have 2 friends with it though - hard to live with , but better living with it that dying of it, which was the prognosis in teh '80s when both were diagnosed.

I'm just very lucky - I don't have a spotted past (met dh when I was 18, he was 19, both had bought into the "good Christian" message on sex up till then!!). Went failry swiftly beyond being good with dh, but we have been together now 21 years and no-one else, so I don't feel a need for medical confirmation of my status!!