Drinking WAY too much and need to detox - any shared experiences?

[TimeToStop]

I'm a daily drinker and have been for absolutely years. Since the start of lockdown 1 I've gone from drinking around half a bottle of wine or a couple of beers a day to now drinking 1/4 bottle of spirits, a bottle of wine and maybe also a few beers. Because I drink all the time, I don't get drunk any more, it's a steady drip feed of alcohol through the day. My sleep is appalling; up around 4/5 am after 3 hours sleep and then I need to have my first drink to steady the withdrawal.

I'm supposed to be working from home but I'm really beginning to fail in that and I am desperate to stop. I stopped in February 2019 for 3 months - it was sort of enforced as I was very unwell and in hospital for 3 weeks with an ovarian abscess. I felt so much better. Since then it crept up from a beer at the end of the day to where I am now.

I've spoken to my GP and been put in contact with my local drug and alcohol service as I'm drinking too much to safely stop on my own now. I'm scheduled to do a community detox on February 8th and I wondered if anybody here has done this and what it's like? I'm so nervous about it.

Hey OP, I've got no experience but have seen a few threads like this and there will be lots of fantastic advice coming along soon.

Xxx

I was drinking as much as you each night and read Alan Carr's Easyway to stop drinking - it really worked. Quitting and being happy to do so, like a weight has been lifted!!

frenella I have that book but I haven't read it. I will take a look at it. Did you not need to have a chemical detox to stop or did you do it through gradually reducing?

I did not detox gradually. 2 bottles of wine a night every night. To nothing. Had no ill effects at all. But I know that it can affect people differently so my advice is not medical just my experience :)

My GP and the drug and alcohol service folk have advised me not to go cold turkey. Maybe because I'm drinking all day rather than just in the evening? Not sure ...

I would listen to the advice of the professionals and do the detox with support. I haven't done this but I was drinking too much also and having almost finished dry January I can say I feel so much better. I wish you well.

Well done for accessing the support OP. Please follow the advice of the professionals and do not stop drinking suddenly, it can be incredibly dangerous. I've not got personal experience of going through a detox, but I know people who have. Are you living with anyone at the moment, or have someone who can support you during the detox?

Blueskysinjune I would really appreciate being able to talk to someone who has been through it.

I live with dh and dd (18). Dh is quite a lot older than me and he knows I will be doing this although he hasn't known just how much I've been drinking. He's not terribly supportive in general but he will be physically present for that week.

Huge well done for recognising your issue and doing something about it. Absolutely listen to the professionals. What have they suggested you do so far?
I’ve no experience of detox but stopped drinking on 18th December after a bad experience. I was meant to be moderating. My alcohol consumption was variable but most days was way over the limit. It was all about numbing, feeling fuzzy.
I see someone has recommended Allen Carr - I heard a podcast by Blinkist reviewing it and they discussed his salient points in around an hour. Some of the imagery has really stuck with me. It’s worth checking out. I’ll try find it and pop a link here.
I’ve also found Annie Grace hugely helpful. I’ve got her book ‘Naked Mind’ but only read a few chapters before someone recommended her free online ‘alcohol experiment’. A few people say she’s replicated a lot of Allen Carrs ideas. It’s been revolutionary for me. She sends an email each day with a video link and various experts discuss alcohol. Not the effects or how bad it is per se but how we get sucked in, the difficulty with willpower, the marketing etc and then she challenges us to think about it and make notes. As I say, I’ve found it has totally switched my mindset.
DH didn’t attempt dry, he still drinks, probably just a glass of wine a night and it really doesn’t bother me. We’ve a huge drinks cabinet full of spirits, a full wine fridge of whites & fizz and heaven knows how many boxes of reds. I’ve absolutely no intention of drinking any of them ever. BUT if you can have a clear out I’d recommend it as there’ll be temptation.
Is your DH planning to stop too?

Does your DD drink?
What are your DHs & DDs thoughts?

Here’s a couple of Aussie blokes from Blinkist talking about Allen Carr’s book. It’s only an hour long but will give you a taster.
www.listennotes.com/podcasts/what-you-will-learn/the-easy-way-to-control-JU3SsObnXxN/

StayingVigilant thank you. I will look at the alcohol experiment, definitely. I think the day to day side of it, once you manage to get rid of the actual physical addiction, is going to be hard.

My dd drinks very little, she hasn't been able to go out and party or anything like that due to covid. Every now and then she might have a small bottle of lager, but hardly ever and she usually leaves half of it. Which I polish off. UGH. I've told her I'm going to do the detox and she was moderately interested - teenagers!

Dh does drink - mostly beer but red wine at the weekends. He can polish off a bottle in an evening and I don't really like him much after he's had it as he gets argumentative and it's tedious. I tend to get withdrawn and weepy if I've had too much to drink in one go but I drink so regularly now all day that I don't really ever hit that 'too much' stage very much. I've told him that he will need to remove alcohol from our home during that week because it will be dangerous to drink whilst on the detox meds and having it there will just be too tempting. After that, I don't think he has any plans to stop drinking but I think I can probably deal with that because when I stopped two years ago, he was still drinking and I could ignore it.

Thank you for the link - I will have a listen now :)

And this is Annie Grace’s free ‘Alcohol Experiment’ - it’s every day for a month. My friend used a paid version (£50 I think) which gave her unlimited access to counsellors and a support group and much more than the free one. I think she still taps into it every now and then 2 years later. I’m tight so thought I’d try free one first.
learn.thisnakedmind.com/the-alcohol-experiment-registration

Ah, brilliant, thank you. Do you think I should do it now or after I've done the detox. I still have a whole 7 days of this hell to go before I can do it - needed blood tests from the GP etc. first.

Hmmmm ... the Alcohol Experiment states clearly that for someone in my situation it might not be safe. I think I will keep the link bookmarked until mid-detox?

When does your week of detox start?
I started the ‘alcohol experiment’ when I’d been dry around 10 days but it would have been better to have started it before hand. I’m a little worried it may be triggering if you start during your detox as it’s focus is very much on the ‘experiment’ and people ‘experimenting’ with stopping. It’s very much about giving alcohol up for a month and seeing how that goes and what you learn from it. It doesn’t start with the notion of stopping forever although I think most people do. It’s American and they don’t seem to have Dry January or Sober October. Keep posting to let us know how you’re getting on.
Oh and get in some nice alcohol free stuff.

I’d not go cold Turkey and stop drinking until you’ve done the detox as per recommended by your GP. But you could still start listening/reading the quit lit and definitely join the ‘alcohol experiment’ beforehand. I think starting ore stopping would be better for you anyway. The first days are looking at why we drink. You don’t need to be dry to do the experiment.

Okay, thanks. I was thinking maybe it would be good to do it alongside the week of detox? So far it's scheduled for 8th February and I'm really hoping that that goes ahead. If they postpone for a week after I've got psyched up, that will be difficult.

I don’t know much about community detoxes, but I do know people who have been to rehab, and agree with previous oysters - it’s wise to detox if you’ve been advised to do so by health professionals.

Have you considered AA? It’s a bit more intense than quit lit, but it might be quite ‘holding’ for you. Lots of fellowship and support from other people in a similar situation, there will be plenty of people who’ve been through a detox, and it’s all on Zoom at the moment.

Oysters = posters

Ooh that’s true. If you’re all psyched up and it postponed! I think your idea of alongside could be good. I guess you could sign up and just have them sat in your inbox? There’s an alcohol experiment Facebook group so you could ask on there too. I don’t think you need to sign up access.
There’s also an online recovery chat that I’m sure I’ve heard @hangingover mention. I think it’s like AA but without the religious slant or ‘alcoholic’ labelling.

I think you can zoom but just listen in until you feel comfortable. I’ll try search it.

Quit lit has definitely helped me massively. I find I don't have the concentration to sit and read a book so I got an audible subscription and mainly listen to books in the car on my commute to work, or at home when I'm doing housework. I've got a lot out of the Allen Carr book, and also the Sober Diaries and Drinking (Caroline Knapp).

Thank you so much. I'm listening to the Alan Carr podcast thing now.