Newbies

[Italiangreyhound]

Hi I am a newbie and only just started this journey, officially made the call last week.

Just interested how may other newbies are out there who are still in the early stages. I keep coming across people and recognising names. Anyone want to let on what stage they are at?

Hi Mieta - DH and I did the list a few weeks ago, and our strategy was to rule out the things we knew we definitely couldn't cope with and for the rest to put 'would discuss'. For the majority of things on the list there is a huge spectrum and whilst we probably couldn't cope with the extreme end of the things, we could with the milder end. It's resulted in us having 'would discuss' for most of the list, but this will allow us to consider things on a case by case basis. I hope that makes sense!

Inthebeginning - it sounds like you're being put through the mill. I hope you're able to take some time out and relax this weekend.

Hi Meita it sounds like we did a combination of Cheerygirraffe and In the beginiining!

MY DH and I went through the list saying yes, no and maybe and ended up with a big pile of maybes and quite a few yeses and a few noes.

Ironcally whatever we said once we started looking at profiles at matching events that kind of all went out the window! Because we did not always know what was in the children's history from their basic profile.

I also think of all the kids I have seen on Be my parent, in the copy of Children who wait that I saw, and at the local and national matching events I went to, only a very small portion had Downs Syndrome or hearing problems. However, of those whose actual profiles I read there was a recurring theme of mental health issues, and or learning dififculties, and or drugs or alcohol abuse. Which could affect the children in any number of ways. So in a way for me it is maybe the case of how these challenges have affected the child.

I think I am saying keep an open mind about finding out about stuff, we all have areas we feel relatively sure we could or could not cope with but these may change and by filling in the paper you are not agreeing to any one child. I do also feel adopting as a couple you do need to agree and so i found it easier in theory for my DH and I to fill in copies of the form singularly and then to compare notes.

Someone on this thread kindly sent me a checklist but we've never been asked to fill one out by our SW. Does the PAR mention the children you feel able to parent? She's never actually asked us to do a yes/no thing.

it was me choccy :-) think ours was in the last but if the par but our la do it as a separate sheet too

Might ask about it when we see some more of the SW Team at training next week.
Inthebeginning sorry - so many names on our luffly thread!

DD already had two middle names. We kept her first name and one middle name, and added two more - one from each side of the family, so she has three middle names now!

I love the fact that she keeps her identity, but has a link with our families.

I just posted....

You are right!

If he does not want two then the one from his side could drop out!

Or maybe one could have your side's name and one his sides?

Our dd has my mum's middle name (which is similar to my maternal grandma's first name) as a middle name.

Hopefully, our ds will have my father-in-laws's name (which was his father's, my husband's paternal grandfather's, first name).

Does that make sense?

we have a panel date and introductions timings! !!!!

Fabulous!!

Great news !

hurray!

Today was our last prep day. This week the SW meets all our referees (so we have two lots of visitors coming to stay) then she'll be finishing our PAR. Panel is only six weeks away!

Not long to go nowr choccy ! Lovely feeling when par is all done!
pru was your reorganised panel today?

Panel is this morning! Fingers crossed!

Good luck pru :)

good luck pru! looking forward to hearing your good news later today.

We passed! Don't think I've ever been so nervous! But after some questions (which I can't remember at all how we answered!), they said we had passed with flying colours! Now relaxing with a cup of tea and chocolate!! Apparently our approval gets ratified in a couple of weeks then the family finder starts to look for potential matches. Can't quite believe we have finally got this far. Hooray!!

Congratulations pru! Good news!

Many many congrats, Pru

Italian just wanted to offer my belated congratulations on your match with your little DS-to-be. I haven't even been lurking much because the slowness of my LA is causing me to combust if I think too much about it so had missed your news. Wonderful wonderful wonderful!

I remember the feeling well!! Congrats.

Kudos for relaxing with a cuppa - we were straight on the champers!!

Well done.

MoJangled... I truly sympathise. For various reasons we took 18 months from initial phone call to approval.

You'll get there in the end and will look back and realise, not only was it worth it, but if someone at your LA called you tomorrow and said you had to start all over again, you would.

Hoping things speed up for you soon

wonderful news pru! x

Thanks MrsBW for the words of support! Currently chasing for a yes or no on whether we can do the APR Day 3 course next weds, amidst paperwork delays and lost messages, and they think they might be able to confirm by Friday, which they seem to think is completely normal and I want to ask them if they can just take a day off (or not) at 3 days notice.... Deep breaths!

Adding my congrats to Pru too!