The Freedom Thread (Continued) - Enjoying the positives of an alcohol free life *Title edited by MNHQ*

[BunniesBunniesBunnies]

Hello all,

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

I hope to see many familiar names on this thread, and some new ones too! We always welcome anyone to share their feelings, ask questions or simply “check in”🙂

I’d also like to thank @Breathmiller for hosting the last thread (and to ask for your forgiveness for shamelessly stealing your thread title😳) - Thank you @Breathmiller 💐

Thanks all!

Bunnies

Congratulations @WobWib! 🎉

Thanks for the congratulations!

Best bits have been dancing sober, no beer fear or shame, sleeping really well, losing weight and feeling alive rather than numb and fuzzy.

I am sure there are many more. I just cant believe it took me so long to do it.

@WobWib fabulous -well done!

Checking in, having a bit of a wobble today, probably cos it's NYE.

Massive congrats to @WobWib and of course to @Drybird2020 for her two year milestone!!! Extra special because you started these threads and inspired so many of us. Hope you had a lovely restful holiday.

@Touty how’s it been going? How long have you been AF?

I am also checking in on a rather wobbly day. I think Christmas was fine as it was more about food and presents but a sober NYE has blindsided me.

My brain seems split today. One voice is saying just how awful a drink would taste and feel and actually makes me feel a bit sick and then the second voice is saying but it's NYE, aren't you supposed to and how boring will it be?

I won't drink because I won't and deep down, I don't want to. But the thought is unsettling as I have had it for ages. I think I just need to acknowledge it. Its not helped by the fact that my DP is coming to stay and he will drink all evening but I cannot make him not drink as I am accountable for myself.

Ugh. I think it's the first real time I feel I am missing out on something

Sorry for rambly self-indulgent post! Just needed to get it out

Self indulgent rants are very much allowed on here @Sunflowersinthewind! I know what you mean about NYE being very focussed on booze.

All I can say is just knuckle through. That way tomorrow you’ll feel supersmug and good about yourself. Loads of people will be drinking less in January so it will be easier. You just need to get through this one night!

Knuckling through is the way forward. I also have a black forest yule log that I am going to eat through. I have tried to be healthy but I think food will be my saviour tonight and then I can wake up all fresh and start on my many, many seeds I have to plant and have a nice walk with DS

I have been finding myself a bit tempted today. I'm feeling very low, a result of a lot of things: first day of period, my depression has reared its a good bit, I dislike NYE it just makes me sad to think of all the people I've lost and I feel like with Covid, there's little hope for next year, we've had 2 full years of its crap. I've been a rotten mum, I have chronic fatigue and I've barely been able to do anything with DD. There's some family issues (external, not DD or DH) playing on my mind and I'm just so burnt out. I find the nursery holidays really hard because I don't have the energy to do the things I need to do, plus housework, budgeting, food shopping and cooking, washings, all the house related nonsense plus keep a 4 year old happy and entertained. And because of Christmas the house is a bombsite. Cleaned it a few days ago, but it is back to square one. I just want to drown myself in a big glass of champagne but I know I will hate myself tomorrow if I do.

@stonycove stay strong. 💪🏻 Tell us why you gave up and what you’ve gained from being AF. How long have you been off it?

@doorornottodoor it's going ok thanks 2 weeks now. I have done longer stretches before.

I am now drinking an AF lager and it tastes rather good xx

Have recently started HRT and that seems to have lifted the low moods a bit too

@doorornottodoor thank you. I had a big binge at the start of December that not only made me very, very hungover, but it was just a wake up call to the fact something had to change. I've been AF for almost 4 weeks (Sunday is my 4 week mark). I have enjoyed not having a hangover and feeling like I am accomplishing something. Being AF has also helped to confront some big emotions and helped me see things clearly.

I guess I just expected to feel some sort of energy, but I just feel like I have been constantly exhausted since giving up

As always, there’s so much to think about here. The posts about the differences between the Dry January threads and here were really interesting. When I started AF I couldn’t imagine having the will power to succeed beyond a month, in fact I wasn’t sure that I could get to a week. I couldn’t imagine being permanently without alcohol through all the highs, lows and boring bits of life. It’s not what I imagined though because it’s so nice to be fully present, to sleep better, to know that as a middle aged woman on hrt I’m making the choices for me that I’m happy with. It’s definitely getting easier with time, though Christmas Day did feel a bit empty. I listened to an interesting audiobook on anxiety, and he was talking about how hard humans find it to cope with ambiguity. I can never know for sure that I won’t ever drink again, well maybe on my dying breath I will know, but not before then. All I can do is keep on not drinking, one opportunity at a time, and that takes the ambiguity out of that moment. I do know though there is a whole lot less ambiguity in my mind because of this place 💐
Thinking of everyone who is wobbling and struggling at the moment. Just a few more hours to go before a shiny new year. At least January is full of people not drinking.
Happy New Year to you all. Here’s to a hangover free regret-free new year.

@Touty that’s great well done!

@stonycove you’ve done so well. I remember the first couple of months not feeling any better. In fact I felt more exhausted as my sleep was terrible. I kept reading about people giving up and feeling much better and wondering why I felt worse! Mentally I felt better but physically worse. It just took time for me. Even now it’s definitely more of a mental thing than a physical thing as I wasn’t at the stage where it was really affecting my health yet. Stick with it. Have faith. Christmas is a hard time. I too get fed up with the dark days and the messy house. Is there help available for your chronic fatigue? That sounds hard

Happy Hogmanany to everyone!! And especially those for whom 2022 will be the first entirely alcohol free year.

It's my 2 year Soberversary today and I only just remembered! I knew it was coming up, of course, but I didn't think of it at all today. I love that it's just the way my life is now. When I do think of alcohol it is with relief that it no longer rules my life. That's what lies ahead, if you are still wading through the murky waters of the first few weeks. Keep going.

A massive squidge to all those who have been there for me, especially but not only @BunniesBunniesBunnies and @Breathmiller ❤

Congratulations on your 2 years Drybird. Amazing!

Second sober NYE. Had boardgames and dinner with Dad and DP. Fabulous night Night all. Enjoy the clear heads tomorrow.

Thanks @iamyourequal. It's great that you are here too. And @HangingOver! Wonderful to see you, and congratulations.

We've all done well lads. Here's to a beautiful 2022 with effortlessly elegant sobriety.

@Blackberryblossom Thank you - that's a helpful post. I am a newbie (Day 1) for whom Dry Jan is what I hope will be the first step to an AF life but I just can't really mentally cope with the enormity right now, even though I know from previous Dry efforts that after the first few days, if I don't drink, I don't really feel an urge to drink, but as soon as I let my guard down and think "well if I don't want to drink then obviously I dont have an issue and it's fine for me to have a few wines at the weekend" I'm back to daily drinking almost immediately. Basically, it's taken me 25 years to learn that I can't do moderation, so I have to choose AF or unhealthy levels of consumption which are starting to take their toll physically.

Looking forward to being part of this thread.

Happy new year everyone! And congratulations @Drybird2020. I thought tonight might be tough as I was with the friends that I was drinking with the last night before I decided to quit. They are not big drinkers but I thought I might feel a bit uncomfortable and anxious. I've done it though so that's the whole Xmas season done and dusted. I'm looking forward to a dry 2022 now. Hope everyone has had a good night xx

What a lovely update @Drybird2020!
@HangingOver my new year’s was one of board games too😂🤩

Wishing everyone an awesome 2022