To think that Denise Fergus should have stayed at home?

[2blessed2bstressed]

I don't understand why she (mum of Jamie Bulger) had to go and sit in court when John Venables was being sentenced for his more recent crime. I will never forget the horror of hearing what happened to her little boy, and I know that she will never get over it - but how can it possibly help her to keep appearing on tv and making statements about what happens now? She seems to feel she has a right to be told all about everything, and while I can sympathise with her opinion to a certain extent I don't know that she does really. I saw her being interviewed when he was arrested earlier in the year and she said she'd had to keep her children off school because of the publicity - but she seems to be generating a lot of it herself.
Please don't think me hard hearted, it's just that I don't get it.

Children committing unspeakable acts on other children create a conflict in a lot of people.

The detatched adult part of me does want vengeance on behalf of the murdered child.

The mum part of me doesn't want to believe any normal child would do such a thing to another, they must be monstrous.

But the rational side of me knows it's not the murderers 'fault' as they have been brutalised themselves.

None of the ways I think about it are right or wrong, it's a combination of them all, but how you can reconcile all the parts is beyond me.

You can say you need people to assess Venables needs in an objective way, but how can a human being be objective about such an emotive situation?

But the point is that he was given the absolute best in rehabilitation - so, perhaps, he was just a bad seed.

Thompson did manage to sort himself out didn't he?

Nancy66- He was totally mollycoddled in custody as a child, they both were. Given the best education, counselling possible and helped out loads to prepare him for "the real world". Tbh I think there comes a time when the excuse "but he had a lousy childhood" stops working and you have to accept that he is evil scum.

I meant to say at the end that I agree with you nancy pressed send to early.

It wasnt their fault they had a bad upbringing, but there are mant people out there who had an equally crap upbringing and havent gone onto commit murder.

I have every sympathy with Mrs Fergus and until any of us have been in her position then who are we to judge.

I'm not saying I disagree with you prozac, but by mollycoddled do you mean shown the love, respect and understanding we like to treat children with in our society?

I'm not sure the opposite would have helped him either. He could have been sent to a 1980's type of juvenile detention centre to be further damaged.

Even a middle ground of keeping a respectful distance and showing no emotion towards him as a person so he just served his time so to speak, would have 'worked'.

They're thankfully such isolated incidents, but that makes it hard to know what to do with offenders like this. Each child and their circumstances are different, so how can you bring together a rehabilitiation package that helps each of them?

Both boys were very immature for their age - so I would strongly question the wisdom of letting them out at 18.

I think a few more years would have helped them and given them opportunity, as adults, to face up to what they did as children.

'but there are mant people out there who had an equally crap upbringing and havent gone onto commit murder.'

A large proportion of adults who were abused as children don't go on to commit serious criminal offences.

But then a large proportion of adults who commit serious criminal offences have been abused as children.

It's not an excuse, but it is a reason, if that makes sense.

Yes OP I think yabvu to think Denise Fergus should do anything you think she should do.

It's not for you or anyone else to tell her how to deal with her feelings about the loss of her son in horrific circumstances. As long as she's not dealing with them by breaking the law, it's simply no-one else's place to comment. I can't imagine the grief that woman has to live with, how she deals with it is her business.

I don't agree with much she says BTW, but it simply isn't my place to say she shouldn't say it. I can disagree with her arguments, but there is absolutely no way I can disagree with her right to live with her grief the best way she can.

It's obviously more palatable to believe that Venables had this horrific childhood that turned him into a monster. After all, if he didn't, it could happen to anyone.

Problem is, there's no evidence, is there? Most people who know him agree that he came from a loving home.

This indulgence in excuse making is just sick. The bloke's a dangerous paedophile. He alway was.

at what you've just written desanimaux.

Hypothetically of course, but if I heard anyone saying that to me in real life I would tell them that they were a fucking heartless, cruel bitch who should look at the way they see life.

What a nasty, nasty post.

Perhaps it was designed to shock.

I have reported my first ever post desanimaux

Be gone with you

That is the most vile post I have ever read on any internet forum.

Go on then, unless you're a troll, defend your point of view, I'd like to hear what you have to say.

Your life must be utterly miserable, to go around with thoughts like those... Shame.

I can't believe there are many parents who can honestly say they have never lost sight of their child in public for even a single second.

And - oh what's the point. Intelligent debate is obviously not your thing, desanimaux

She let him wander about unsupervised.
If you saw it today it may well end up in AIBU!

Like I say...intelligent debate...not so much!

Were you there?

Does it even fucking matter if thats true?