to have got...

[hairytriangle]

Lilly of the valley oil (to increase sperm movement by 50%)

A motley assortment of crystals for fertility

a few sessions of reflexology and acupuncutre

orange bedding (the right colour for conception, I'm told)

Zita west supplements

An assortment of organic food, including seeds, nuts, dried fruit, organic milk, lentils etc etc

To have completely overhauled my diet to a very healthy one

Thing is I'm not actually obsessed -yet- but I just want to give it my best shot

oh bugger, I messed up the strikeout...
yet

make sure you allow some time amongst all your preparations to actually have sex

how does a colour help conception? can sperm see?

sorry.... best of luck with it all!

PMSL @ mitfordsisters - shit, hadn't thought of that LOL

PMSL @ lewisfan -apparently, you should surround yourself in orange according to colour therapy - not sure I believe that but it's worth a go?

appaently it's scientifically proven that sperm can pick up the smell of lilly of the valley and it makes them swim twice as fast. Who knew!!!

don't forget the folic acid - the only scientific item you'll need...

good luck, btw.

ooohhhhh I think I remember reading blue was the colour of fertility

well, love, its all bollocks. However, if it makes you feel like you are helping, go for it

good luck anyway, oh, and try and have some fun, fgs, don't make procreation such a grim and scientific process

I am not being mean, btw, I suffered from infertility for years, so I do know what I am talking about

I thought it was beige. No wonder I had such severe fertility problems.

Cheers anyfucker I'm having fun and really not finding it a chore . Pma all the way

didn't take your post as mean

Tbh it's a bonus to me that I am actually ttc @pinches self@ . Looong story ... But I feel truly blessed to be even trying just doing some simple stuff that might help.

Lilly of the valley smells like old ladies though @barf@

aww, ht, sounds like there may be a bit of a backstory here

have fun trying !

Won't bore u with the back story but suffice to say children with ex was out of the question and I suppressed my needs . Finally grew some balls and now happily trying

If you have grown balls, that may be the problem.

If orange is the colour, how about a spray tan?
Or maybe you'd get lost in the bed clothes and the sperm wouldn't find you.

If you want to go the whole hog, according to myth and pagan history, a 'night' on the Cerne Abbas giant does the trick.

Good luck.

My mum says Cherry Brandy worked for her

loving the replies

I tried for dd for 6 years with a few mcs in the middle. I agree with the 'enjoy it' theory. My girl was born from a birthday shag after all the trials and tribulations of trying and trying and trying.....

When I remember how she was made, I think of bouncing off walls and eating strawberries dipped in chocolate Much nicer than the boring, ooh, it's conception time, shags!!!

lol @ tethers

[Sprays orange pants with lily of the valley - wonders if sperm will swim out into pants instead of the other way - changes pants].

relaxing and trying not to worry about it definately does help. dd was concived when we'd given up trying and decided to have fun instead.

Weirdly I did conceive (ectopic) whilst moving n going out on a red wine bender! After kind of forgetting we were ttc due to move!

If you want to take it a little further try a pagan fertility spell

ht...i am devising a spell for you right now !

alikazam

now you must shag in a filthy manner

But not too filthy. Bumsex does not help the conception process. Apparently.