Day 1 or 1000 all welcome on the tulips and snowdrops thread 🌷

[AFmammaG]

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/alcohol_support/4930949-tulips-snowdrops-and-another-day-1?page=40&reply=134961706

Ladies I’m making this new thread as we’ve gone up to 993 posts on the other thread and I need to link it before we fill up!

Will post a proper into later.

Seconding (thirding) what has been already said. That yearning does go. It's the only reason I haven't had another drink so far, because it's easier not to yearn, than to have a drink and started yearning again.

I am considering having another drink again though. Not yet, but at some point. I've realised this probably isn't me forever. But it has reset how I view alcohol forever. I don't think I will ever want to drink alcohol like I previously did - which wasn't problematic - it was just irritating to me.

A little musing as I try to work it all out in my head nearly six months in.

@TimesaChangeling its very hard to keep the exercise going when you are staying in hotels. That’s really tiring by itself. Well done on not having any booze. I struggle most when there is no one to hold me to account.

I think of the first 7 days as survival mode. You just do what you need to do to make it through the week without breaking.

I see the next 90 days as recovery mode. Rediscovering who you are and what makes you happy.

Hopefully after that it’s maintenance mode. Not drinking is the new normal and you start to feel real benefits from all the things you do instead.

Morning all, it’s quiet here this week… hopefully that’s a good sign that everyone is doing well.

I’ve joined a weight loss thread! Initially just for June and July, I’m still focussing hard on that 7lb goal. Got an exercise class booked tonight.

My evening out tomorrow was cancelled by my friend and rearranged for later in the month so I’m quietly relieved about that. Will pound the treadmill tomorrow night instead 💪

Good morning @AFmammaG

Good morning all!

I think I'm at 7 weeks AF now. The time is just blurring (which I think is a good the thing).

I've noticed my eating habits have totally changed. The first couple of weeks I was mainlining chocolate . The drive to do that gradually wore off, and now I'm not snacking or really that fussed.

WHERE HAS THIS VERSION OF ME BEEN??

I've got a big work do today and the feeling of just going to my wardrobe and choosing what I want to wear, versus what just fits, is just bloody delightful.

I am conscious that this time has felt 'easy' for me so that's on my mind. I need to keep on the thread - you guys are my support 💕💕💕

Been a ridiculously busy week. I'm looking forward to a bath and an early night.
Horrible weather. Have a stupid cold. Always have aches in my back and shoulders with a cold, hopefully a soak in the bath will help.

Definitely cutting junk food when we get bath from our holiday. Belly is expanding and I'm only comfortable in leggings.

@AFmammaG good luck with the 7lbs!

Day 16. I’ve lost 4 lbs and people keep telling me how good I look.

Just checking in, still going and I'm 2 weeks away from 6 months no alcohol.

Honestly, I'm feeling really good. Shit is still happening, I'm going through a restructure and potential redundancy at work, I'm a few lbs heavier than ideal, life is still life but honestly I am so happy. It hasn't been like this all the way through, but honestly every challenging situation is made much easier by the fact I have no hangover and am not desperately trying to negotiate with myself over going to get a bottle of wine.

Lots of love and solidarity to you all, I catch up on the thread every day and it's so so helpful.

@IncognitoUsername congrats on the weight loss! I find it always spurs you on when other people notice the difference!

@TeeNoG Nearly 6 months AF, that is an incredible achievement! It is so comforting to hear how good you are feeling and how challenges are seen and dealt with in such a different light without the booze! The checking in definitely provides that safety net, with a little accountability…

I am just over 10 weeks Alcohol free. Largely I am finding it my new normal and I am enjoying the new version of myself. There is still a little longing here and there. The sunny afternoons where a cold glass of rose would have gone down a treat, the anticipation about my upcoming holiday and birthday which will both look very different now- for the better I am sure. My husband has had a few nights out recently (he’s not a big drinker at all) and I must say there is a huge sense of relief that I do not have to experience that awful hungover feeling anymore!

Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend :)

Lovely updates! Thanks for the messages, I think I forget people are reading but maybe not posting because they actually are doing well 😊

I used to not post when I was drinking! Probably the shame.

Well done on 7 weeks @NextPhaseOfLife it sounds like you’ve lost some weight! I must admit although the scales aren’t shifting, I wore an outfit today I haven’t worn in ages and I felt pretty good! Stomach is so much flatter.

@CoffeeLover90 my back has also been aching a bit. I put it down to all the exercise I’ve been doing but it might actually be the cold.

Well done on the 4lbs @IncognitoUsername that’s awesome! I have eaten much better this week, I’m hopeful for Saturday weigh in.

@TeeNoG sorry to hear about the uncertainty at work. Hope things stabilise for you soon. You are right. Life is easier without alcohol.

@Gratitude24 I still have the longing on occasion too. It takes a lot of reaffirmation not to give in. I also feel that relief in the morning.

Hello all 👋🏼. I always read the previous posts and intend on commenting or congratulating and then my mind just gets discombobulated.

Really inspiring to see all the week/months long sobriety people are getting.

I ended up buying a bottle of wine last night, and after drinking that I had a few more beers and really REALLY wanted to have more. Then this morning I felt fine and it somehow justified it in my mind. Then the afternoon hit and I got cranky and lethargic.

Wish I could flip a switch and stop this hellish merry go round.

Hi all. I am here checking in on you all and quietly cracking on with the various challenges life is throwing at me but managing not to break - am on day 285 today!

My alcohol habit however has currently been replaced with eating and AF drinks habits so I need to address this now as the weight and bloating I lost in the early days is coming back. I need to get back to low carbing and fasting but it feels like a step too far at the moment.

So glad to see this lovely, no judgement community continuing to lift each other up! Welcome to all the new members and well done to @AFmammaG for keeping this going. It was such an important resource for me in the early days! Sorry for not tagging everyone.

I'll admit I've gone radio silent because I've had a drink. I haven't gone overboard but have drank on about 4 occasions. I lost my pet and it's not an excuse but I've been so low. But the alcohol hasn't helped! Massive well done to all you Troopers on here though!!

Morning all! I’m a bit sore this morning after last nights exercise class, I think I overdid it! Keep thinking about those 7lbs 🤣

Fantastic day count @BoilingHotand50something! I feel like I’ve been chipping away for that long… as @SadMama87 says, it can feel a bit like a merry go round. The good news is, you can turn the corner if you keep at it. I absolutely feel like I have, hence now being able to look at other areas. Good luck to you both with your goals.

Friday night. My dinner has been cancelled (much to my relief). Not quite ready for that step and focussing hard on being in a good place for the start of the summer holidays.

@Shiningout oh so sorry to hear that, such a difficult time. Completely understand falling back to it as a coping mechanism. Take some time out and grieve 💕

I hate going to the shops on a Friday night. Alcohol everywhere and on offer. I must admit I thought about it.

Thought about my weigh in tomorrow instead and the fact I had planned on a run tonight and managed to resist. Whilst it is getting easier, I don’t like the thoughts. Will they always be there?

I did my run, first 5k in ages and I did it in 35 minutes, which feels pretty good. My breathing is much more even now I’m not smoking. That’s a definite win.

Hope everyone else is ok tonight.

@AFmammaG well done on your run! And well done for swerving the booze. I've got much better at squashing any thought of drinking very quickly - it does get easier. And you can always avoid the shops on a Friday if it helps.

@Shiningout I'm really sorry about your pet. Don't feel you can't post here 

@SadMama87 honestly, I've been there. Keep going. You can do it, keep posting, join some sober groups on social media etc.

@BoilingHotand50something congratulations on your day count! You can tackle the eating, just do it when you are ready.

@Gratitude24 Congrats on over 10 weeks!

I've had some positive news on the work front but am keeping myself calm and focused until everything is confirmed. I need to focus on my sleep this week, it's awful. I've got so used to having an amazing sober sleep, but stress has me all higgledy piggledy and scrolling at midnight.......

Ah well, back to day 1 for me.

I knew last night was going to be hard, I had a night out planned ( dinner and theatre) and I gave in and had a couple of glasses of wine.

But I didnt go overboard, so I'm trying to see this as a blip rather than a failure.

To everyone on this thread, your posts are so inspiring its whats keeping me going.Thank you.

Todays a new day.

@Overthewater52 don’t feel too bad about the blip. When I had mine in May I could have very quickly reverted to old ways… so glad now I didn’t. 15 days into June and completely dry.

@TeeNoG is it the stress keeping you awake? Have you tried making your sleep space a device free zone? I’ve been reading lots about too much screen time and it’s one of the suggestions. I’m trying to reduce my kids screen time but it’s really hard keeping them occupied without it 😬

I weighed in today and I lost 1.6 pounds, which brings my total to 2lb in 2 weeks. Will keep on with the water, fruit and early nights. I’m trying really hard to say no to extra snacks and keep up the exercise. It takes ages to change mindset from depriving myself. Same with wine right? I watched a video on 100 calorie portions and it was so enlightening, especially when they compared a fun size snickers against strawberries. Really trying to fill up on good food.

Hello all, hello @Overthewater52

Sounds like you did really well to me. I bet in the 'old' you, a blip could have slid into a binge. It didn't - good progress 🙏🏻

And posting here - also excellent progress! Easiest thing to do is go into fuck it mode. That's a really tough place to be.

Keep posting, keep following the wise words of @AFmammaG

I'm 7 weeks AF now and loving it. It doesn't happen overnight, its journey (wanky word but it is!).

Excellent news about the weight loss, @AFmammaG , especially great as you don't have much to lose so it's always slower.

I remember realising that my 4 bottles of wine a week (or more) meant around 3000 calories just on the - not including the ice cream, crisps, shit food it led too.

Even though I thought my main meals were healthy, was consuming AT LEAST 9 days worth of calories every week. No wonder I got bigger and bigger.

@TeeNoG thanks. I don’t have social media so this is my online support system for now. I have a therapist too who is very chill about me and my drinking. She encourages me to understand the “why” instead of focusing on how much I drink. She also reminds me “not everything is pathological” 😂.

I drank a bit last night while cooking dinner and poured myself a glass of wine to have before bed which got forgotten about. Pretty unusual for me to be honest!!

Felt good this morning. Got some gardening done and now I’m nursing my baby down for a nap.

One questions friends from over the pond- what is a helter skelter? My littles are obsessed with “Steve and Maggie” and he sings about it while at a playground.

@SadMama87 it’s a slide! Usually found at a fairground, it goes around the outside of a building and you usually squash yourself into a sack to go down it!