Do you think women cheat more than men?

[WhiteCompanyMagicNights]

Just having this debate with a male friend.

He thinks women cheat more. As he’s got most romantic interest and flirting from women already taken or married etc

Whereas, as a woman I think men cheat more. And often at horrific times like after a baby is born etc

I think as a PP has said a lot of men cheat with sex workers.

I know one woman who cheated - married, no dcs, a job that required regular travel.

I can't count the number of men I know of, who have cheated. Most of my friends' husbands. To the point I assume all men cheat, and I choose not to have a relationship since I want to protect my own health.

I think there needs to be some Definition of what cheating is because I think men and women don’t always see it the same way. How often do you hear the term micro cheating now? All the time. But far more often it’s women saying it about men rather than the other way around.

if we mean just physically I think men are more likely to have ONS but a woman is more likely to engage in longer term affairs.

I think the OP’s friend correlating women flirting and women cheating is largely problematic, they aren’t the same (along with his other problematic misogynistic views).

I used to work near a very well known “massage parlour”. I must be very naive, because I was honestly shocked at the number of men arriving who were very clearly dressed for work. For some unknown reason I thought these places would only be open at night! But nope, that one only opens 10am to 6pm. These men (almost all wearing wedding rings) were clearly supposed to be at work, how would the wife ever know? So no, I think men cheat far more because women don’t have the option to just….nip out and pay for a shag at 11am on a Wednesday.

unfortunately I think you have also touched on a real divide. I would imagine the amount of sex worker usage if off the scale in its difference between the sexes. This taps into my PP that finding sex is much more difficult for the vast majority of men.

Logically it has got to be pretty even. Unless there are a few women doing a lot of cheating.

There was a thread on here a few days ago where lots of women seem to be going on girls trips to Turkey for sex.

Sex workers will account for a lot of the men, and the old story of a married man cheating with a younger single woman (so she's not cheating on anyone) is sadly all too common.

Quite - it's literally derived from the latin for Bene - Good and Dormias - "Sleep" even the Romans know it was good sleep in the nudge nudge wink wink sense.

Very easily, it seems. Same as he pulled a 20 year old me earlier ))

One thing to say though - he is funny, easy going and very generous with partners, (like old school generous) which I guess is a rare thing nowadays.

Some women are desperate for a relationship and would fall for anyone who treats them with even a tiny bit of kindness.

I don't believe that's true. I see plenty of women have cosy drinks and slinking off to their hotel rooms with randoms at conferences. I very much doubt they are IT professionals by day, and turn into ladies of the night post 9. I think women are just less likely to talk about it.

We are not saying women don't cheat, we are talking about who does more of it. It doesn't follow that every cheating man must be with a cheating woman because a lot of them will be with sex workers or younger single women who are not cheating on anyone. Do you truly think an equal number of women are cheating with gigolos or younger single men?

I used to work in a male dominated industry and absolutely women cheat
Lots of guys, I’ve been cheated on
The difference is a lot of men will put up with it or brush it under the carpet due to the fact they’ll lose everything the family home the kids and they’ll end up somewhere mid 40s in a rented bed sit trying to start again
But also might be a pride or macho thing their reaction is very different tend to keep it to themselves whereas when a woman’s cheated on she shouting from the hilltops

I think vast numbers of women treat with younger men. We just normalise it more. A women who cheats with younger men is called a "cougar" a men who cheats with younger women is a sleaze. I doubt many women pay for sex - it's easy enough to find men to have sex with for free.

The difference is a lot of men will put up with it or brush it under the carpet due to the fact they’ll lose everything the family home the kids and they’ll end up somewhere mid 40s in a rented bed sit trying to start again

A lot of women do the same for the same reason. Although women do instigate most divorces. I believe unreasonable behaviour was the most cited reason before no fault divorces were introduced.

A man who cheats with younger women is a stud and a lad and a daddy (ugh). The connotation of a cougar is that she's single, probably divorced and on the prowl. Not cheating. Plus, you really think there are more older women after a younger man than the other way around, or an equal number? Please. You know full well that when there's a significant age difference, it's usually in one direction.

There are zillions more derogatory terms for a sexual woman than a sexual man; normalising women having illicit or less mainstream sex and not men? Don't make me laugh.

It's not a case of women not cheating, of course they do. But it doesn't follow that every cheating man is with a cheating woman so the numbers must be about equal. Given their patterns, they are more likely to be cheating with someone who's not monogamously committed elsewhere: a sex worker or a younger, single person. The trope of an OW hoping her married lover leaves for her is far more common than an OM who hangs around forever hoping for the same from a married woman.

I think we can’t possibly know. Women are almost certainly better at hiding it if they do.

You're welcome to disagree with me. My lived experience is that I know a lot of married women who cheat. Whether it is more or less than the number of men I don't know but there isn't much in it.

I think men are probably more likely to brag about things like this and women are more likely to not tell anyone. I can’t see how anyone can possibly know for sure because people who are having affairs are not going to offer up this kind of information so someone can make a statistics chart.

Cougars can be single… nothing about that term connotes cheating

You're welcome to disagree with me.

Why thank you. Very kind.

Yes, as before, of course women cheat; don't worry, everyone is aware. Are there equal numbers of cheating women and cheating men - that is, having sex with others while monogamously committed elsewhere? Most unlikely and the patterns for who's most likely to be with whom outside of marriage (empirical stuff rather than what you personally see and note the most) point strongly in one direction.

I think men like him often think women are flirting or would actually follow up if they were flirting when they are not and would not. All a woman has to do is say Hi to a bloke and he thinks she would shag him. This is why some men get so angry when they find out the woman won't, so they rape or assault them instead.

Women usually find one man in their lives demanding enough.

If think women are keen to believe that women don't cheat much. This site is obviously going to have a bias.

Research says (and don't ask me which research because I can't remember) men used to cheat more (because of greater opportunity) but as more women routinely entered the workforce the amount they cheat increased and now there isn't much difference between the 2 sexes.

Anecdotely I know more women than men who have cheated but my mum reckons its men who cheat more so maybe there is an age difference 🤷‍♀️

I knew you were only here to remind us that women cheat too/just as bad as men/etc. All you have is "but women cheat too, MN is so unfaaaaair!"

Honestly, it was the "women having sex with younger men is so much more normalised than older men with younger women" nonsense that really gave you away. Although the magnanimous "you may disagree with me" stuff further confirmed it.

Despite your best efforts, MN is still a mostly female forum so it'll reflect that. It's like literally any other community in that regard. If you can't handle it, and you clearly can't, go somewhere like Reddit or the manosphere where everything is extremely just and fair and objective.