The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

Good morning all, yesterday was day 45……and I FORGOT to tick it off on my Try Dry app, so for the first time not only did I not think about drinking, I didn’t think about not drinking either, it just didn’t cross my mind!

I listened to a podcast lately (sorry I can't actually remember what it was!) but it was talking about old crushes and flings and how we build them up in our heads . The reality is always different and messy and there's a hundred reasons it won't work but our brain is again making us chase the high we once got . This is especially true when we're feeling anxious and vulnerable. It is probably that he is feeling the same.

I'm not proud of it but I saw an ex a few times in the lead up to getting married - absolutely nothing happened and we met as if to just catch up and both acted as if it was completely innocent. But I look back now and think what was the purpose of this? I know I was feeling lots of emotions at the time and it was all bred out of that. I'd imagine we'd have that one more fling. Urgh what a horrible lady I was. He gives me the heeby jeebies now. I'm sure he's a lovely match for his wife but eww not for me.

Rambling sorry @TheMentalMentalLoadbut I suppose what I'm saying is remember what your brain is trying to do.

Your description of the fling brain is 100% me @LavranderI think they call it a trauma bond. This guy was there when my first marriage ended. It was a few weeks of amazing intensity and he said all the right things to me then ghosted me out of the blue and I was left feeling so hurt and confused. It took me a long time to get him out of my head. Me & him being back in touch will not lead anywhere good.

I used one of those foot packs once…my feet were such a state afterwards! It was the height of summer and they looked like they were dying they were peeling so badly!

Happy Friday everyone. IWNDWYT.

@WendyWagon

I think your last quote needs to go on every new thread, it really spoke to me.

“We can have everything but the drink, it doesn’t suit us, it doesn’t serve us”

@TwoNicePuppies I think the forgetting to log in on Try Dry is a real milestone. I just go and do a few days when I feel like it now. Huge well done!

@TheMentalMentalLoad I have an old relationship that I often think about, very intense and didn’t work out but followed me for a long time before I met my lovely husband and had kids. Agree it’s just the brain chasing those highs. Hopefully we have different good memories to take over soon. 50 days is epic buy yourself something nice.

Ooh Ladies I've found a sapphire blue Mulberry.
I of course have the big sapphire from my birthday, yet to be set.
Very tempting.

Hello lovely shipmates. Sunny but cold here today. And no rain!

No need to apologise for anything @TheMentalMentalLoad - we hear you and understand. Most of us feel like that at some point, more than once. x

The handbag sounds good @WendyWagon - hope you are feeling a bit better? Sid sends you 💐x

Strength, peace and courage. It will be alright. xx

Morning all.
Glad to hear you sounding a bit more chipper @WendyWagon . Have you seen that The Walsh Sisters will be coming to I player on 21 February- based on Marian Keyes books including Rachel’s Holiday

Yesss. St Marion, she of the re-formed boozers.

I'm only banging on about shopping lads due to being housebound. Ignore me if I'm getting up my own ar*e!

No ar~e apology needed @WendyWagon I like the shopping talk. It inspired me and Sid to watch the Sex & The City episode "A Woman's Right to Shoes" last night, hehe

Sorry you are still housebound. Are you not even able to peep out of your front door for a breath of fresh air and to delight anew in the rainfall? It must be very frustrating. Sending love from me and wags from Sid.

Tomorrow it will be exactly three years since the day I first met Sid. 💖 x

Happy anniversary to you both😀

Morning all. Hope everyone’s having a good Saturday. I’ve gone to bed and woken up with a horrible headache. So frustrating as we’re going away for the weekend today, but at the same time I’m feeling relieved it’s not a hangover (even if it feels like one). This weekend is probably going to be my first proper tricky one after 41 days of no drinking. Meeting friends who are drinking at a pub but I’ve prepared myself by researching the non alcoholic options and preparing for an early exit. But now wondering if I should go at all!

hope everyone has nice weeekend plans.

That’s bad luck @chocopuffs I think if you’ve a headache it might make it doubly hard. Will you feel you’ve missed out if you don’t go?

Aw @chocopuffs that’s rotten, hopefully a couple of ibuprofen should do the trick and you can enjoy your sober weekend away.

A cold one in this part of the world today, minus -2. The thought of going out and defrosting my car to go and pick up breakfast stuff is not a fun one 🥶

I’m off out with friends today. Hope everyone has a belting Saturday, we deserve it!

Morning all.

I'm up and fuming at waitrose for substituting my Wellington. The DH has offered to go hunting! He loves shopping and a task. He reminds me of Victor from Wear Rabbit at times!

Some might remember me having a blip and 'stealing' the DS' s Wellington a few Christmases ago. He didn't speak all festive season. Ended in a huge row. It was funny though as his dad chomped away on £25 quid of beef and refused to hand it over to the 'rent free lodger, aka the son'. As I gave up red meat I haven't eaten one for yonks but I really fancied it. Curses.

I hope everyone has a peaceful day. We have sun here. I'm off down for Yorkshire tea and a hot cross bun.

We have the sun!!! The actual sun! I can feel my mood lifting a bit already.

Day 50 for me today. It feels like a massive achievement. I’ve done 75 days before as my longest streak.

Well done @TheMentalMentalLoad 50 days!

What are you buying yourself as a treat?

@WendyWagon we can have everything but the drink. It doesn’t serve us. Words to live by! Did you get the beautiful blue bag? I’m a sucker for a handbag.
@eekwhatnow congratulations on 44 days!
@TwoNicePuppies isn’t it glorious when you realise you haven’t thought about drinking when it’s been all consuming for so long?
Congratulations @TheMentalMentalLoad on 50 days!
@chocopuffs i hope you’re ok? I find if you really have to go then holding firm on the first 2 drinks means you’ve asserted your position and nobody notices after that! Just try to remember all the reasons youve chosen not to drink and how pleased you will be when you succeed. And if it all feels too much then you can excuse yourself on account of the headache and read a good book with a cuppa!

@Carpetburn I did buy the bag! So naughty but I love that royal blue.
(My friend said I should stop wanging on but I never buy new bags. Lightly loved).
I have a coat in the colour but I look like the honey monster in it! Ditto a jacket.
I am today modelling my £3.52 Jersey trousers and they fit me perfectly. Sadly discontinued. Curses

Evening, Shipmates! A bit of a tough week for me. My sister and I are trying to sort out COP for my mum who has dementia, and getting the runaround from unhelpful HCPs and social services. I rang her to talk about it and she'd gone to her local pub to decompress - had to fight feelings of envy even though I was much more of a home drinker than a pub drinker (and her local is a pretty grim sort of place). I stayed strong.

A pleasant day today, though - went on a coach trip with DH. Found a charity shop bargain - Past Times earrings new in box for £3.50. I used to love Past Times (now defunct as a brand) - I wore Past Times jewellery on my wedding day - so love finding their items now.

Oooh, amazing! I always wanted a Mulberry Alexa, never got one - I do have an 'Alexa inspired' leather bag but it isn't the same, it's in black and I liked the coloured ones they used to do.

What rotten luck! I hope your day turned out OK whether you went away or opted for a cosy one at home. At least with a random headache you don't have the associated fear and grubby kind of feeling that a hangover headache gives - if you can shift the headache you feel OK whereas a hangover headache leaves a horrible residue for at least the rest of the day, often the day afterwards too.

Happy Valentines Shipmates, for those that use it, another mission to tick off on Try Dry.

SUNSHINE!!! Not now, obviously - but a more recent memory than latterly. Late night for me - am watching some dreadful Channel 5 celebrity tosh, but off to bed soon to listen to Counterpoint. I get about 97% correct of anything after about 1960, and about 0.3% of anything else (although can often lucky guess the opera stuff, weirdly).
Happy Sid-Versary @REP22, I hope you’re both watching Police Interceptors to mark the occasion

Checking in. Does anyone else really struggle to sleep past about 8am now they’ve stopped drinking? My little cat does tend to wake me up for his breakfast around then, but I’d guesstimate that 4 weekends out of five I’m already awake. This was never the case when I was drinking, could sleep all day.

Anyway, it’s Sunday, one of my favourite days of the week. Hopefully you all have a great day, a sober Sunday.