On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining, no judging, keep on being strong, new thread autumn 2024

[Nowstrong]

@Amdone123, @Freezingfeetwarmheart , @Bigbus,@Flumpywoo , @FiveShelties , @ForeverTipsy, @Hohofortherobbers,@Jbob1976,@walliedug,

Wanted to post and old thread wouldn't let me, so took the plunge...
Please tag everyone, don't want to leave anyone behind.

Still AF here and even starting to enjoy it. Nearly 2 months. Will write proper post later..
Hope you are all doing well. Stay strong. Wet vibes, 'cos it's raining.

Yes I did! DH and I can just sit for hours talking when we have a drink in us - when I’m sober I’m not as up for that! @ForeverTipsy
Really enjoyed the ginger cordial with sparkling water tonight! Great shout!

Glad you're enjoying it! If you get a cold then it makes a great hot toddy 😃

Yes, I suppose you're right re conversation. How long have you been with your dh though? I've been with mine 17 years this year, so conversation is minimal, drink or no drink 😂 I can get jacked up on caffeine and sugar, so when I go out to a pub or club with friends I drink Coke and Red Bull...I can easily be just as annoying as my drunk friends with those inside me 😆

22 years - yes and the same regarding conversation @ForeverTipsy . We have a few 'go to' topics (many of these best avoided though really!), and I just don't have the patience for them when sober (especially when he's not). When we're both a bit tipsy/relaxed I think we just happily sit and talk general chit chat. I would very much like to have a bigger repertoire of more interesting (intelligent?) conversations - something to work on.

I've got lots I want to work on this year (well ongoing really) - as I've said before reining in the alcohol with a nice long AF stint to kick it off is definitely the starting step to pretty much all of them.

I think I may be getting a cold so that hot ginger may be needed! I haven't managed to persuade myself to start getting up earlier to get ready for work next week. Still three hours out!

Hello! I’m in the process of doing dry Jan and am starting to wonder about drinking at the weekends again. Can anyone advise whether it takes out the gains of the sober days? I managed to go dry Monday to Thursday during the autumn but am a bit shocked by the difference I’m feeling after only 10 days completely off the booze. Is weekend moderation easy to achieve or harder than abstaining?

Hello all! I have been meaning to go sober for quite some time, but it was never the right time, some of you probably know how that is. I'd have a drink every evening, and one would generally turn into 3 or 4. Not really one to get hammered, more a steady (unhealthy) daily drinker.

One of my gym friends did a Sobertember thing and I was so glad to join in and have some moral support. I was pretty successful with that, had maybe a couple drinks during the month and a one-off at a funeral, 4 or 5 drinks ( which was planned and I was ok with, and stopped straight after again)

Then just at the end of the September, DM died suddenly and all the bets were off. I drifted back to the old habits, quite easily and quickly.

So, it took a few weeks, but again I'm having a go. Had a big session on Friday and felt rough as on Saturday, had a couple glasses of wine with dinner and then again on Sunday. Since then, no booze and I'm pleased enough with that. I find the first few days are quite hard to avoid the temptation.

Glad to be here, good luck everybody.

Hello @BezMills and @AlertCat !

I find it easier to abstain for a while @AlertCat , if I've been on a run of drinking every day/nearly every day and want to break it - then I can manage moderating much better in terms both frequency and quantity. When that starts to slip again I see that as a sign I need a run of abstaining, or at least that being the aim.

I managed a 9 day AF streak before having a glass of wine on Wednesday night. Last night I had three (day off today) - paid for it (along with food I ate) with acid reflux in the night! Hopefully back on the wagon tonight...

Today is a danger day, I almost always have a drink after work at the local.

So the plan is to go down now to get the errands, before it's pub o'clock. I'm going to treat myself to a good dinner and I'll just have some AF Heineken or Erdinger.

How did you get on last night @BezMills ?

I had one small glass of wine, slowly, and didn't particularly enjoy it last night. I think the threat of another night with acid reflux has put me off. Whatever put me off I'll take it and run with it - plan now is to go back to AF for the rest of January.

@CopperGate15 thanks for asking - I body-swerved the pub and just got up the road with some AF beers. Sat in and had just those with dinner. 5 days completed

Hi everyone, haven’t posted for a while as had a lot going on in my personal life. I’m not going completely dry but going to not drink during the week. I’m really hoping that I can eventually go weeks without drinking but I do love a wine (or several) on a weekend. I hate the af wine but have had the cbd drinks which I enjoyed and felt like they relaxed me. Good luck everyone :)

Hi @idontknow1001 good luck, cutting down through the week is a good goal!

I've woken up after a solid 8 hours kip and I've completed my first week completely dry. I feel like making myself a little lego sober chip like they have in AA for the 7 days, honestly.

That’s brilliant! A full week we some! I had a horrendous sleep but hoping the more days I get through the better my sleep! Well done xx

Hello all, how are we all doing? I'm finding Dry Jan mostly ok, only had a wobble on Sunday evening when I craved a glass of red wine out of habit. But, despite having two bottles in the house leftover from Christmas, I stuck to soft drinks. Sure I'm putting weight on as swapping alcohol for food treats; doesn't help that the house is full of crap still from Christmas.

So I've decided February's challenge will be to drastically reduce my sugar intake.

I am enjoying the freedom of being 100% AF; no wondering how many units? Is it justified? Will I be able to stop at one or two? Is it weekday/weekend? Will I have a bad night's sleep and a hangover tomorrow? etc etc.

Had a dreadful night's "sleep" last night due to hormones. I know alcohol would have made it worse.

Hope everyone is doing well.

Hi @ForeverTipsy

I'm getting on ok, I'm completely dry since Monday 6th. I went out out on Saturday for a friend's birthday and just stuck to AF Erdinger. For me the challenges will be tomorrow we are going out out for curry. Luckily it's a BYO place, so I can just bring some Erdingers.

The next challenge will be the Six Nations Rugby, where I would generally go down the pub and watch the games with friends and have a coupla three drinks. I still want to go and watch the matches, but it will be a bit different doing AF 'Day Drinking'

@BezMills "a coupla three drinks" sounds familiar 😂Can you positively re-frame these social events as personal challenges that you can achieve, and feel proud of yourself? (sorry if that's patronising). That's what I do. Focus on the positives, how I'll feel after, maybe treat myself to a reward of some sort when I achieve my goal. But I'm wired that way; appreciate not everyone is. I'm not into sport, but love clubbing. Went a few times last year; once til 2am, and a couple of day raves. Did a couple of them AF (opting to be designated driver helps) and it was so empowering and liberating to enjoy the music, the atmosphere, the dancing, spending time with good friends and having a laugh without the booze. A different experience, rather than "less than" because I wasn't drinking.

These are lifetime habits we are trying to break. Remember that "Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in, day out".

Anyone follow accounts like Sober Flourish on Insta? Love some of the reminders on there:

Well, I'd not had a drink since the 28th December until last night.
Hadn't specifically told anyone I was doing Dry Jan, I was just not fancying alcohol.
Enjoyed my evening last night, wasn't a heavy one & feel fine this morning. But I do feel a bit disappointed in myself that I've not managed to make it through the month 🤷🏼‍♀️.
Hope everyone is OK!

I find the main thing is not worrying about what's done, and just go on forward.

I went out in the afternoon and had 4 rounds of drinks with my friend over 3 hours. Drank the bar out of Erdinger 0 then finished with a Guinness 0.

Good luck everyone

Yes, you're right.
I'm not beating myself up about it, which is a change from my usual post drinking mindset! So that's a win.
I didn't go overboard & am happy about that.
Just a bit meh about the fact I've failed at the Dry Jan. But hey ho!
Also that'll be me off alcohol again until my next social occasion, and I've none planned so it's not too bad.

Typically haven't been on here for a while as breaking dry January has meant that I have had a drink almost every day since. Not loads but at least a drink every day apart from Tue. Time to try something else then - not drinking on a work night + one night of the three non working nights. As I have had a drink on Thu (two) and last night (several) that means not drinking from now until Thu as I work Mon-Thu...

You can do it! I'm going out out for curry with friends. Luckily it's a BYOB so I'll come with my own 0 lagers

Well done @BezMills ! My dh tried a 0% Heineken this evening and said it was just like the real thing. I wish I liked beers and lagers! I was a cider and wine drinker and don't like the 0% versions as too sweet. By the way, I just edited that last like from "I am a cider and wine drinker" to the past tense (feeling cocky...!).

Endured an afternoon/evening with my family (most people drinking). Lots of us at the curry house so manager offered us a round of Baileys on the house. DH had his (only a shot glass) but I gave mine to my sister. Having an app for accountability and not wanting to lose my 'streak' on there for a shot of Baileys helped me stay strong.

Also reflecting on how normally I'd have come home and sunk a bottle of wine, but actually I've been more present with my kids (they're older and a good laugh). Looking forward to another hangover-free Sunday tomorrow.

Well done to all those moderating, esp whilst socialising...it's hard! Just gotta keep trying.

@ERN79 I've been doing Dry Jan since 2004 and some years I've had one or two days off during the month. 28, 29 or 30 days out of 31 is still amazing. Feel proud!

I haven't been on here for a while, purely because I've been drinking too much! Nothing silly where I've made a fool of myself or felt really rough the next day, but I'm not happy with the amount of yellow days on my app (the AF days). I've been away one weekend, then it was my DHs birthday weekend. Next month I have too many nights out planned and going on holiday, so I don't feel like I have the chance to moderate as much as I would. But that's an excuse, I don't HAVE to drink at all of these. So I'm just going to not drink on the days that aren't planned nights out, so that I can get a dry run during the week. This week I'll have 4 AF days in a row, which I'm pleased about.

Well done to those of you doing dry January, you are doing v well! And if you break it one day, then don't worry you can get back on it. It's still better than not abstaining at all

Read through the thread and you’re all doing so great!

i am on day 3 AF after decades of drinking too much for my own good. Initial goal is to be AF Monday to Thursday and to try to moderate drinking at weekends (only ever drink in the evenings but way too much!) currently around 1/2 bottle of red a night. Wondering though if this will be achievable or whether I need to go for a month or two before drinking again? Any thoughts? Can’t imagine it’s easy drinking at weekends then having to reset every Monday!

Am finding it difficult until around 9pm especially in the thick of winter…. Sleep is terrible and like many others, I don’t feel any better for not drinking. Hoping to get swept along in this journey with all of you.

In the past I've found it really difficult to break a habit of daily drinking while still having it at the weekend. It seems to just bleed into the supposedly AF days and I didn't have any success with that. It's too easy for Thursday to get a promotion to Honorary Weekend Day, and so on!

I've decided this time to just take a good break from it and then maybe see if I can be an occasional drinker eventually.

I haven't had a drink since Sunday 5th, and I've not put an end date on it. I'm just going to keep going for now definitely until March, and maybe beyond.

Good luck to all of us!