Giving up alcohol in your 50s

[GreenTeaSipper]

Evening. I’ve just had this overwhelming realisation that I must stop drinking now, after years of drinking too much. It’s been my crutch since forever, but I realise now that this crutch is my ultimate enemy. I’ve just turned 50, and thought of drinking for the rest of my life, fills me with utter dread. I’ve tried to cut down and stop over the years, but clearly has worked. But today a feeling came over me, the realisation that I stop completely. That i have neglected myself completely but now I have to take care of myself. With this realisation, I am now panicking about my health and generally about the state of my life. I am so angry at how I’ve messed up so much of my life, even though on paper it’s a good life.

Has anyone given up alcohol, successfully in their 50s or older? If so how did things work out? I was going to drink tonight but have suddenly gone off the idea. Is it possible to turn it around at this point in a person’s life?

I had a similar epiphany last year in my early fifties and haven’t had any alcohol since. I joined a thread on here, did some hypnotherapy and use the Try Dry app to log dry days. After a lifelong drinker, I found it easy but I think it was because - like you - I realised I needed to stop. So I did.

Don’t panic, just quit drinking. Book in with your GP surgery for some blood work, kind of a midlife Mot, and find a new crutch. I highly recommend reading biographies.

Thats inspirational. I’ll take a look at the app. I just want to be done with it. I feel almost tearful just thinking how I have squandered my life in this way.

Thank you. I’ve been reading about famous former drinkers who are now sober. Some inspiring stories.

I feel same as you. I know I should stop or at the very least drastically cut back. I alternate alcohol free days and feel so good and get so much done - I then reward myself with wine, rinse and repeat.
Sorry no answers but am following for ideas myself.

It’s definitely a vicious circle.

I quit in lockdown.
Never drank until my 30s and never drank alot I just fell into bad habits.
Weekends were the worst.
Dry Jan became Feb then did it until Easter then realised I could just keep going.
I was 53 when I stopped.

There are definitely some interesting stories about famous drinkers who stopped. I lived in Los Angeles in the 90s and everyone was in rehab or thinking about going. It took me years to finally leave the wine behind but I managed it in my own time. You are not alone in your journey.

I'm in my 50s & stopped 18 days ago - I feel it's for real & for good, & I get the sense that's how you might be feeling. There is no bad time to listen to yourself and do what you really feel you need to do, even if it's a big change - do yourself a favour & give it a go. Some people time limit it to begin with so it's not so scary - eg, 'I'm gonna stop for a year, or 9 months, or 6 months or 3 months'. I think one month is probably not enough, if you want to really see what the difference is between being 'someone who drinks' & being AF. Often people then decide to carry on not drinking. The thing is, it's a matter of choice - you can drink if you want to, & you can choose to have a break for a while, or for the rest of your life - it's your life, you get to choose how you live it :) I decided to 'just see how not drinking goes, how long I can stick to not drinking, from 1st Jan onwards'. I then plunged into sober podcasts, quitlit, a very supportive thread on here, a sober cafe meet-up, etc, & as the days passed I felt more & more firmly I just wanted to stop, to not drink again. There have been big benefits already - I am less worried about my health now I know I'm not sticking a poison down my neck regularly, I feel closer to my son, I'm more proud of myself, I feel more at home in myself, I have lots of lovely spare time now - and other things! Knowing I'm gonna be saving many £££s is a good motivator!

I’m 51 now, but stopped 3.5 years ago so when I was 48

Thank you. Yes, I am going to see how it goes, for the next while, and then hope I can go sober for the long term.

Brill! On a podcast someone said "Give yourself the gift of time - how the hell do you know what it's going to feel like unless you give yourself that that gift of time trying it?" x

Try to see this as an exciting new stage in your life. I don’t believe in regrets. Treat yourself with kindness. I gave up in my late 40s and it’s been life changing. Keep posting! Good luck x

Ps I agree with taking it a few days at a time. I just planned a break from drinking but kept going and here I am 5 years on!

There are loads of things to support you in giving up alcohol now. Look for quit lit on Amazon for books. Podcasts, apps, Facebook groups, pay for programs are all available.
The Life's Better Without Alcohol group on Facebook is a lovely free group and its founder offers a paid for program called shrink the drink which is very successful.
Being alcohol free in your 50s is brilliant. It has changed my life. But it can be hard than you expect and you need to re-frame your mindset about alcohol and have a plan and a mental toolbox for when it is tough. Good luck!

You can do it. Feeling you really want to stop is a great start.

I would read ‘Alcohol Explained’ by William Porter - it definitely adds to the want to stop feeling and helps you understand why it’s so easy to get in the habit of drinking too much.

Read and listen to everything you can get your hands on. The Sober Diaries, Joy of Being Sober.

It's never too late, my mum gave up in her mid 70s she was a lifelong drinker and has been sober now 16 months. Read lots of sober literature (the joy of being sober is great) and my mum found a new healthier crutch (she's now drinking Goodrays cbd drinks every night which she loves)

51 here. Nearly 80 days sober. It took several months of counselling, reading ALL the books, joining lots of forums before I built the confidence to step off the cliff so to speak. Feel SO much better and proud of myself. I keep a journal nearly daily charting how I feel and the benefits. Is it forever? Thats far too long to contemplate but I certainly hope I don't drink again.

Yes, it does feel like stepping off a cliff. Well done on your journey. Sounds very positive.

You absolutely can. I was early 40s when I quit (coming up to 2 years sober now), but actually know lots of women in their 50s and 60s who have stopped successfully. My MIL is coming up to a year sober at 70.

I’m exactly the same. In my 50s and been regularly drinking for years. It escalated and I was on a bottle of wine a day and doing dreadful damage to my heath and wellbeing.

I am very early days but dry January is my first step. Honestly didn’t think I would manage but today i am 3 weeks sober!

I'm 53, and currently 312 days sober. First 100 days are a bitch, and as much as anything, I've found it a bit like when someone significant died - each important date or celebration, etc, I've got to find a new way of celebrating, or marking it.

It has done wonderful things for my relationship with my husband and my girls.

Exactly my story

Thats my goal, to improve relationships, including with myself.