Alcohol free in 23

[DancingSober]

Hello!

This is the thread for doing a whole year alcohol free beginning tomorrow (although some have started a bit early).

This isn't a moderation thread, so it isn't for cutting down. It's absolutely no alcohol for the whole of 2023.

That said, slip ups happen and I will not be throwing anyone off the thread if they have a blip, (or several blips), but please don't post if you're planning to have a few drinks here and there, as it may affect people who are struggling to remain AF but want to.

Tagging everyone from the initial thread:

@SerialMover
@Metalhead
@nancydroo
@blondie87
@TooSunny
@Preparedforjobnottolast
@thenewaveragebear1983
@limitededitionbarbie
@afaloren
@hashbrownsandwich
@Wantmyownbed

I think that's everyone, but please join if you want to (it's open to everyone) and huge apologies if I have missed anyone with my tagging.

Welcome back @Coppergate2 ! I had that flat feeling a week or so ago, but it seems to have improved a bit lately. I think when we finally get into spring/summer and I can get out more, it will help as well, I hate being stuck indoors all the time.

We‘re having a bit of a nightmare weekend with DD2. On Thursday she was quite poorly with a high temperature and sore throat, but seemed much better by Friday morning. However, in the evening we noticed a fine pink rash all over her chest/tummy and back, and her tongue looks exactly like the pictures of strawberry tongue you find on the NHS website under scarlet fever. So, I rang 111, and after waiting for ages for call backs from various people, eventually ended up in urgent care yesterday afternoon. The doc there said it’s just a virus and sent us home again! Now, I normally trust the medical professionals over Doctor Google, but her tongue just looks so much like a strawberry tongue to me that I wouldn’t feel comfortable sending her back in to school tomorrow. We tried to get seen at a different urgent care today, but they said we’d have to go to A&E at the local hospital as urgent care wouldn’t be able to give a different diagnosis (not sure how they can say that without even seeing her, but hey ho). So, DH has now taken her to A&E for a second opinion, and I’m feeling guilty for potentially wasting NHS resources and being one of those neurotic parents who think they know better than the doctors…

Thanks @Metalhead !

I hope your DD gets better very soon - must be worrying, especially when you think her symptoms are being dismissed potentially preventing her from getting the treatment she needs to recover quickly.

I think you're right to get a second opinion, @Metalhead . You don't want to take chances with that kind of thing.

Hey all! I'm doing well. Day 55 here and only very minor cravings that I can easily talk myself out of.

Conversely, I'm not looking forward to spring/summer in that sense, as there's always more outings and get together where sitting in the sun with a glass of wine seems a very attractive option. But I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

I've bought some Heineken 0.0 in case, but I haven't got around to tasting it yet.

@Coppergate2 not too great here.

I had one glass with Sunday lunch last week, went for dinner with my friend Wednesday and had 2 glasses. Felt in control and fine.

Had some bad news Friday, drank a bottle of wine at home. Felt crap Saturday and reminded myself that for the few hours I felt 'better' (numb) when drinking, I paid the price the next day.

So feeling positive. Have an Xmas party in a few weeks that has been rearranged a few times. I'll have a couple of drinks then if I fancy it but for my mental health through this tough time I need to not do what I did on Friday!

@HappyHealthy23 you're doing fab!

@Metalhead I hope you're DD is ok ❤️

I'm sorry to hear you've had bad news @onelife22. We'll have to pool our ideas together of things that help soothe the mind other than the poisoned chalice of alcohol. It's a hard change to make.

I was thinking a couple of days ago that when I was at uni it seemed second nature for us to encourage flatmates to go out for a run (or at least a walk together) when one of us was down/f*cked off/working though bad news. I used to ride my bike whilst my flatmate, who had recently lost her father, poured her heart out to me was running (she was very fit - I couldn't keep up if we both ran). Yes, we went out and got drunk but it wasn't our solution to life's problems. I wonder when all of that changed? I'm definitely not fit enough now for it even to be an option.

Well done @HappyHealthy23 ! Yes, I think there will be more temptation coming our way in the spring/summer. I'm really ready for the spring now though. Hope the Heineken tastes good! I'm trying to associate wine and sun with a headache, or in fact just wine full stop.

How is your DD @Metalhead ?

Thank you all, the doctor today agreed that it’s most likely scarlet fever and DD2 is now on antibiotics, so I’m feeling very relieved.

I've discovered a nice new drink this weekend: it’s called Anon Bittersweet Aperitif, and mixed with tonic or AF sparkling wine it tastes very much like an aperol spritz!

What a relief @Metalhead - hope the antibiotics start working quickly and your DD is back to full health soon.

Drink sounds good! Another one to look out for!

I've decided to do my first weigh in of 2023 tomorrow. It won't be good but I need to face up to it and start making some other changes now...

@Metalhead So glad your DD got the antibiotics, you must feel relieved.

I had drinks last Saturday, and it took me until Friday to feel mentally better. It was the wake up call I needed in order to fully accept that I need to go back to 100% sobriety. I had 2 years, I can do it again.

Other than that episode, I've been feeling good. Eating better, getting more exercise in, reading more. I feel very positive and relieved I've stopped wondering if I should aim for moderation or sobriety.

Thanks Coppergate. I have let the exercise slip the last week and a half too so think that's the mistake I made as I'm much more motivated when exercising.

I felt so awful on Saturday so I'm very certain I'm not going to be turning to the wine for comfort again.

Sounds like a great re-focus @TeeNoG !

I stepped on the scales this morning after not WI for months. It is really bad. I have gained 11 lbs since the end of October (and I really needed to lose weight then too). That has become a major focus now and alcohol definitely has no place in sorting that out.

@Coppergate2 well done for braving the scales. You can make the changes you want and feel fantastic.

Hi @Coppergate2 and everyone. Silence from me is usually a bad sign. I had an all inclusive holiday and just couldn’t resist. I haven’t shaken this mindset of being sober = being deprived.

I’m actually on day 1 again but the real stat is 48/58 dry days. I woke up this morning determined to do a dry March. I’m not beating myself up about drinking in Feb. I guess I knew I would on my holiday.

I’ll be really happy if I can do the whole of March because then I will have made progress on this time last year, when I broke in Feb and never stopped. Will also be doing a weigh in on the 1st. Not looking forward to that after stuffing myself silly on holiday.

@Metalhead hope the antibiotics kick in soon and your DD is feeling better.

@HappyHealthy23 well done on 55 days! What a run!

@onelife22 sorry to hear that you are having a tough time. Hope things improve.

I saw @DancingSober hasn't been back to update. I hope all is well for you.

Thank you @TeeNoG - I'm logging on MFP today, a plan will follow...

Exactly my thinking @NoTimeForWine - it is all part of the journey towards where we want to be, no regrets and a determined start to March.

Yes, hope you're well @DancingSober - miss you on the thread.

Yes, two months almost completed! Feeling
good.

Hi everyone, the thread went quiet for a while but I am still going. Will be two months sober tomorrow!!!

Sorry about your DD metal head. I hope she feels better soon.

I know I can’t moderate, and actually find that much harder than not drinking at all. It just takes up too much of my limited brain power.

I think some of my friends are getting a bit tetchy about it now. I turned down a big boozy weekend away because that’s genuinely all that group will be doing. It just seems like such a waste of money to me now.

Nearly 4 months here, delighted with myself. It feels very easy now, it's like the default setting rather than the new thing requiring willpower. Good luck to all those getting back on the wagon again.

Well done @JosephFrancis , @rothbury and @WithFlamingLocksOfAuburnHair!

Sounds like a wise decision Rothbury... a whole weekend of nothing much other than drinking doesn't sound like much fun at all.

Glad it is all feeling so natural now Flaming - that has to be the ultimate goal, not having it because we just don't want it and have much better things in our life to soothe and entertain.

@NoTimeForWine and anyone else wanting to start over in March...have you looked at the Annie Grace 30-day experiement? I did it last year and found it really helpful in changing my mindset.

@JosephFrancis🙏<- I'm going to pretend that's a high-five. 😎Two months for me tomorrow too! I'm determined to keep going through March. DD's birthday is at the end of March and her parties usually slid into being boozy in the evenings. This year I am going to sip my Heineken 0.0 instead and be fully present for her.

I feel like I’m also slowly turning a corner and getting to a point where my default thinking is no longer “wine“, like @WithFlamingLocksOfAuburnHair said. From my previous sober streak I know that it takes a while to break that habit, so I’m pleased with my progress. Day 61 today and no thoughts of drinking!

I saw an advert for 'sober spring' last night, by alcohol change uk. It's a commitment to stay sober from 20th March to 20th June. I think I'll sign up, it will be a good focus.

alcoholchange.org.uk/help-and-support/managing-your-drinking/sober-spring

That's a good idea @TeeNoG - I like the fact that you can actually sign up for it and be part of a community.

I came across it mid-Jan when I was looking for as many sober month names as I could, and the promptly forgot about it of course...just dragged them back up into my new username...

January Dry January
February Fast February
Lent Leave it out for lent (22 Feb - 6 Apr)
March ?
Spring - Sober spring (20 Mar - 20 Jun)
April Angelic April
May No way May/Mocktail May
June Jack it in June
July Dry July
August Avoid it August
September Sober September/Stoptember
October Go Sober October/Sober October (Stoptober is smoking?)
November No Bender November
December Drycember

Despite having those few drinks in Feb I don't look back on them as something that I enjoyed - just confirmation that I don't really want to drink. Also, that my 'all or nothing' mindset is fading. Now to apply that to my eating patterns...

I'm away this weekend (for a party - husband's friend/colleague & will know next to no one) and I was quite relieved when DH mentioned yesterday that another friend/colleague is going and bringing his wife who doesn't drink, who he also thinks I'll get on with. He actually said it in the context that they've offered us a lift back to the hotel (as he is assuming I'll drink I guess). I'm now looking forward to it much more (I was looking forward to exploring the area before and afterwards anyway but now the party feels less like something to just get through).

@Coppergate2 that's great news about having a sober buddy at your party, have a fabulous weekend away!

I agree about not enjoying those few drinks - I didn't even want the ones I had, it just seemed easier to have them than not. The good thing is it's really focused me.

Happy International Women's Day, fellow AFers!

How's everybody doing?

Day 66 here and I haven't missed alcohol at all lately. Yesterday I made Boeuf Bourginon with some wine I'd bought over Christmas/New Year for cooking. I'd opened it mid-January (a 3l box) and really wasn't sure if it would still be ok for cooking with, but I also really didn't want to try it to check! Anyway, the Bourginon seemed to be fine - it was simmered for several hours - even though the smell of alcohol made me feel a bit sick at the start.😁

Hi @HappyHealthy23 and happy International Women's day to you, and everyone else too!

Sounds like you're doing great!

I feel like my relationship with alcohol has changed a lot. It doesn't even cross my mind to have alcohol most days and I don't ever want to go back there. This is much better.