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Alcohol support

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16 year old DD drinking problems

76 replies

annierodgers1 · 31/03/2023 16:40

I’m sorry that I keep talking about my DD but right now she is going through a lot and turns out it is too much for me and DH to handle.

DD likes to drink a lot, and when she does she drinks too much she blacks out. Once we have had to take her to the hospital as she was threatening to kill herself. At this point we all ( DH and our 3 other children) feel absolutely helpless and cannot seem to find ways to help her as she is experiencing too many problems at once. She currently attends CAMHS and has been for the past year or so. They seem to help her but she lies to make herself seem better when we all know she is not stable and hasn’t been for a while now. We do not know how or where she acquires the alcohol but it is very worrying as she could be doing anything to get it. Please help!!

OP posts:
annierodgers1 · 31/03/2023 23:25

I only bought her wine before I knew any of her problems and knew about her getting alcohol her own way!!!

OP posts:
annierodgers1 · 31/03/2023 23:26

I only bought her booze before I knew about her getting alcohol herself!!!

OP posts:
annierodgers1 · 31/03/2023 23:28

Her friends are having these parties, I do not supply her with booze anymore as I only recently found out about her drinking problems. I have to let my my year old DD live her life as I feel trapped to keep her inside the house as all she does is argue with me if I don’t let her out then she ends up going out anyway.

OP posts:
annierodgers1 · 31/03/2023 23:29

Please read my replies to other people!!

OP posts:
annierodgers1 · 31/03/2023 23:32

Don’t you dare even say that. Me and DH are trying so hard to help our DD. We have never been in a situation like this before or even heard of it from anyone else. We are trying our best and the least you could do is try and support us rather than being a dick and saying comments like that. Learn some self respect. At least try and give us advice rather than saying that. Extremely disappointed in this comment and in you.

OP posts:
monsteramunch · 31/03/2023 23:39

It's hard to know which posts you're responding to OP. I was simply pointing out that your post re buying her booze sounded like an ongoing thing still happening which is why it concerned and shocked people. If that's not the case, that's not the case - I just thought it useful to show why people thought it was.

Have CAHMS got a plan in place for the next few months that includes any sort of progression or is it still in very much a day by day phase? Do you feel they are keeping you abreast of their thoughts enough?

annierodgers1 · 01/04/2023 00:33

Sorry if my reply had triggered many people about me buying booze for my DD once a fortnight but this is not an ongoing thing anymore which i would like to point out. CAMHS have tried to help but she is not listening to any of it which really upsets us all and she is not taking in to the fact she is also not helping herself.

OP posts:
OverCCCs · 01/04/2023 00:41

Why is it that these hard-to-believe posters never know how to quote previous comments? It’s just a chain of replies from OP referencing unknown PPs.

monsteramunch · 01/04/2023 00:44

OP you've accidentally included your DDs name in your last post so I've reported as MN are usually pretty good about removing identifying details if asked.

Andanotherone01 · 01/04/2023 07:33

Who are you talking to? When you’re calmer, try reading your posts back and you will realise that you aren’t exactly covering yourself in glory.

AHelpfulHand · 01/04/2023 07:49

Are you still buying her alcohol every 2 weeks, or have you stopped?

aroomwithaperfectview · 01/04/2023 07:54

Hi OP. I tried to PM you but didn't manage to on the app. PM me anytime if you wish to. I've been in your shoes but I'm not ready yet to post about our circumstances on a public forum.
Wishing you strenght. Please take care of yourself too.

MrNook · 01/04/2023 08:04

You need to click "quote" or @ the user you're responding to as we can't tell
Who you're talking to

Rainbowqueeen · 01/04/2023 08:07

I would start by contacting Al-anon. They provide support to families of alcoholics. You need support for yourself as much as her.

It’s good you are no longer buying her alcohol. I would encourage any other interests she has and try and spend quality time with her. Compliment her on her positive qualities Try and make her feel good about herself.

Wishing you well

Changeau · 01/04/2023 08:14

I mean the OP has explained a few times niw that she bought the alcohol before she knew of the problem, but by all means keep laying into her 🤷‍♀️

I hope you get this to a better place OP. Do you have a partner?

YukoandHiro · 01/04/2023 08:17

Sorry OP, you lost me at buying your 16 year old bottles of wine when you already know she has a problem. At 16 the only safe amount is about half a glass of wine with a large dinner.

Massive problem there. If I knew you IRL I'd call social services over that tbh.

MrNook · 01/04/2023 08:22

YukoandHiro · 01/04/2023 08:17

Sorry OP, you lost me at buying your 16 year old bottles of wine when you already know she has a problem. At 16 the only safe amount is about half a glass of wine with a large dinner.

Massive problem there. If I knew you IRL I'd call social services over that tbh.

She's said 3 times it was before she knew she had a problem

HeidiWhole · 01/04/2023 08:26

OP she is is clearly self-medicating because of her depression. I also parent a child with poor mental health and I know how utterly devastating and incredible difficult it is. Your DD needs better help from CAMHS for her MH - what are they doing for her?

Villssev · 01/04/2023 08:39

annierodgers1 · 31/03/2023 18:03

I only buy her alcohol (echo falls) around every two weeks for parties, but only when she attends parties as I don’t like the thought of her drinking in the streets as it is extremely dangerous.

You say that is no longer the case?

well in this post, it very much sounds like you’re talking in present tense

chocolateisavegetable · 01/04/2023 09:17

You could ask the school to refer you to the Early Help Hub for support, or self-refer. Mental health, substance use and NEET are enough criteria that you could be eligible for help under the Supporting Families programme.

Changeau · 01/04/2023 09:31

Villssev · 01/04/2023 08:39

You say that is no longer the case?

well in this post, it very much sounds like you’re talking in present tense

She's said several times that was before she realised the extent of her drinking...

Villssev · 01/04/2023 10:25

Changeau · 01/04/2023 09:31

She's said several times that was before she realised the extent of her drinking...

Yes but would only make sense if she’s only realised the extent of the drinking… yesterday!

annierodgers1 · 01/04/2023 14:25

Oh my I’m so sorry I didn’t realise, I was too stressed and accidentally included her name.

OP posts:
annierodgers1 · 01/04/2023 14:26

MrNook · 01/04/2023 08:04

You need to click "quote" or @ the user you're responding to as we can't tell
Who you're talking to

Thankyou for telling me this!!! I wasn’t aware

OP posts:
annierodgers1 · 01/04/2023 14:27

AHelpfulHand · 01/04/2023 07:49

Are you still buying her alcohol every 2 weeks, or have you stopped?

I have stopped.

OP posts: