200 days alcohol free- anyone wish to join?

[FeelingLessTired]

Several years ago, under another user name I did a 100 day alcohol free challenge and alot of people joined me on MN. It was before covid, so a long time ago!

I really appreciated the support and lasted 120 days in the end. ironically enough DH joined me IRL and he just continued on and has been teetotal since then.

I was reading Annie Grace back then (I think) and her recommendation was that if you slip, to then challenge yourself for double the time- hence I now wish to start and achieve a 200 day challenge.

I'd love some company if anyone wishes to join me!

I have a funeral today and plan to drink J20 with tonic water. The deceased was a good friend of DH's and although he was in his early 70s drinking definitely played a part in his extreme fragility over the past few years. He's been really ill for a good ten years I think.

I have set out a spread sheet with my alcohol-free savings. In the last week i have definitely reduced and have saved just shy of £50 already (since the beginning of April) as we have had a fair few dinners and lunches out. I look at what I would have drunk (sauvignon blanc here and there) and when i have not had it I add that cost to my spreadsheet. That does help to inspire me because COL is biting us hard right now.

@FeelingLessTired
Thanks ❤️
I go on Friday.
I've had a bad day really - I'm not usually this negative. I was thinking before this is the kind of scenario where before, I'd just drink. Blot it all out.
But, I've got my journal out and wrote down what's bothering me.
I've decided that if my arm / shoulder does hurt - badly enough, I'm just going to have to speak to the organisers. That's what they're there for. That's what I've paid for.
Until then best foot forward and a positive attitude.

Hope you feel better tomorrow @Goandygo ❤. Do you know what is triggering your feelings? Hopefully they will soon pass.

Good to have a plan if you are in pain while on your holiday. I hope it goes well and you have a wonderful time.

I am extremely tired today. Totally could not cope with the idea of cooking so we went out to a local Italian. The waitress brought me an alcohol cider not the AF cider by accident and I sent it back. I felt really embarrassed doing that- but I was not going to drink it. I wasn't even tempted by it. So that is something- there was a time when I would have used it as an excuse; 'It's not my fault.... What can I do?'. So I am proud about that.

Day 25 for me tomorrow. I remember when you were on Day 25 way back @Goandygo and I never really thought that was achievable for me. Not deep down. So- it's really a big achievement for me. And it's definitely thanks to this thread and all of us on it.

Take care everyone. No matter what- tomorrow is another day. And it's story has not yet been written. 🌻🌺🌟

@88expertprocastinator I actually waited until today to get my month crystal out as yesterday would have been a month since my last drink, today is a whole month sober! How are you feeling today? Do you think your mood is a result of being AF or other factors? You're so close to crossing that 200 day line!!!! Yes, please do stay!

@FeelingLessTired huge well done on day 24! The days are really starting to add up now! Good on you for sending the cider back. I felt exactly the same way when I was stood with the 'prize' drink the other day - breaking my streak for that really wouldn't have been worth it and I didn't want it either, but once upon a time I definitely would have said fuck it, and then that slip would have been a slide!! It's funny you say about remembering when @Goandygowas on Day 25 because I specifically remember when she was on Day 33 (same as me today) and I didn't think actually think that was achievable for me either, not really.

@Goandygo how long are you away for? Good idea to have a plan if you have any shoulder/arm pain. It might be a good idea to give them the heads up anyway?

I had a trigger today - one that would normally have sent me to the shop for wine to 'deal' with it, but not today. I was tempted at one point, but it was fleeting.

I also bought myself a nice dish for my crystals today - photo attached shows new dish with daily crystals (both previous drinking days from beginning of July now gone!) plus my one month sober bigger stone, and of course my weekly stars. I know it all sounds a bit silly but I love seeing a visual progress like that. I am beginning to lose track of the exact days now and need to check my app to find it out, which I'm taking as a good sign!

Hope everyone else is well ♥️

@FeelingLessTired @paintcolourchart I can't believe you both remember my timelines and that it affected you in such a positive way ( even if at first it didn't seem achievable). Little old me who previously couldn't get past 10 days.
@FeelingLessTired thanks for your concern. I think I've just got pre - holiday jitters. I've never done this type of holiday before. It's just fear of the unknown.
Well done on sending the cider back ! We had a reverse - I ordered af, dh normal - she brought 2 x af so dh just drank it !
@paintcolourchart that's a good idea to give them the heads up - thanks. (Away for 4 days with a stay in a hotel either side, so I'll make sure to have a good soak !).
And, your idea isn't silly at all. It's absolutely brilliant and clearly working for you. A whole month af is really good. Keep smashing it.
I'm losing track too. I'm counting in months now. I know my last drink was 31st May, so June (30), July (31), etc. This is useful for getting to 100, then 200 which like you two, when I first joined here, never thought I could achieve it in my wildest dreams.
I keep thinking what you said earlier @paintcolourchart I'm thinking like a teetotaller ( with the odd blip ! ).

@paintcolourchart i definitely think the low mood is connected with being af - was going great - very positive but an overwhelming sense of boredom and sadness has hit - a bit of nothing at all to look forward to. No idea why but I’m not being driven to drink and just hanging on in until it all goes back to normal.

@FeelingLessTired 25 days is a big achievement. I was on my knees at the start, hoping to get to 4 days - I feel like that first week was so hard that I’m never going back to it (which is a great motivation to continue). And am totally impressed by you returning a drink!

@Goandygo maybe I should start a journal but for knows what I’d write in it!

big few weeks coming up with visitors and trips away and a birthday too. My first adult sober birthday that I can remember - hoping this funk has lifted by then. Tomorrow will be my 200th day af and according to trydry I’ll have saved around £1800 and a boatload of calories and units (too embarrassing to say how many precisely but over 2000 units so approximately 200 bottles of wine!). Absolutely shocking when I put it like this.

hope you’re all doing well!

@88expertprocastinator wow, that is a lot of money. I don't really like apps that are often recommended but I know I have miles more money - it doesn't surprise me.
I was a bit flat a while back then I remembered that in my journal ( a while back, way before joining this thread), I'd written a list of all the things I could enjoy af and all the things I could do af ( ranging from little things to big things). It just works for me.
I had my first sober birthday when I was 29 days on this thread.
It was lovely - don't know why I was apprehensive.

Just popping in quickly but will post properly tomorrow.

Just hoping you are all well and that your low feelings @88expertprocastinator and @Goandygo pass soon.

@88expertprocastinator sorry you're feeling that way, I really hope it passes soon. Could you think of something to do that you wouldn't be able to do if you'd had a drink? Maybe plan an evening trip somewhere? I've just been to the beach again this evening but this time DH came with me as we have a guest who stayed with DS. We walked along in the sand and the sea barefoot, had an ice cream and took a hot drink flask with us. It was lovely and we definitely couldn't have done that if we'd had a drink as we had to drive there. I definitely don't feel I missed out being AF tonight as we had a nicer time doing something different. Or could you treat yourself to buying something nice just for you with some of the money you've saved? Do you have any plans for tomorrow? 200 days is absolutely huge and definitely needs celebrating!!

Thanks @FeelingLessTired - I’m sure it will pass.

@paintcolourchart your evening sounds great! I have a virus of some sort so have zero energy and huge swollen glands - went for a tea with my friend but wiped out from it. Also all of our hiking etc is banned due to wildfire risk - no rain here for ages and we unfortunately had huge fires 2 years ago. Tomorrow I have my hair appointment at 8am - nothing planned to celebrate but may take the dog out or go for a kayak - actually will defo go for a kayak and take some music and sparkling water

CONGRATULATIONS @88expertprocastinator !!!

The first of our Tribe to reach 200 days!!!!!!

Hello again. Your evening sounds really lovely @paintcolourchart .

@88expertprocastinator I was reading about something called PAWS. It is 'Post Alcohol Withdrawl Syndrome' (or something). Apparently it is quite normal after being AF for a bit to have a big drop in mood. A 'is this all there is?' moment. Not sure if that helps you with how you are feeling though. Hope so much that your virus is soon gone as well.

Something to report which may not sound big but is big for me. I have always had alot of negative self-talk which I have been trying to get myself out of. One thing I do is I call myself 'stupid cow' inside my head very very often. I've been trying for months to get myself out of that habit, because I'm neither of those things really. Yesterday I went over on my ankle and thought 'stupid cow' then I realised I have actually not called myself that in the past 25 days! It's vanished (except for yesterday). This is MAJOR. I am so pleased. All these little joys are adding up for me.

Day 26. I'm meeting a friend after work for 'drinks' which has been in the diary forever. The place we are going has great mocktails so that's me sorted.

Hope everyone has a lovely day.

@88expertprocastinator congratulations on day 200.
You're really inspirational ❤️💯
Hope you're feeling really proud of yourself and that you have a wonderful day.

@FeelingLessTired it's not a little thing at all, the negative self talk. It's massive. I stopped talking to myself like that a few years back. Wish I'd have done it sooner.
I now talk to myself like I would a friend. It's strange how we're our own worst enemies.
I feel like if I were to slip up, yes I'd be a bit annoyed at myself but I'd let it go and praise myself for getting this far.
Well done on Day 24 - enjoy your mocktails. It's great that we can peruse menus before going out.

Overall, I've no interest in drinking. I just can't be bothered. I did picture a glass of wine yesterday ( not sure why ), but overall, I'm over it. I think I was thinking of my holiday and evenings - wondering if people sit out at night drinking. That would definitely have been me. I'd drink greedily then show myself up one way or another.
I've decided I'm just going to have af drinks and let them all get on with it. I can still socialise - I've still got my sparkling personality and interesting chat 🤣

and we have our first to 200 days!!!!!!!! HUGE well done @88expertprocastinator - you have done amazingly well and are an inspiration to us all. I'm sorry you're feeling ill and down in general. @FeelingLessTired is right about the PAWS thing - I'd forgotten about that but it came up in the Clare Pooley book, so hopefully it'll pass soon. Being ill certainly won't help. I hope you're being pampered at the hairdressers today and it helps you feel a little bit better. You really are amazing.

@FeelingLessTired that's huge and not a tiny thing at all!!! Really lovely to read. I love that @Goandygo about talking to yourself a friend. I have noticed my confidence improve slightly since I quit which is good, but still a way to go. Before DC I was pretty ok but since then I've noticed it plummet so it's good to get a bit of it back. Rather vainly I think losing weight will help.

@Goandygo I have no interest in drinking either. It's really strange (as in because I'm so shocked that I feel this way). There was a group of people sitting on the beach drinking last night, and I didn't feel jealous at all. We had just as much of a lovely time without. Sounds really cheesey but I felt like I was more immersed in the experience and noticing nature rather than just concentrating on when it was acceptable to pour myself another glass of wine, and then make an idiot of myself and regret it all in the morning.

It's funny you use the word sparkling - we have a new saying in our house since our drinking event on Saturday. The next day my mum was hungover and I said something like 'if you'd had sparkling water like me, then today you would feel... ✨sparkly✨' and it just kind of stuck 😂 (I didn't say it in a preachy way!)

Thank you all for the well wishes.cant wait to celebrate you all getting to 200 days - I know it seems so far away but omg. It came around pretty quickly!

@FeelingLessTired what you wrote about negative self talk really struck a chord - I am the same but have got so much better since quitting. It’s definitely something to watch out for. Hope your ankle is ok!

@Goandygo I think you’ll be absolutely great on your holiday and whether people are drinking or not, your holiday would be made so much worse with alcohol.

@paintcolourchart i may be biased but I think we are all pretty amazing …..and I love the thought of feeling sparkly everyday!

@paintcolourchart I have many motivators to give up, but the main one is to lose weight / get healthier ( same thing).
I had to laugh reading your post. Dare I say it....I'm vain, too 🤣💯

@Goandygo 😂 I was a size 10-12 5 years ago but since DC I'm 2.5 stone heavier and now a 14-16. Something needs to change! I feel in the right frame of mind now though so when i get back to normal after visitors this week I will start to seriously tackle it then. Well, sort of. My next 2 weeks I'm planning on a serious catch up with work and studies, and then after that I'm planning on a serious catch up with weight loss. Everything is just a bit of a juggle atm, sighhhhh. BUT it's much easier to juggle without factoring wine in as well! I also echo what @88expertprocastinator says about your hol - it'll 100% be made worse with wine.

How are you feeling now @88expertprocastinator ?

Day 34 for me (I miscounted the other day!). A shiny new star for me tomorrow. It should strictly be Saturdays rather than Fridays because Saturdays are weeks since sober whereas Fridays are weeks since my last drink, but I find it more motivating to give it to myself on Fridays! 5th star tomorrow, I can't believe it tbh.

Hope everyone is feeling ✨sparkly✨ today!

Oh and my mum said my skin looked 'glowing' today, so that's nice! She actually said it was a motivator for her to cut down too.

@paintcolourchart yes, my skin always shows signs of improvement when I abstain. Even though I don't always sleep well, I'm grateful I'm not hungover tired, as opposed to just tired.

I think my sister is going to give up. She's a 5 pints type of gal - not every night - maybe twice a week. She messaged me yesterday as she was hungover saying she felt like she'd been poisoned. I said, in a way, you have.

My skin looks better too. The skin around my eyes is less puffy and my eyes are deffo brighter. I had a big breakout last week but that's gone now.

Great news about your sister!

Really looking forward to seeing your new star! I still have my little star necklace I am saving for 200 days.

I was size 12 about 8-ish years ago. 3 stone heavier now.

Thanks all for kind words about my self talk revelation. . I can't ever recall not berating myself over something. This has been so much more peaceful!

Had a good meetup with my friend. I had a mocktail made of rose lemonade, lemon and a splash of something else I can't recall. It was interesting and I did not miss alcohol at all.

Hope you are feeling much better today @88expertprocastinator

Talk again tomorrow everyone. Sweet dreams. ❤

What a lovely mum you have @paintcolourchart - mine is not quite so supportive but I let it all go over my head now. My daughter is very proud of me tho! My mood has improved as the day has gone on so maybe just hormones sending me crazy?

I aged terribly after quitting drink but I did lose a huge amount of weight - seems like it’s all settled down a bit and my skin has bounced back a bit now (or maybe I’ve got more used to the wrinkles!) nothing wrong with a bit of vanity….

@88expertprocastinator she wasn't so supportive when she was wafting her Prosecco in front of my nose on Saturday at the event 😂 I did remind her that if I wanted one I would just go up to the bar to get one! I did drive but could have easily have left the car. Sorry your mum isn't very supportive though, that's not very nice. My mum doesn't quite know how often I was drinking before. Yay for your daughter though!

Still waiting for the weight to drop off here (obviously I need to do a bit more about this!), although looking a little slimmer overall which is quite alarming really considering my weight hasn't changed.

Having an extremely productive evening and sorting out the whole of the downstairs!

@paintcolourchart i think the alcohol puffs my face up - I didn’t lose any real weight for the first month but my face defo looked slimmer and my belly was pretty much the first thing to go Well done on your productivity - I have steam cleaned half of the floors but have now lost interest….