Less booze. More AF days. But still a bit damp. Not dry jan, but not a soggy summer. Support thread for reducing alcohol.

[Frouby]

New thread in case the other fills up while I am busy this weekend.

Did I mention I get married tomorrow? 😁

Rubbish at clicky links but sure someone clever will be along to link the last thread.

This is a support thread for those wanting to reduce the amount you drink. There is no judgement on here. We are all struggling along with our own problems and lives and looking to cut down. You might only want a couple of weekends off. Or reduce the amount of days you drink. Or the amount you drink. Or both.

Whatever your starting point and whatever your goal come and join us for friendly chat and support.

It was the 'lunchtime bum sex' that did it for me too.

How many drinks would you need to make that seem even remotely appealing?

Someone could put me attached to IV gin into a major vein and I’d still not be tempted!! Thank god I’m English!!

Frouby That is such a good sum up!
Aside from the lunchtime bum sex - I just say I'm British and we aren't really used to anything up our bum - don't forget that the French are used to having medicine via that route from an early age so it is quite normal for them - the men I've met have mostly been very attentive and good lovers who know how to please a girl
Anyway Mr Potential is coming for lunch today (kids not here) but bum sex or indeed sex of any kind definitely isn't on the menu! And it will be AF, he is another non drinker.

Anglaise, I had forgotten about French medical practices. It is starting to make me think of the late lamented Eurotrash (essential student viewing about 100 years ago).

Hope all goes well with Mr Potential. Good that he is a non-drinker, as having a drinker around you is not helpful when you're trying to stay on the straight and narrow.

Anglais - hope lunch goes well. Let us know....

Woosey well, Mr Potentiel turned out to be Mr Sait tout (Mr Know it All). I had wondered as he was a little full of himself on our first date, but when he talked about how great he was non stop it got a little boring and I'm not sure if he was completely honest about everything. On the positive side he loved my cooking - homemade vegetable quiche with green salad and moelleux au chocolat (rich chocolate cake type thing) - but not sure that it will go any further for me even if he does want to see me again which I doubt.
So no lunchtime bum sex or any other sex for that matter.
On to the next one

Anglaise, I think I will come and have lunch with you if you can cook that well . Sorry to hear about Mr Know-All. At least you have found out now...

Fail of sorts last night as a) work kicked off in the way it always seems to at the weekend, so I did a 10-hour day and was desperate for a nice cold G&T, and b) DP told me about the nice cold G&T he was having with his DS. So that was all my resolve out of the window. However, it was moderation of a sort - 3 x 40ml of Tanqueray Export (so the strong stuff). Sober enough to read by the time I went to bed, so could have been much worse. Still cross with myself, though.

Anglais, sounds gorgeous lunch..shame about him tho. Deffo onto the next one!! Let us know the next chapter.
Dion, that’s moderation for sure..on a sat night after a nightmare day too. I’d say that’s fab!!
I definitely didnt moderate!!!! Friday night we went out....too much wine!! Last night, Dh sat in garden..started on gin then hit the Viognier hard!!
Today is ds’s 21st birthday!! There’s a big festival in our town. That along with the World Cup. Ds is football mad. So Dh and ds are heading to the pub in town to watch it, along with loads others and then into the festival!! I’m taking dd’s down to festival and then hooking up with Dh and ds after football!! I know too much alcohol is going to hit me today but hey....21 years ago today I was pushing a baby out of my foof!! So think I ‘deserve’ it!!!!!!
Tomorrow will Be day 1!!!

Hey guys, wondering if I can join you? I've set up my own thread in weight loss to record that part but as from tomorrow I am going to go alcohol free for 30 days.

I'm ashamed to say that I think I may have had maybe 4/5 dry nights over the past 4 years. It's all wine and I'm very very rarely drunk just a couple every night but I really struggle with not having any.

Something needs to change I've developed anxiety, my weight is the highest it's ever been and the morning with a thick head are turning me into a shouty mum.

Flippin, welcome! We are all in our various ways in the same boat as you...

Flippin, welcome!! Will have a look at your weight loss thread....I lost 1.5st in the autumn. Then once Christmas was here I’ve put it all back on!! Need to control back!!

Woosey I hope you had a great afternoon! Sounds fun especially as England won!
Dion if you want the recipe for my choc cake it is so easy, French people always laugh at English cooking but all my friends without fail always ask me to bring that as a dessert when we have meals so I know its a good one.
Mr Potential texted me this morning so he is still interested, not sure if I am but it wouldn't hurt to see him again. Trouble is 3rd or 4th date time usually involves sex.
Hi Flippin I hope you manage to do your 30 days - I never managed that long but have been moderating for 10 months (AF in the week a bottle of wine over the weekend) and I was drinking wine every night like you before. I lost 5kg in a couple of months when I stopped and I wasn't at all overweight to start with, but I do a lot of sport. It is just a question of watching sugar intake as a lot of people tend to crave that when they stop alcohol. Good luck!

Anglais....id like your Choccy cake recipe too!! I’m useless at baking!! I can cook savoury fine but as soon as I try desert, I instantly fail!!
As for mr potential..do you fancy him in any way?? Was he nervous and therefore chatting about himself?? I ask if you fancy him because if sex is on the cards, I’d deffo need to fancy a guy.

Yup had fab afternoon!! No way was I AF or indeed moderating. Had 2 g&t’s and shared a bottle of wine with ds, Altho I’m sure I had much more than him as he was really drunk from watching football with Dh!!

Super. Met a GP other day socially and she mentioned she dropped a stone in 6 weeks just from dropping the alcohol

Fingers crossed

Blimey. Struggling with all of this...

Anglaise, 3rd or 4th date involving sex (and presumably not of the bum brigade?) I am hyperventilating. I was in love with sodding useless DP for four effing years before he kissed me. Never mind bumsex, or any sex, after three dates.

Flippin. Blimey. I would be five stone at that rate. That said, I could make up the calories by eating instead of drinking. As things stand, I don't eat much on the nights that I know I will drink. Because I am a former anorexic. FML.

6 x 40 ml Tanqueray Export here. So pissed off with myself. Work kicked off, again, and DP is having a lovely time with his DS who doesn't know I exist (even though we have been together for THREE SODDING YEARS).

Sadly, I am in a work environment where heavy drinking is the norm (hence the weird hours. Nobody effing normal works their arse off on a Sunday, while their DC stew at home watching Love Island). This does not help. We all retreat to the pub after 12 hours of being responsible adults...

Oh Dion, love is a complete shit!! If only it didn’t take over our soul hey!! He sounds like he’s being a complet dick..and deep down you know that. He’s not respecting you or treating you with the care and attention that you so definitely deserve. The fact he went quiet until you said you’d forget it is deffo guilty as charged. How you get past this I don’t know...he doesn’t sound like the talking type. I’m so sorry you have to go through this..it would definitely make me want to drink more. Sending big hugs. 🤗
As for loosing weight..when I did SlimmingWorld, I’m sure it was the lack of alcohol that made me shed the weight. Now I’m deinking heaps again, I’ve put on 1.5st since Christmas ffs!!

Morning all

Day 1 here. Fml.

Not too bad over the weekend. A few (about 3) beers Saturday afternoon. Yesterday we had friends and family over all day for watching football and a bbq. Had about 6 bottles of bud (the 300 ml ones) and a couple of g and ts later on. Had a lovely day.

Then ds woke up at 12, got in our bed, sais he had tummy ache then projectile vomited over me, the bed and the carpet while I was ushering him to the bathroom. Bleurgh.

So instead of his 3 day induction into F1 he is sat in his pants watching YouTube while I do a big pile of washing. Least the suns out to dry it.

Anglaise if he gives you the fanny gallops go for it! If not then maybe a date in a restaurant rather than a house?

Dion your one sounds an absolute knobber. Not admitting to a relationship after that long suggests to me he has another relationship he is also keeping secret. Either that or he has massive issues somewhere. Either way you deserve better.

Frouby I hope you have got through all the washing now. Projectile vomiting and the consequences of it are horrible. I remember my son when he was 2, first of all he vomited in his bed and moved to his sister's. He then vomited there and moved to my bed. He then vomited there and I put towels around him which had to be changed but were easier to change and replace regularly than sheets!
Dion you know it isn't normal that your DP hasn't told his kids about you, but it is normal behaviour for a manipulating narcissist bastard so I'm not surprised. You also know it will end in tears one day (yours not his) but love is blind so make the most of the moment!
Woosey sounds like you had a great day yesterday, so pleased for you.
Mr Potentiel has suggested lunch tomorrow which will be in a restaurant so nicely avoids the sex-on-the-third-date issue. Phew. I think I'll go even though I have another invitation it should give me an idea of if it is worth continuing or not. I think he was quite nervous and that was why he talked so much.

DAY 1 for everyone today, don't forget!
You can make my chocolate cake instead of having a drink, here is the recipe:
Pre-heat fan oven to 170°C
275g 70% chocolate
175g butter
150g castor sugar
1 dessert spoon vanilla essence
20g of flour (yes 20g, not 200g)
5 eggs

1. Melt the butter, sugar and chocolate together (I just bung in microwave for a few minutes)
2. Seperate the eggs then whisk the eggwhites in a big bowl with a little sugar until they are stiff
3. Add the egg yolks, vanilla essence and flour to the chocolate mixture.
4. Mix everything in 3. with the egg whites
5. Pour mixture into 25cm ish dish lined with grease proof paper

Bake for around 35mns, it is best served cold from the fridge.

Anglaise, thank you for the recipe! You just need to come and make it now. So Mr Potential is still in the running, then. I hope it goes well... And, yes, I know DP's behaviour is not normal (other than for someone who's very selfish). I have shed many tears over him, and will no doubt shed many more.

Frouby and Woosey, thank you for being so kind. At least I laughed about him being a knobber. He really is not the talking type. Stereotypical man in that way. And I am the opposite - I witter on endlessly and can't rest until things have been talked to death. Not with him, though.

I asked MNHQ to delete my second post last night as I feared it might be a bit outing, if any of his family are MN-ers (can't imagine they are, but who knows...)

And Frouby... Urgggggghhhhhhh. I hate vomit, and the resultant washing. I hope your DS's was a one-off. What a great start to the week.

Have to collect a DC in the car later, so will not be able to drink even if I wanted to (which I do, as I am very hot).

Ds has been fine all day. Bit ratty but I think that was down to tiredness. He fell asleep on the sofa at 6pm tho so carried him up. He has to be off tomorrow too so will only get 1 induction day at his new school. Not sure I worried tho. It's such a long way between june and September I think it's probably more unsettling than settling. If anything worries them or they don't like it they have it hanging over them all summer. Be far better to just go straight in in September imo.

All dry here. Dh had his tea and went to bed, think he felt rough from yesterdays beery bbq. I am going to have a shower shortly and go up too.

My upstairs still smells of sick tho. 🤢. Have scrubbed the carpet 3 times with zoflora and washing up liquid. Changed all the bedding including the mattress protector. Wiped the mattress with zoflora. Lit a scented candle. Put a plug in air freshner up there. Had the windows open and the fan going all day. And I know it's not me being paranoid because dd who didnt even know he had been sick complained as well. Bleurgh.

Will have to get the carpet cleaner out if it's still lingering tomorrow.

Frouby, sick is vile. My DSis threw up all over the inside of our mum's car once. Mum thought I wouldn't notice when she collected me from school. The car still stank when we sold it.

Glad to hear your DS hasn't repeated the performance, though. And I think you have a good point about inductions.

AF here thanks to driving to gymnastics (DD's, not mine). Sorely tested by DP, though.

Frouby, god you poor thing. And ds od course but clearing it ups hideous!!

Dion - club runs act as a good deterant for me too. But then when I get home I think , fuck it!! And have one!!

So I wasn’t going to drink tonight after a heavy wkend. However here I am with a weak white wine and soda. Just to get the taste!! Ds has tested me alllllll day!! Knows how to press my buttons. Also still got dd home from school. Be nearly three weeks now.

My google search history shows my last 12 hours.

How long off school for vomiting.

X school contact details.

Can I wash linen at 90 degrees.

Best stain remover for vomit on linen

Getting rid of vomit smell.

Removing vomit smell from carpet.

Can I use non bio pet spray on carpets.

Will non bio carpet spray foam with vacs cleaner.

Is bicarb of soda same as baking powder.

Best air freshner vomit smell.

Also.

Home remedies cystitis.

Can nurse dip urine instead of gp appt.

Can I use clean jar for urine sample.

Fml.

Oh frouby!! If you haven’t had a barrel of beer tonight, you deserve a bloody knighthood!! What a day!!!!!!