Continuing support thread for those trying to live an alcohol free life - summer 2025

[Onewildandpreciouslife]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.

The original thread was started by @drybird in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.

Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.

All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain completely . If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there if that is your aim. That doesn’t mean that none of us has ever slipped, or that you can’t post here if you do - all we ask is that you are genuinely trying to stop drinking alcohol completely.

It’s not easy to be sober, but it is so, so worth it. Your alcohol-free life can be better than you ever dreamed. Come on in.

@Swanchaser

Well done for pushing through and having the courage to and the self belief. You can do this, you really can. Waking up tomorrow without a sore head and worried soul will also hopfully strengthen your resolve for tomorrow as well.

Foubd it hard to sleep early so read for a bit and then kind of did the victorian ghost child thing of just staring at the wall... but have not drank so success. Will rest now, looking forward to tomorrow with another un-tainted hungover mind and body ❤️‍🩹

It took me ages to be able to sleep, and I devised a ritual to make being awake at least pleasant.

I would have a scented bath then get in a made bed in a scented (and tidy) room in pretty pyjamas, and watch undemanding tv until I was tired, then listen to hypnosis tracks through sleep headphones. I came to associate the smell of the oils with relaxation, and looked forward to some time on my own at the end of the day. I still use the headphones (they are basically an eye mask with speakers inside), sometimes for rain noise and sometimes for hypnosis if I feel the need.

It is so much better than falling into an unmade bed in a tee shirt and passing out. It took a while to settle down but I just enjoyed watching things like Downton Abbey and Stella - no real attention needed and a million episodes to get through.

I loved the vivid dreams, too, and was quite disappointed when they wore off.

Thankyou again for your encouragement - not unexpectedly I've had a very broken night's sleep! @ShyMaryEllen falling a t-shirt resonates, I did actually put pyjamas on last night! Although I shall be tired today I won't have the anxiety and shame of the empties when I go downstairs later. Good luck to all, will continue to check in daily.

Edit - falling into bed in a t-shirt! (I also like the tip about improving my bedroom environment)

Morning all,

I've given myself an extra week to get ready for the house valuation. The DH is on annual leave so I'll have him putting up light fittings later.
I've also settled an old family debt and that's given me head space.

The DDs friends were here for eleven hours! They bought cake and tons of American confectionery. Both lad geeks but one is definitely sweet on the DD. Sire of famous booze family but he doesn't drink. No champagne challenge for me, they had doctor pepper!

I'll be off to the marks. My cousin is on the WLJ and she has noticed a reduction in booze cravings. Big nightly drinker and very belligerent when I gave up so I'm pleased for her.

Hello, can I join in again.
ill catch up with the thread tonight. I was doing super well and got stressed by life, poo.
just glanced at the last few posts and remembered how brilliant this thread and you all are. I am admitting to myself that I’m hiding from you all and that’s not good. I guess if I come clean it takes the self induced pressure and shame off.
Day 1 for the millionth time.
IWNDWYT.

That's really interesting about your cousin @WendyWagon and fair play to her for letting you know.

I wonder what it is about the WLJs and alcohol cravings.

Big Food and Big Booze in combination have a lot to answer for! (Ambiguity intended...)

Morning all.
Welcome back @Healthynow - we have a few posters in their early days, so it’s a good time to join (although it’s always a good time to join!)

I’m back on day 1 :-(

@Theweecatsmum

You will get through it, you have before and you will again. Just 24 hours and you will be waking up without a hangover and things will be so much better. Just hang on today and be kind to yourself. Your back and trying again and that is what matters. IWNDWYT 😊

Determined to make AA this evening in person. Starts at half 7 so easier to get the kids in bed before I leave and have my eldest 'baby sit'. Its only 5 minutes away too and a lovely group.

Need to keep accountable and doing these meetings as I am starting to of course feel 'better'. But I will only reach a week after today of sobriety so such early days.

One day at a time. Today i will not drink. Today I will stay sober and do whatever it takes not to drink.

@Healthynow IWNDWYT 🥰

Afternoon everyone
IWNDWYT
GLP1s help with dopamine signalling - this is going to be completely unscientific but it basically stops your brain getting the little hit of dopamine it gets after a particular signal. So that can be food, alcohol, online shopping, doomscrolling.
Negatives are that it stops your brain getting a dopamine hit so it can also make you feel pretty low after a time if you're not working on general 'contentment'

I've had a bit of a finance sort this morning. My budgeting this year has been a complete mess and I've had no excuse. I'm certain that alcohol was the major culprit- I could say no to so many things due to finances but somehow still managed to find the wine money.
I have spent the morning cancelling or reducing subscriptions no matter how small. I'm more stressed than I was before but we have to face these things right.
On a positive note I reconnected with an old friend yesterday. I thought of her and I just thought why not message and say hello. I used to just not message people back because I'd invariably be drunk at the time and wouldn't want to have to check what I said afterwards. What a way to live eh.

This really spoke to me. And well done you for being here at all. You should be proud to be his mummy.
Im having a terrible day if I'm honest. Struggling with it all. Just wanted to check in. Hope everyone else is doing better than me

Life can be hard @Theweecatsmum and @Freedombeckonsme - be kind to yourself and just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

I hope you make your meeting tonight @Becky37 - I’m glad you’ve found somewhere supportive in real life

Sending lots of support @Freedombeckonsme. It IS a struggle which is why so many people don't even start. But you have and you're here, doing your best and trying to be better.
@Theweecatsmum- you are welcome back. And hello @Healthynow. I have also had many a day 1 that lasted only half a day. Hope you have something planned for this evening even if it's an early night and a bag of haribo.
Well done @Swanchaserhope you had a lovely night's sleep.

Quietly clambering back aboard The Good Ship on another Day1... 😖 It's just been a slow drip-drip of a few daily drinks, depleting me, wrecking my sleep, upsetting my guts, stealing my sunshine... I just lose all my oomphiness when I drink ANY amount! It has been really, really boring...

I'm pretty underpowered today and not feeling chatty, but I know that the first few days are always gruelling... I just need to get past this idea that I can ever control it... I always think 'this time it'll be different' and every time it gets out of hand and detracts from my life...

So a little walk, a lot of water and an early night and onwards and upwards! 🙂

@Becky37 , I hope you got your kids' faces scrubbed! 🤣🤡

@WendyWagon your DD is so right - it really does feel like 'self-harm'... to the spirit, as well as the body...

Im here and I'm not free. Asking for sober support please

Love and support to all who've had the courage to make it to day 1. Taking that first step is really hard but you've done it. Everybody on here wants everyone to succeed. They also understand how difficult it can be and want to cheer you on even if you stumble. We can all only keep on trying.

I'm on day 49 and whilst still challenging sometimes, it is actually getting a bit easier.

I wasn't overly looking forward to this weekend as ...
Friday was girls lunch out
Saturday was lunch at a friend's house - we normally do lots of chat with 2 bottles of wine.
Sunday was a family celebration

I was surprised that all three events were fine being alcohol free. I thought I was going to crave wine and feel a bit miserable.

I was on good form. I was bubbly and witty. It gave me positive hope that you can have a busy social weekend, enjoy it all and not be craving wine. I didn't even fight the wine witch. Just got on with it all.

Bless you! It is so hard to admit when you feel like you’re letting your kids down. Since he said it I’ve kicked myself wondering why I didn’t listen xx

Another day clocked off. I did replace wine with chocolate today but work was pretty dire so I was glad I didn’t give in to the 1/2 bottle of gin in the cupboard. I’ve gone well over weight watchers points today but I really needed to. I put a pair of clean trousers on they are usually pretty clingy and they were looser so I was pleased this morning, just had a Rochester ginger topped up with ginger ale in the hot tub. Now I’m in bed with a fennel tea. (None of these things were happening in the evening before. Apart from sitting on the sofa boozing) DH and I are nearly pain free (we’re doing this together), my swollen feet and ankles are now back to normal and I’m trying to get rid of the bloated feeling, but that is already a bit better. Hoping the fennel tea will help.

(sorry, it feels like showing off. I’m just so surprised how beneficial this is becoming. I see a lot of people saying ‘if I can do it so can you’ and in my head I’m always thinking ‘you’ve not met me yet, I’ve got less will power than anyone’ so I talked myself out of giving up. Dies that make sense?)

that’s a long post…sorry, I should probably write a diary.

have a peaceful night everyone. Tomorrow is another sunrise 🌞

It’s not showing off @MeAndTheDoggo (says me, fresh from a big show off post!), it’s marking a win. Every benefit should be celebrated. I heard someone say that their sober life had to be better than their drinking life, otherwise what was the point? It’s why I like all the affirmations, although am utterly incapable of writing any myself. Each little win mounts up, creating happiness and positivity. And lawd knows the world needs more of that right now.

Well done @Kipperandarthur on your 49 days.
'I was surprised that all three events were fine being alcohol free. I thought I was going to crave wine and feel a bit miserable.
I was on good form. I was bubbly and witty. It gave me positive hope that you can have a busy social weekend, enjoy it all and not be craving wine. '
What you said above really resonated with me. Now that I'm sober I sometimes worry about craving drink at events but I don't and enjoy them sober and think I'm actually better company than I was when drinking as I'm just.. Present. I have a wedding later this week so must remind myself of that.
Well done everyone, especially those who've had a tough day. We've for this. I'm 4 months off the booze and this thread has given me great support.