Hi there, I am already on this thread and am doung Dry Jan but have changed name for this post as it is about DP and not myself, so didn't want it associated with my usual username.
Is anyone dealing with doing dry Jan with a partner who adamantly and vehemently would not contemplate it and is still drinking every night? It's a little tricky. It means there is red wine in the house fot a start (my weakness, I bloody love the stuff) , and I have to listen to him pouring it (that glug glug sound!) and watch him drinking it every evening.
He is a lovely man and we have a great relationship normally, but I relaise that for years we have been not only best friends and partners but also very much drinking buddies. Of course, there have been times when one of us was drinking and the other wasn't (eg when I have been pregnant, or one of us has been ill, or doing work that precluded drinking every night), but mostly we are in the habit of drinking regularly together (used to be what might be considered a "reasonable" amount" but in lockdown has spiralled to too much, and to nearly every night).
I have also realised in the past couple of weeks, since starting to contemplate Dry Jan and then actually starting it, that he refers to alcohol ALL THE TIME. I had not noticed this as much before. When someone gets good news eg a job promotion or something like that, he always says "oh, I bet they'll be getting drunk as a lord tonight". When we can't get hold of someone on the phone for some reason, eg one of our adult children is busy in the evening and not picking up, he will say "oh, I bet they are busy getting drunk". If he gets hold of them the next morning he will go "oh, I bet you have a good hangover". (The kids can drink with the best of us on occasion but because of their jobs are very unlikly to be drinking and having hangovers during the week, same goes for many of our friends). When someone refers to having had a nice time in whatever context, eg a holiday, he will always refer to it as "drinking and partying". Nowadays, when we do a Zoom with friends or family the first thing he will say is "where's your glass of wine?". It's starting to grate, but I am holding my tongue. I don't want to seem sanctimonious after three days dry!