Not dry january. But less booze in general. Anyone else?

[Frouby]

I am posting this thread because I really want to reduce the amount of alcohol I drink.

I was going to do dry January but think that is too much for me. And when I do drink again I will revert back to bad habits.

On a normal week I would have 1 or 2 g and ts mon to thurs. Bottle of wine on a friday. Then either a couple of beers or a couple of g and ts on a Saturday night. Nothing on sunday.

Over Christmas (which started for us mid December as we had a holiday) I have drank every day. Never been drunk drunk but 4 or 5 drinks every day.

I feel fat, bloated and lethargic. I want to cut my drinking down to a couple of nights a week. Friday and Saturday. Or thursday and friday. DP also drinks most days (more than me too) and we both need to address our relationship with alcohol.

I didn't drink last night and won't tonight either. And I feel 100% better already. We get married in May and I want to lose weight and improve my health.

Does anyone else want to join this thread for support? I know there is the dry January thread but I will be drinking (probably) 2 days a week so dont want to post on there and knock any penguins off the ice.

Currently drinking ginger ale with loads of ice and contemplating a shower and a cupp of tea later with the last of the Christmas cake (diet starts tomorrow) 😁

Anglaise, I have now bought a copy. It was expensive, but if it saves me from squandering money on gin, it will be money well spent...

Am loving softplay.

Ffs.

Fml.

😭😭

Hi everyone. I’ve been reading this thread with interest as I feel that I currently have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol and should cut down or maybe stop altogether.

I drink one bottle of wine a week, maybe two if I’m stressed. Don’t go out much so the drinking is done at home and to be honest I am drinking because it helps me to relax. I like the feeling it gives initially and I do know when to stop but I’m drinking because of its effects and not because I love the taste of it. I used to open a bottle on a Friday night and that would last me until Sunday and then I’d have nothing more till the next Friday. But it has started to creep into the other days as well, just a glass to calm me down, stop me worrying so much. And that’s great isn’t it, the feeling of things not being so bad etc but the next day things are just the same. Two large glasses is usually enough for me and I’m an early evening drinker, I like to have a glass or two before dinner on an empty stomach so I feel the buzz straight away. Gives me the munchies though and I then start snacking on crisps etc. Not good for the weight. If I eat first then I don’t want to drink so that’s the answer I think.

I suffer from anxiety and I know full well the effects of alcohol on anxiety but I still do it. I’m self medicating as they like to call it. I want to get back to 4 nights alcohol free but I’m going through a bad patch at the moment so might be a struggle but I’m going to try.

Pinkcoat, there are so many of us here who could have written your post. 4 nights would be unspeakably brilliant for me. I was absolutely not going to drink tonight, but have felt so awful all day that I have had too much. However, I have just poured half a bottle of gin down the sink so I can't drink it. I must not buy it.

Frouby FML is the only response to soft play, regardless of hangover/alcohol consumption.

Athena its so easy to reach for a drink when you are feeling bad but well done on pouring the gin away.
I had one huge glass of wine last night followed by a small glass and it felt good. I relaxed, had a laugh at Ant and Dec on TV and went to bed early so was asleep by about 10. I'm going through a bit of a rough patch anxiety wise so I was awake early fretting. Probably not helped by the drink but I didn't have that much.
I am definitely aiming to go alcohol free Monday to Thurs so I will give it a go.

Am here. Had 2 halves of lager last night as we went out for tea which we very rarely do. Was in bed by 8.30pm feeling very sorry for myself still.

I think ds has passed his bug onto me. So definetly a good few AF days needed. Am mega, mega busy next week too.

In fact I am going to be very busy unti at least june. I have the year end to do for oir business, I have my own work to do, a huge allotment to start planting for, 2 ponies to turn from semi feral yetis into sleek ridden ponies and a wedding to plan and organise for May.

I definetly don't have time to waste with hangovers. DS starts full time nursery after Easter. Dp was wondering if we ought to redecorate while I have some extra free time.

Just fuck off DP. 😂😂

So yeah. AF is a priority for me.

Today I have prepped and started dinner early. We are eating about 4ish. Am having a bath after, getting my pjs on and chilling with a nice cup of tea. Then up early for work.

Frouby: quite right. You don't have time for hangovers. Early dinner helps enormously with the Witching Hour, too. I am going to try this tonight. I am now regretting having poured the gin away, but there's nothing I can do about it now. And I am NOT going to Sainsbury's Local either, because it is pouring with sleety rain.

Pinkcoat: I hope you manage your AF Monday-Thursday. My aim is not to drink alone or with the DC around (i.e. most evenings). It remains to be seen whether it's achievable.

Athena well done on tipping the gin away. I live in the French countryside and have to get in the car to go to the supermarket, nothing is open Sunday pm so no temptation. I have wine and beer and spirits in the house but don't touch them except for my one bottle over the weekend that U've just finished. Have no desire to drink more than 2 glasses, love being AF in the week and with the lighter evenings it is even easier to keep busy running walking cycling gardening outside in the 'trigger' period. Good luck with going AF in the week, you CAN do it!

Thank you, Anglaise. Have more or less got through the evening, and am going to bed early. Not tempted once I am in bed...

I've finished the last glass I'm the bottle do that's me done until Friday - I hope.
Yes early dinners for me too. If I eat first I don't want to drink so that's the plan.
Go on Athena. You can resist tonight. It's not worth a trip out in this weather and just think how good you will feel tomorrow. I've had dinner so early night for me.

I've managed AF today.

Just ate 3 cold roast potatoes and a cold yorkshire pudding tho. Was contemplating left over cauliflower cheese as well but DP came downstairs so have hid it at the back of the fridge for lunch tomorrow.

Wow you’ve all done fab tonight!!

Frouby- sorry to hear you’re feeling rough with both bug and hangover. Soft play must have tipped you over the edge!!

Athena - well done for pouring that gin away. I do that sometimes with wine when my head is telling me to not drink it but my body is crying out for it. Resist getting more. You will feel sooooo proud of yourself!

Pinkcoat - hey you are sounding strong! You seem determined not to drink too Friday, that’s great!! I’m sure you can do this!!

Well we went away for the night last night with dc’s. Went out for dinner and I drink a whole bottle of wine to myself and don’t think I even felt drunk!! Felt fine this morning apart from the moment I looked in the mirror when I got up, and a haggard wrinkly yet puffy face stared back at me!!
So.....small steps....I’ve not drink tonight. I’m immensely proud. I’m at the stage where one night off is a target. So I’m planning on being AF tomorrow too. I would fall over with shock if I can do this. Sounds so stupid but it really has got that bad!! It’s dh and dd’s birthday tomorrow and we might go out for dinner. I’ve offered to drive somewhere in order for me not to be able to drink. Then I plan on having a coffee after dinner. I never drink after a coffee so I’ll have sealed the evening. That’s my plan!!
I have to actually plan and coach myself into doing AF days currently as I’m finding it soooo easy to reach for the bottle!!

Good luck everyone this week.....you can and will succeed xx

Woosey35 offering to drive and 'sealing your night' with a coffee are great ideas! I've managed a week AF now,'funnily enough DH only noticed on Saturday night that I wasn't drinking the wine! We are away with friends next weekend, I'm planning on a max of two glasses with dinner and leaving it there (easier said than done perhaps) Thanks to this thread, I'm feeling positive for the coming week. Good luck everybody!

Excellent plan re coffee, Woosey. And your mention of puffy faces reminds me of yet another reason to try to do this AF thing.

If I'm really lucky, it will be foul weather again tonight, meaning that I will have to drive to Book Club (which in turn means, of course, that I can't drink anything at all).

Evenings seem so bloody long when you're AF, though...

Athena, I too need almost to be forced into AF. The fact I’m driving too tonight means I can’t deink. Dh has offered several times that we get a cab ‘so we can all enjoy a drink’ and I’ve said no each time!! Each time of saying no is almost as hard as not opening the bottle!!
Then......a neighbour of mine sent me quite a spiteful text (whole diff story) about me not keeping my plans etc and letting her down. (I can’t because my dd has life threatening illness which is so hard to manage and takes over a lot so my plans get changed). I really got upset by the text. If it hadn’t have been for the fact I’m driving out for dinner tonight, I most definitely would’ve poured myself the biggest gin!! These small steps are so hard. Life has struggles but I’m hoping that I can still overcome alcohol despite these struggles.

Just want to say THANKYOU all. This thread is amazing!!

Woosey, I am so sorry to hear about your DD. And about the neighbour. Ignore, ignore, ignore...

I'm very grateful to Frouby for starting this thread.

Arghhhhhhhh......dh has gone ahead and booked a cab!! Told me it’s his and dd’s bday so we should be celebrating not worrying!! 😑

Sorry about your dds illness woosey. It must be very difficult. But 2 birthdays are actually a good reason to drink. Just keep a count of units.

Difficult day here all round. Work was shitty and I had tech problems that meant it dragged on through the day.

Dp has Ds's bug. As do I but obviously it's not as bad as dps bug. He has been flopping around sighing and sneezing all night.

Ds has been a little toad all day. Including at his swimming lesson which mainly involved trying to ride his float like a piny rather than swimming.

And my friend is annoying me immensely. Her ex boyfriend is a complete waster. Drug addict, doesn't work, steals from her etc. He still lives in her house and refuses to leave. I told her to phone the police to ask them to help which she did. Then said they couldn't come because she had a dentist appointment. Sigh.

This has been going on months. Am sick of hearing her. She is her own worse enemy. She does nothing to improve her situation but expects it to get better. Then moans at me when it doesn't. I know it's a difficult situation but she is making it harder. Obviously he is to blame but she needs to take control of the situation and get it over with.

So am a grump, narky cow tonight. But remained AF! Yay me. 2 days on the trot after a 9 day bender. I say bender but it was a couple each night.

Planning AF until at least Thursday. And am off wine I think. Gin ftw!

Flipping heck frouby....you deserve a medal for today and still being AF. Sounds mega stressful. Fab!! A lot stronger than me!! Well done!! Only two more days to go hey!! 🙌🏼
Well, we got a cab. I had two gins prior to dinner in a child friendly bar, which includes games for the kids (makes it easier Arghhh). Then two large glasses of white in the restaurant. Ffs!!!!! But to be honest..and I know this is my biggest problem....but I totally needed it!! Neighbour putting me down and knocking my confidence and basically telling me I’m a failure. Daughter being sent home from school for the umteenth time as they can’t manage her, and the Hospital app from hell for her on Friday looming over me like a black cloud. Dh lovely but completely doesn’t do hospital appointments as ‘doesn’t like hospitals’. Well funny old thing, nor do I!!!!

It's no wonder we all drink more than we'd like when you write down exactly how much we all have going on each day! Managed another day AF yesterday - mind you I've been going to bed super early! Can I ask, those of you with partners. Are they generally supportive? Do they know you are trying to reduce your intake? I haven't really had the conversation with DH yet; just keep saying that I don't fancy a glass of wine.

Just remember that alcohol seems like a good fix for anxiety, stress, feeling down, but you'll drink it, you won't sleep properly, you'll feel at worst like shit at best fuzzy and tired the next day and just counting down the hours to the time you can have your next drink to feel better again. Alcohol is fine as an occasional treat but not as a remedy for resolving problems.
Stick with the AF till Thursday 'Frouby'
Hope you had a nice evening out 'woosey'

Pontious - dh can do AF no prob during the week but doesn’t encourage me. I just end up pouring a wine anyway!! But then on days I try to be good, he says things like ‘I think after the day you’ve had, a glass of wine will do you good’!!!! I deffo am less stressed once I’ve had a glass. My trouble is, I can’t stick at one. Mind you if I drink red wine I tend to only have one and sip it. So maybe I should switch to red and not continue to down the white wine, as it’s soooooo easy to do!!
Anglaise - really lovely night thanks. Regretting it this morning though..not because of hangover, as I feel ok, but because I drank..simple as that really.

So my target is now.....AF til Friday. Omg it will be a small miracle but I would be wonderfully proud!!!!!!

Arghhh I’m
Struggling now!!!!!!!!!!!! Mental day, youngest dd didn’t make a whole day at school. Then dd1 came home saying she needs to make an island (wtf) for a project at school by Thursday!!!! So I’ve just constructed an island, as you do....while cooking tea for kids and preparing dinner for dh and I to eat later. All while I’d normally be sipping my first glass of chilled white wine!! Instead I’ve made a cuppa!!! 😫😫😫😫

Come on woosey - stick with
your cuppa! I'm ok so far - but don't usually open a bottle until Thursday- so we will see how it goes. I keep thinking of how my social life will change if my drinking habits do. Some
of my oldest friendships are wine fuelled. It'll be interesting to see the reactions. I'm actually just hoping to find my 'off' button and be able to have 2 or three drinks and stop there. Right now that feels even harder than stopping all together!