I want my baby back - Panorama

[Hels20]

I hesitate to put this on the board but would be interested in the views of anyone who watches this - it's tonight on BBC 1 at 9pm.

I hope it gives a balanced account. Then there is the Channel 4 programme on Wednesday T 10pm on Finding a Mum and Dad.

Genuine question: if children are in a home where there is domestic violence, is it ever not in their interests to leave as quickly as possible? Even if they aren't direct victims, they will be harmed by what they see and hear. Don't get me wrong, I know how hard it is for victims of DV just to leave, but the children really do have to be put first.

Or perhaps a puppeteer pulling lots of strings.

Yep. Don't forget his mistresses too ;)

Why would you need to arrange free legal advice, wizard? Legal aid is freely available to parents involved in care proceedings with no need to prove means. I do hope you tell them that? And who gives the free advice you arrange? Would it be a Birmingham based firm by any chance?

I'm still mystified why parents would come to a web consultant. How do they find you, wizard? And why are they apparently exclusively women?

I am doing my real job.

And Im not praying on anyone

preying, not praying.

So, you still won't tell us what you do and who you are.

ten pages in. Despite saying you had no problem with people knowing who you are.

Right.

Well, I think that tells us pretty much all we need to know about you.

Do people find you or do you find them? Do you advertise? Is it a spare time thingy? Seeing as you say you are doing your "real" job now?

there was a thread that was deleted a few weeks ago started by someone claiming to be an advocate for parents of snatched children, who directed them to Brendan Flemings firm.

goodness me.

Advertise what? I dont charge anything or seek to gain anything

Drinksangria - are you referring to my saying that I thought I knew who the poster was. Because if it was then any veiled threat was entirely in your own mind. wizardpc posts in an identical style to two previous posters whom I have had identical circular pointless conversations and if it was the same man then I really didn't want to go around the same old block again and again and again and again.

The idea that any of us middle aged plump matrons are sitting at our computers at home cackling "I know who you are, I'll ave yoooo" is laughable!

I could I suppose send the boys round but as mine is 8 he wouldn;t be much good. Even if I actually knew where wizardpc was.

I don't know why I bother engaging because he has himself admitted that his "thousands" of forced adoptions which were a mistake isn't actually based anything at all and is in fact over a 24 year period (Lord knows why 24 year not 25, 25 would be neater) but still all imagined.

Are we not allowed to challenge that without being called bullies?

That feels to me rather like the response when you don;t have a response.

Anyway the fact remains that you won't find a single person on this thread who thinks that even one case of mistaken adoption is acceptable or one person who thinks that the system doesn't need review and investment or even a single parent on this thread who wouldn't be completely devastated if they lost their child. What you will find is parents who believe that because 1 case a year is decided wrongly or 10 or 20, that it should not result in a virtual ban on adoptions without birth parent consent.

Obviously I don't expect the person whose child is that one to agree with me because the other 3999 cases aren't their concern (understandably) but I would expect reasonable adult humans who can look at the system objectively to be able to make reasoned judgements on a system creaking with cases of appalling abuse of children to be restrained about calling for all "forced" adoptions to stop.

And I will challenge people who throw around emotive terms and suggest compensation is the way forward even at the risk of you calling me a bully. Sometimes even "bullies" have to stand up and be counted.

right. then you are just attention seeking for the hell of it.

Vague assertions of helping folk find legal help and technical help (wonder what kind of technical help a distressed parent needs, setting up a blog perhaps?).

It all amounts to a big pile of nothing. No debate, no evidence, nowt.

well said, Kewcumber, well said.

The rather sad thing is you are so far off the mark, it's unbelievable. I have absolutely nothing to do with any legal firm - I have a friend who works at one.

Let's hope none of your children bumps into a door frame ever or that you make one silly mistake. It does happen!!

and Im in Essex for those that really want to know.

Sorry DrinkS that should have been addressed to turnwest

Getting to like the sound of my own voice too much - time for a break and to do some real work I think!

yeah well. until you share, your vague wibblings have no currency here.

And all our children have had mishaps, and trips to A&E are very common. (fondly remembers 3 year old ds tripping over a french door lintel and catapaulting over the concrete stairs head first onto gravel area at the bottom) Have yet to have SS round my gaff. In common with most people here. So do take your baseless conspiracy nonsense and peddle it elsewhere.

we don't care where you are! I am not interested enough in you to google conspiracy theorists in essex...

thus endeth any engagement with 'Wizard'.

My son has broken his thumb. And regularly had bruises visible when sw turned up.

Whats your point? That social worker routinely take children away from parents with bruises?

My kids do bump into doorframes

And fall down the stairs

And get broken limbs, black eyes, bumped heads

Actually forget kids plural, this is all mostly DD2

I cannot even count our trips to the doctors and A&E and I've never had the slightes hint of child protection concerns

@lilka

then you're lucky - it happens

I have also supported a friend who was (incorrectly) accused of child abuse and a very scary very officious social worker and her boss were involved. It was horrible and a traumatic experience for the mother and I was glad to be of help.

I do not live in some kind of glittery adoption bubble where the system is shiny and clean and all social worker and doctors are paragons of virtue. I have seen all sides of the adoption triangles and sometimes it really hasn;t been very pretty.

But I would prefer to engage with people in discussing what we could do to improve the system rather than quantifying the value of a lost child to a parent or banning the majority adoptions of needy children.

So where does your friend work at, and how is he able to give so much free legal advice? Most solicitors' firms require their staff to account fully for their time. And I ask again, why do all these mothers come to a web/social media consultant, and how do they find you? I really am mystified that they would do that rather than just go direct to a lawyer.

Er, no Kewcumber. I was referring to John Hemming threatening Maryz on previous threads. And I suppose I was saying that I think that wizard is either The Hem himself, or one of his acolytes.

I think you'll find I am very much on the same side as you.

Please can you tell us how people find you? Who refers them on to you?

Why would you not want to share this information?