Hubby forgot our anniversary :(

[Dolanette]

Hubby forgot it was our anniversary (7yr).I had to (not so gently) remind him when he began talking about a lads night out! He then booked dinner at a lovely restaurant (v posh 5)but I was so cross told him to cancel. We've agreed now to go to another restaurant (not posh!).Would prefer to keep 5 for a very special occasion and not when i'm getting over this. :-( He can't understand why I was so angry over it!! AIBU to be angry over it? I think I'm not!!

Ouch YANBU but at the end of the day hes a bloke

i think they are just a bit rubbish at remembering dates sometimes. doesnt mean they dont love us or want to be with us. i would feel v v hurt too- so i make sure something is put in hte diary a long time in advance and keep on mentioning it so we dont get this taking place. easy to see why you are hurting but do be gentle on him. he would be devastated to know he hurt you. i do find some men just do forget. yanbu but better for you both to extend him some love and ask for any favour you like- bet you'll get it tonight!

Isn't this an episode of Terry & June?.....

Do what everyone else does. Flag up important events well in advance rather than expecting some dope of a bloke to remember. If you want a fuss made, make this clear at the time. e.g. Pick your Christmas present now and e-mail him a link to it together with a reminder that it's 25th December.

LadyA - what a ridiculous thing to say.

YABU - he booked a very nice place, probably to make up for forgetting, and then you rejected it.

it depends if you have mentioned it before now. i have to tell my dh 2 months before, then 1 month, then 2 weeks then a few days etc if i want him to actually organise anything for an annerversary or birthday. otherewise i'm organising myself!

although he did book a posh restaruant once you had reminded him, it could have been worse. just think if he had shrugged his sholders and continued planning a boys night out!

coventgarden Why is it ridiculous? Men do not place the same amount of importance of these things as women do. Fact.

DH and I both forgot our 5th anniversary, not the date itself but the fact it was the Thursday of that particular week - it's easily done. So long as you know he loves you, that's the important thing. Some people show it with dates and others with a cup of tea in the morning - it's probably in the index of every Men are from Mars type book

I can't understand why you're so angry either tbh. I truly don't see the big deal about wedding anniversaries. It's not even as if it's a big one like 25 years or whatever.

Think you need to chill out really.

chil that is so true, its my birthday in august and i want dh to make a fuss of it so i wrote a list entitled 'ideas to make my georgous sexy wife's birthday amazing' and left it in his work bag - hes taken the 'hint' and is organising things!

Thanks for the replies, I had reminded him recently!! And I don't think I was unreasonable to refuse 5* ... Can you imagine spending a fortune on a dinner when you're just getting over a row. Best keep that one for another time.

Oh blimey - I nearly forgot that ours is next week, but luckily my Outlook calendar has just reminded me - phew!

TBH, dinner at a 5* restaurant sounds like the perfect way to get over a row to me!

Callisto Anniversaries do mean a lot to me.

But why are you so upset about it?? It might just be me, but I would rather have a forgetful , loving husband to the alternative ...

No YANBU.
If it's any consolation I woke to find DH cleaning the oven on our 11th anniversary! I'd hoped for a romantic breakfast or something. But maybe I'm expecting too much given that we have baby.

A couple of years ago I loaded our anniversary onto my husband's Outlook calendar with a reminder that goes off one week beforehand in perpetuity. Otherwise we would still be having those annual conversations about whether it is really the 26th or 28th because he can never remember which. I don't expect a fuss, but I like it if we acknowledge it.

I would also go with the 5* dinner, but then I am a greedy pig and the way to my heart is through my stomach.

What, LadyA, every man?

I don't think so. Fact.

Sounds like you're cutting off your nose on this one - take the 5*'s and enjoy!

And worryworry that sounds like an amazing anniversary present to me!!!

Well it did bother me, so I let him know. He wasn't that apologetic about it at the time. More why is it bothering you so much!!

I know things could be way worse but to forget it AND be planning a night out for himself. That was a bit too much for me.

I have just booked a restaurant for dinner for our forthcoming anniversary now!

Thanks for the reminder!

Me and my partner don't even remember the exact date of our anniversary! Just know that it's 7years mid-August-ish. We don't place much importance on it, I'd rather be lovely to eachother spontaniously rather when society dictates is the appropriate day of the year tbh...it has mmore meaning that way.

But I do think making him cancel the 5* dinner was a bit ott - he cocked up, appologised and more than made it up to you. What's the problem?
Love what Itsjustafleshwound said - very true. Think some perspective is in order

X-Post with you saying about him not being appologetic. Some people just don't put much importance on it as others, he did make an effort once he realised it was such a big deal for you though.

Worryworry - if I awoke to dp cleaning the oven I'd think all our aniversaries had come at once!!

Surely an anniversary is a joint celebration. You plan the celebration together,in advance, to get what you both want.

YABU.

He forgot.It happens.

He then booked a nice resturant and you told him to cancel because you were cross he forgot?

He can't win really can he?

I'll go with him! Cant remember the last time I went to a really posh restaurant!
I'm not so brilliant with dates but my husband is. Sometimes it just works out like that...