Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Adoption

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on adoption.

Matthew and Ryan

109 replies

Arran2024 · 02/12/2025 09:17

These two keep cropping up on my Facebook feed. They are a gay couple planning to adopt and apparently it's really happening - next week. They post incessantly about the process and are clearly very excited, but how can social services be ok with this?

(Edited because I can't get the Facebook link to work)

OP posts:
Arran2024 · 28/01/2026 20:09

My daughter follows them on Instagram and she just showed me a post in which they claim to be taking their son on a 15 hour flight for his first holiday - to Japan apparently (maybe that's to put people off the scent,). All the comments are about making memories, tips on flying with kids....

OP posts:
Iloveagoodnap · 29/01/2026 09:32

I’ve seen a couple of recent videos about them taking the baby on a 15 hour flight and personally I can’t imagine why they want to do so. It seems quite self centred. They surely know there’s a chance the baby will hate it but they’ve decided to do it anyway. And they also must know there’s a chance the baby will scream the place down in an enclosed space full of other people who will have to put up with the screaming. But again, they’ve decided to do it anyway.

Simonjt · 29/01/2026 09:43

We’ve done long flights with ours, including Japan with our oldest for the rugby world cup. For us long flights at that age are so much easier than when they’re older, until they get to about 5/6.

Arran2024 · 29/01/2026 10:16

Simonjt · 29/01/2026 09:43

We’ve done long flights with ours, including Japan with our oldest for the rugby world cup. For us long flights at that age are so much easier than when they’re older, until they get to about 5/6.

I was thinking more about the usual advice to adopters to keep things simple at first.

OP posts:
Terew · 31/01/2026 15:43

They have just asked for questions to respond to in their next podcast.One person has suggested they say what Social Workers could learn from them (!)

onlytherain · 31/01/2026 17:08

Maybe someone should tell them that everything they do for the child, they also do for themselves. If they do not centre the child, they very likely are headed for massive problems.

Catio1 · 03/02/2026 15:02

I remember reading an article about a social media influencer family in the USA who made adopting a child a huge part of their social media presence, then when he turned out to have significant needs they felt they couldn't cope and the adoption was disrupted, which led to a lot of backlash from their fans and the mum stopped posting. I don't think combining adoption and social media influencing is a good idea. I don't even think it's a good idea with birth children tbh.

Arran2024 · 03/02/2026 15:45

They have just landed in Japan for a holiday. 15 hour flight....

Brooklyn Beckham has complained about his family monetised him - i wonder how Lincoln will feel in future.

OP posts:
IsThisTheReaLife · 04/02/2026 10:30

I have just found this thread, because the latest Matthew and Ryan story just sent me over the edge.

The timing is weird, they must have the adoption order by now surely to be taking a long flight. But they just seemed to bring him home a few weeks ago.

I know they have admitted to changing the timing, but to someone casually looking on it looks like a fantasy, which bares no resembelance to the reality.

I find it upsetting.

Arran2024 · 04/02/2026 12:34

IsThisTheReaLife · 04/02/2026 10:30

I have just found this thread, because the latest Matthew and Ryan story just sent me over the edge.

The timing is weird, they must have the adoption order by now surely to be taking a long flight. But they just seemed to bring him home a few weeks ago.

I know they have admitted to changing the timing, but to someone casually looking on it looks like a fantasy, which bares no resembelance to the reality.

I find it upsetting.

I believe he was placed last spring and they filmed everything but didn't post it - they held the material back until after the adoption order, which was in Dec. The minute they got the adoption order they started posting, including some of the earlier stuff.

I think they held back because they knew social services wouldn't approve. But now he is legally theirs, they can do what they like.

They seem to have a strong following who are lapping it all up, who think they are the most amazing dads, Lincoln is a lucky boy etc etc.

Meanwhile they are monetising the whole situation and goodness knows what the little boy's birth family make of it.

OP posts:
CasuallyConfused · 04/02/2026 14:52

I came looking to see whether there was already a thread about this. I don’t follow them, but their content started appearing on my social media as suggested posts around the time they began sharing that they were “bringing their son home,” followed by the flood of videos the baby shower etc etc etc.

It was immediately obvious that this must have happened earlier in the year, which likely explains how they’ve been able to share so much. Even with his face blurred, though, it would be very easy for someone who knew the child to recognise him, which makes the amount they share surprising.

They do appear to avoid sharing his real name, consistently referring to him only as “our son” and never saying his name on camera, even in moments like his first steps, where you’d naturally use it. I don't believe he is called Lincoln, but it is good they have done this. They also post older videos where he appears much younger, which I assume is to avoid people guessing his age. That at least suggests some awareness.

That said, I still find the whole thing uncomfortable. The “he’s so lucky” comments and the monetisation of adoption doesn't sit right with me, and it often feels like their influencer persona comes before the child’s needs. In many videos they’re focused on the camera rather than him, and it comes across as staged content, with a toddler as the centrepiece who has no understanding of what’s happening.

Overall, it presents a very sanitised and unrealistic picture of what is actually a complex and emotionally demanding process.

IsThisTheReaLife · 04/02/2026 18:45

I think that the sanitised view of adoption is the problem. Especially now where all universal and adoption specific services are either non existent or heavily gate keeped.

But also, it has to be sanitised, the alternative would be worse, the child's difficulties shared with the world.

The calls from nursery / school, the behaviours that mean other school gate parents wont look you in the eye, the SEN pathways, assessments etc.

I also think the child çould be identified by their hair and build.

IsThisTheReaLife · 04/02/2026 18:49

Also those videos will follow him around through out his schooling, and he has lost the ability to choose who knows he is adopted.

Ted27 · 06/02/2026 15:16

@IsThisTheRealLife

To be fair, over the years I have plenty of posts from relatively new adopters, say 1 to 2 years in, waxing lyrical about how marvelous their lives are. I have raised my eyebrows and thought wait till they start school.
Whilst I don't agree with plastering it all over social media, I don't agree its necessarily sanitised. Its their experience so far.

Arran2024 · 06/02/2026 15:39

Ted27 · 06/02/2026 15:16

@IsThisTheRealLife

To be fair, over the years I have plenty of posts from relatively new adopters, say 1 to 2 years in, waxing lyrical about how marvelous their lives are. I have raised my eyebrows and thought wait till they start school.
Whilst I don't agree with plastering it all over social media, I don't agree its necessarily sanitised. Its their experience so far.

Just as long as they don't run into massive problems later on and blame sws etc for not educating them properly about early trauma. So many adopters try to tell new and prospective adopters but they won't listen. Fair enough, but I find it infuriating when they appear later on, on a mission to make sure no one else makes the same mistakes they did, when we told them what to expect up front.

They have taken this kid on a 15 hour trip to Japan and he hasn't even been with them a year!

OP posts:
MattDillonsEyebrows · 06/02/2026 18:09

Ted27 · 06/02/2026 15:16

@IsThisTheRealLife

To be fair, over the years I have plenty of posts from relatively new adopters, say 1 to 2 years in, waxing lyrical about how marvelous their lives are. I have raised my eyebrows and thought wait till they start school.
Whilst I don't agree with plastering it all over social media, I don't agree its necessarily sanitised. Its their experience so far.

Absolutely this. I say this from the midst of the trenches with AD9 suspended again today, she is fast heading for expulsion and her sister 8 who we are desperately trying not to make a glass child as she fawns and is no ‘trouble’. I would hate to have documented their lives like these people are doing at a time like this.

Ted27 · 06/02/2026 19:01

@MattDillonsEyebrows

I expect that if and when life gets hard they won't post so much.
Also they will be more limited when he starts nursery/school as they won't be allowed to film

Whinge · 08/02/2026 08:19

Ted27 · 06/02/2026 19:01

@MattDillonsEyebrows

I expect that if and when life gets hard they won't post so much.
Also they will be more limited when he starts nursery/school as they won't be allowed to film

Unless they go down the home education route. Which seems to be increasingly common for content creators who constantly film and share their children. Not because it's in the best interests of their child, but because their child is quickly becoming the sole focus of their content. If they send him to school / nursery, that's several hours a day where they can't film him.

EachandEveryone · 10/02/2026 13:37

Im sure he will go to normal school and it will all die down. They are treating him
like a dolly at the moment.

what about Joss Stone? She is all over Instagram with hers including the adopted one

ForDearSwan · 11/02/2026 13:06

Im sure he will go to normal school and it will all die down: There should be nothing to die down. This child shouldn't be on social media at all.

They are treating him like a dolly at the moment: That's a huge issue. Treating an child as a 'dolly' isn't informed parenting for any child, never mind an adopted one.

what about Joss Stone? She is all over Instagram with hers including the adopted one: What about her? Whataboutism doesn't make it right.

FinallyMummy · 12/02/2026 19:15

I find them very hard to watch - they just randomly pop up when I’m doom scrolling.

The fact people will know their child has been adopted is less of an issue imo - they’re a gay couple, if they have a child the general assumptions are going to be that the child is either via surrogacy or adoption.

I can’t quite believe that they post their dc so much - everyone I know who has adopted has gone to great lengths to make sure their child’s image isn’t made widely available.
I know they blur his face but I could recognise nieces and nephews from the funny way their hair curls/their babbling noises/the way they walked from a young age. if I was part of their dcs birth family there’s a pretty good chance I’d recognise them.

I also think the way they’re attempting to monetise the adoption is sickening. You shouldn’t be using your dc to make money regardless but if you add in the additional complications and risks associated with adoption it makes it so much worse. And I don’t understand how this wasn’t flagged as a concern during their approval - they were making random content before going through the process from what I can see.

I’m not sure what my point is. Disbelief that people are taking these kinds of risks with their dc to get likes/money mostly I think.

Teenageboymum · 22/02/2026 11:32

THANK YOU!!!!

Ive felt like i was cracking up with all the “oh my god you guys he is soooo lucky comments”

They have got zero respect for that child or his needs. He has been torn away from his mother, he has been torn away from
his foster parents, and now he is monitored to high hell.

if I had of heard the blonde one say “15hr” flight one more time I think I would have actually boiled over.

they are two very immature selfish people.

Parsley4321 · 26/02/2026 21:36

what I found odd was the couple getting a really young child like how ? It’s not normal I would say I think Mathew and Ryan are heading for a fall hope not but it’s too much

Ted27 · 27/02/2026 02:29

@Parsley4321

Setting aside the issues of plastering him all over social media, why do you think its odd that they have such a young child. They will have gone through the same matching process as everyone else

Reportingfromwherever · 27/02/2026 08:09

Parsley4321 · 26/02/2026 21:36

what I found odd was the couple getting a really young child like how ? It’s not normal I would say I think Mathew and Ryan are heading for a fall hope not but it’s too much

What’s not normal about this? I adopted a baby, and all my adopter friends adopted children around or under one. It’s not unusual.