On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining, no judging, keep on being strong, new thread autumn 2024

[Nowstrong]

@Amdone123, @Freezingfeetwarmheart , @Bigbus,@Flumpywoo , @FiveShelties , @ForeverTipsy, @Hohofortherobbers,@Jbob1976,@walliedug,

Wanted to post and old thread wouldn't let me, so took the plunge...
Please tag everyone, don't want to leave anyone behind.

Still AF here and even starting to enjoy it. Nearly 2 months. Will write proper post later..
Hope you are all doing well. Stay strong. Wet vibes, 'cos it's raining.

Great work @BezMills! 5 months is great. I am gearing up for a big party we are hosting where I would usually be knocking them back but I am actually quite excited that I will be an active and present host, I will remember the whole evening and I wont make a tit of myself by getting slurry and messy at the end of the night. Also we have SO much booze in the house I wont be drinking now, so be good to get rid of some 🤣

@HorrorFan81 Yes - I keep looking at the shelf fill of bottles - wine, beer, some spirits etc - and wishing somebody would come and drink them! Enjoy your party!

I might do a lucky dip for everyone when they are leaving..take a bottle any bottle 🤣

When’s the party @HorrorFan81? I’m doing same next Saturday- but my thinking is more along moderating lines, have enough to loosen up and enjoy myself but not enough to become a crap host and have to clean up the next day with a hangover. Need to start by not have a drink before guests arrive!

That is a really good place to start! I started doing that last year. Not having "pre's". Before my mindful drinking journey began, my favourite glass of wine was at home whilst doing my hair and makeup. Then I'd have a nightcap when I got back. Now, I don't start until I'm out/friends are here, and have swapped the night cap for squash. It's these small changes that all add up to big ones imo.

One of my favourite drinks when entertaining, was the cook's wine. Glass for the sauce, glass for me!

We will be having a gang round for our Joxican Fiesta (Mexican & Scottish feast with tequila and whisky). This typically starts hard and gets messy. Everyone who comes likes a good drink, fair to say!

We usually have a couple rounds of toasts after the food (or is it before, can't remember lol) and I can definitely see me joining in with that, but possibly only that.

Off out over the water tonight to see Betty Boo, a trip which is a lot easier sober. I've left the car near the ferry terminal so I can drive home at 1am. The alternative is a 9 mile yomp, get lucky with a taxi, or book a hotel.

Same goes for next week. Friends were umming and ahing about going to see Human League but the risk of being stranded if they miss a tight ferry connection was off putting. I can just come along and be the driver. And it's my coughtieth birthday so that's nice!

I really like having the sober designated taxi superpower.

We broke out the 0% Asahi last night in the heat and also the 0% strawberry Kopparberg. Both very acceptable hot-day drinks to have when the mood is holiday but it’s not the weekend!

Ooh im definitely going to get some Kopparbergs. I had 0 Erdinger last night which i really liked. My DH had 0 Saint Ettienne which was lovely too. Will be breaking out the Mother Root tonight

Yesterday was my day 50 - halfway to 100 now! I've survived a holiday, meals out, nights out in the pub, entertaining people, sitting out in the garden in the sun and 50 6 o'clocks - all without alcohol. I'm amazed! That seemed impossible before I started. I was out with friends last night and the barman was very derogatory when someone else ordered an AF beer - said he couldn't see the point and that AF drinks were tasteless. I wonder if he's so sneering about other soft drinks?

Woohoo @LillyPJ you are doing so well. I’d suggest youre not surviving anymore but thriving! I do hope that anyone who felt like I did, reads these threads and is motivated to give it a go - I was very skeptical but these forums and the strangers on here have really helped.

@BezMills i also love being sober designated driver although my automatic reaction when planning a night out is to mentally work out how we can get home - then I remember, I won’t be drinking. Wonder how long it takes for that switch to flip.

@Addictforanex amd @ForeverTipsy i agree - any small changes you can make are great. My DH is also trying to moderate and I see him getting better at it as time goes on.

@AlertCat cant get those drinks here, but they sound great.

22 weeks tomorrow- still going strong

That’s brilliant @LillyPJ. So many sober milestones! My mental block is holidays, that for me would be the hardest to crack.

I have 2 teens and thanks to being a single mum and them needing driven around and picked up late, I am having a dry weekend. Feels good and am getting lots done!

Every one of you (I should say us, but I am too British) is doing really well!

I have decided not to bother with a gig on my birthday, I am doing BodyCombat at the gym, and the instructor is letting me teach a couple of tracks. To be then rushing about like a blue arsed fly just doesn't thrill me!

My wife has suggested inviting people over for my birthday and honestly I don't really feel like it! Everyone I know is a big drinker and I think being down town or maybe over at the club would be better. Then if I get jack of being social and noisy drunk friends I can just retreat to a nice calm house.

It feels a bit weird, but I guess I am just in a transition and weird is ok. It just has to be.

So we went out out on Friday and I stayed sober, and it was really nice. Got up feeling fresh and did a boot camp in the playing field near my house.

Yesterday we went to the sauna at the beach and afterwards had a pizza picnic, and I had my first beers since January. Didn't overdo it, and feel decent today. Back on the wagon again!

Hope you are all doing well

Good work @BezMills

I went along to a party v late on Saturday, just popped in when the kids had gone to bed. The party had started mid afternoon so everyone had been drinking for hours and it was MESSY. Quite hilarious to watch all the drunken antics and I wasnt even tempted to have a drink, especially given the state most people were in. My best friend couldn't stand up straight and kept falling against a wall whilst talking to me. It really helped cement my decision not to drink as usually I would be right there with them all and honestly its not attractive 😆

@HorrorFan81 Being with drunk people when I'm sober makes me realize how tedious and unfunny I must have been when I was drinking (I thought I was amazingly witty).

Same! I actually cringe when I think about some of the states I got myself in and how boring I must have been to sober people. And worrying at times when I started losing the ability to speak...

I know that I can still have fun and socialise when sober but there is a point in the evening when people start tipping into annoying drunk and thats when I make my exit

@HorrorFan81 and @LillyPJ i agree - drunk ppl get too drunk to enjoy after a while - that’s when o want to leave and go home!

@BezMills huge well done - I’m too scared to take that step of normal drinking. Also aiming to get to 6 months (in just over 2 weeks) and then 200 days. Don’t even like the smell of alcohol anymore so won’t force the issue for now.

Hoping you all have another good week!

Hi everyone, I'm still reading the posts and loving all the progress and reflections.

Still moderating-ish. Had a couple of nights where I've had too much and felt rough the next day. Got one more blow-out next Friday night then will go back to one or two here and there. It's so easy to tip into over-drinking when not tracking I've found (stopped tracking a few weeks ago but just know I'm around the 14 units per week mark again).

@Seenoevil33 huge congratulations on being a couple of weeks away from 6 months!! That's my aim for the autumn/winter. I think. Maybe !

Hi all, just checking in here. Still going with my AF life - 141 days, nearly 5 months now. I think the real milestone will be 6 months + as that will mark the longest I have gone without a drink since I was 13 (i had the odd glass of wine in the third trimester with both kids so didnt do a whole 9 months when pregnant). Still feeling really good about it. Enjoying my AF alternatives when I would usually be cracking open the cocktails/gin/wine and absolutely loving never being hungover or losing time to either drinking or recovering from it. Part of me is annoyed at myself for not doing this earlier - its nothing like i thought it would be. But hey we are here now and hopefully the kids are young enough that they wont have too many memories of drunk mummy. Or if they do, they will know that I made the choice to change

@ForeverTipsy at least you are still counting so that to me is moderating! Jesus I could drink 14 units in a night when I put my mind to it - of course, I never actually counted until I was ready to quit for a while.

@HorrorFan81 you are doing so fantastically well! I hope you’re really really proud of yourself! And I agree with you - it’s nothing like I thought it would be either. I always thought non drinkers were just a bit boring - now I know it’s actually the other way around - drinking sucks the desire and ability to do other way more exciting stuff.

today is day 1 of quitting my nightly ice cream fix - that’s gonna be a tough one for me ….

Well done to all of you!

I had a big whisky (3 units ish) on Friday night and on Sunday, both times just before bed. I definitely felt the effect, but not any hangover.

I spent all day Sunday with my daughter and my friends, playing our yearly crazy golf tournament. I was driving so a perfect way to stay sober.

A little concerned I could be backsliding, so I think I need to just keep dry dry for a wee bit and keep that sobriety habit locked in.

Shall download drinkaware and see how I do.

Think its good to keep an eye on in and have some booze free time if old habits start coming back

How you getting on this week?

One thing that is really helping me is changing my habits and finding other things to do when I would previously drink. Friday post school pick up used to be cocktail time. Got kids back, broke out the cocktail shaker. Drank for the next 8+ hours...
Now, I get the kids home, settle them down with DH and get myself out to the gym. Halfway through my workout now and feel great. Looking forward to my AF beer when I get home 🥳

I've found that changing my routine is really helpful too. I sit in a different chair and have dinner earlier, and both things helped to break the old routine of wine at 6, dinner at 8 (with more wine in between). Dinner was even later many times. Yesterday I reached Day 70, so that's 7 weeks AF now. And I've lost 7 pounds without trying at all. I always kidded myself that alcohol wasn't really fattening - probably in the same way that I kidded myself that it wouldn't really harm me and it didn't cost much...