Aaarrrgghhhh Christmas!!!!!

[gerbilgirl]

Anyone else wishing Christmas would hurry up and be here?

This is our third Christmas together and each year the struggle in the build up to it is so hard!!

Our 6 year old is very vocal about how she is feeling which is great and is really taking on board ways we are giving her to help, so although is finding the build up hard is managing it better this year.

Our 10 year old on the other hand is in complete regression mode and just wants to be in her room not engaging with anyone unless she is able to be in control of them.

Come Friday they will be fine and really enjoy the day and each year it gets a bit easier but just wish this bit wasn't so hard on them.

I know I won't be the only one feeling like this at the moment but how I wish it wasn't like this for them!!!

How do you all make it through?

I think this has gone far enough now

Ah, so what specifically about the adoption process would you like to be changed?

You’re obviously either professionally involved with adoption if you aren’t an adoptive parent or you’re an adoptee, because of course someone who literally didn’t have a clue wouldn’t be silly enough to pretend they’re in the know.

@Jellycatspyjamas

I’ve had to wrap the nougat bar in bubble wrap and newspaper and conceal it deep within my filing cabinet.

It’s when you then come across that bubble wrapped bar and think “how the hell did that get there”.

I thought it was a nougat bath bar at first, I though “oh, I didn’t know they had sugar in” then the penny finally dropped.

I love it when my children have talents (like art, dance) and I think "thank you didn't get my genetics! You're awesome!"

Don't tell the birth child, but it does mix things up a bit. People who have three birth children, by the third one who inherits dad's musical ability, I wonder if the parents are like 'yeah, yeah, do something new!' (in case of doubt, I am again making a joke. Humour is subjective. If you don't find me funny, that's ok. I won't cry myself to sleep. I may have a glass of something, though.)

@Moominmammaatsea like I said you would do better to deal with your own problems and your own inadequacies rather than trying to stir up trouble for others. If your ac is lying, stealing etc then whatever other achievements they have, their needs are not being met in a very serious way. You need to focus on that, and leave off posting here for a while. You need to get and pursue help until you have helped your ac. Ok? And enough with the "sassygromit" comments - you are clearly trying to out someone, and that is pretty low. Your lack of fundamental respect for others might be linked to your problems at home.

Anyway, I am off now. Return to your grey rocking you are quite welcome to that.

Thank fuck for that.

@simonjt you see I would expect an informed adopter to know what are considered to be problems with adoption and what has been recommended to be done about it. Have a look at the independent enquiry from 2018 for a start. Included in the preface is the statement "There is a dearth of information and meaningful longitudinal research to inform policy and social work practice on adoption....Without this information, the arguments made for adoption in its current form and current policy are insufficiently evidenced". This is nothing to do with being anti adoption per se.

This is exactly the right place for adopters to share the highs, AND lows of adoptive parenting. We can't all be practically perfect like Mary Poppins here. Some of us are normal parents, muddling through with love, chocolate, wine, and dark humour. And honest posting and sharing on the adoption board.

Just in case you haven't seen it, there is a thread titled 'why I'm no longer talking to non-adopters about adoption' that I feel should be required reading for non-adopters to read before posting here.

Let's get back- please, let's continue, how was everyone's Christmas with their adoptive children? I'm struggling to manage the sugar intake (not just mine!)

waves farewell to sassygromit

And there it is, in one single sentence an indication of why that particular adopter, who wrote it, should be getting professional help.

“I don’t know what any problems are so I’m going to try to he clever by turning the question around in an attempt to hide my ignorance”.

Well done for being able to use google though.

My eyes are rolling, and I apologise, @Moominmammaatsea, I thought you were barking up the wrong tree, and I now see you weren't. Clearly she's right, and I lack insight. Good catch.

@percypetulant and why so many adoptees are trying to take legal action about their childhoods

But this thread is about adopters and Christmas.

There's a 'start new thread' function. Feel free. Someone might bite. (Not me, I'm too busy getting shit faced, and eating so I have to be winched out the window.)

I’ve had a fabulous Christmas thanks! My DC is the perfect age for magic and wonderment and it’s been such fun to witness their excitement. I’m happy to say that we’ve had a lovely time. It’s just such a shame it’s going to be followed by such a shitter of a January (if media reports are to be believed).

@Stinkyjellycat

I’ve had a fabulous Christmas thanks! My DC is the perfect age for magic and wonderment and it’s been such fun to witness their excitement. I’m happy to say that we’ve had a lovely time. It’s just such a shame it’s going to be followed by such a shitter of a January (if media reports are to be believed).

I’m worried about January as well, if primary schools aren’t open it will be interesting to say the least. My son just can’t manage the change of school routine so wouldn’t cope with a keyworker space.

Is anyone else still have cake for breakfast?

Yes, the uncertainty over school is definitely affecting behaviour here. As is the lack of all the usual traditions, and missing extended family.

We talk about the vaccine every day, as a 'hook of hope'. It's so hard on them, and us, waiting for January to hit, managing the uncertainty.

Most importantly of all...... @gerbilgirl how was your Christmas?

I’m trying to stop my girl main lining chocolate at every opportunity - I’m glad most places and parties gave out the small Cadbury selection boxes cos they were gone before they reached home. My son on the other hand is nibbling away on the smallest freddo bar possible driving his sister crazy in the process.

@Jellycatspyjamas

I’m trying to stop my girl main lining chocolate at every opportunity - I’m glad most places and parties gave out the small Cadbury selection boxes cos they were gone before they reached home. My son on the other hand is nibbling away on the smallest freddo bar possible driving his sister crazy in the process.

We had tears this morning as someone finished the bag of percy pigs, he finished the bag of pervy pigs...

Well that was an unfortunate typo

We’ll be out of school until at least the 18th, though I suspect it’ll be longer and my two wouldn’t cope with a key worker place either so it’s an extended holiday with some additional time with their tutor here.

It sounds as though primary schools will stay open but the government’s tendency to change their mind at the last minute doesn’t fill me with confidence.

On another note... I have Minority Report on in the background and I’d forgotten how utterly delicious Tom Cruise was/is. He’s an adopter so it’s not entirely unrelated to this thread

@SimonJT never mind alcohol, you’ve bigger fish to fry 😂