Do any parents use 4 weeks unpaid parental leave each year when returning to full time work?

[ThePoisedOpalBird]

I am potentially getting a full time job. I wont lie I am really struggling emotionally with this as I have only worked 2 days a week since ds1 was born but life is expensive and my partner is keen for me to earn more now my mat leave from ds2 is due to end so we can save to buy a house.

I have been looking at holiday allowance, bank holidays etc to see how to optimise my time with the kids.

Has anyone used a large amount of their unpaid parental leave to take extra time off each year?

I am thinking of using 4 weeks a year to boost my holiday total and increase the amount of time I get with the kids.

Does anyone else do this? Do your employers mind? I figured with holiday allowance of 5 weeks and 4 weeks of unpaid parental leave I would be almost doubling the time I get off with the kids which might help alleviate some of the sadness I feel about leaving them.

Intake one weeks unpaid leave a year. You have to take it as a block which is fine as I then use my actual holiday entitlement for ad hoc days.

I think it irritates my boss but tbh 25 days a year holiday is nothing and doesn't give me enough time with the children for my liking.

I think this is very naive. You don't stop being a mum or being needed after these years. There's a reason the allowance is spread over 18 years and lots and lots of genuine things can come up within those years that you could actually need that leave for. I understood as others did that this leave wasn't an optional additional leave to spend more time with children, it's for unseen circumstances / emergencies and for when you really need it to be spread across the entirety of their childhood.

I cant increase my hours where I currently am and there is a serious lack of 3 day week 9-5 jobs with no weekend working (which I need to work around DP).

Take dependents leave like everyone else

As a Manager I have had a few team members take PL. One took 8 weeks in one go to coincide with his wife’s mat leave and they went back to the home country. That was ok because it was a post I could use the salary savings to cover at such a long length. More difficult has been 4 weeks off because I can’t cover that and so it was a strain on me and I also have DC, just older! One member took it in blocks of two weeks to be off more of the school holidays. Again easier to cover as a normal holiday length.

Nope the leave for illness and emergencies is dependents leave.

One of the reasons given on the gov website for using parental leave is to spend more time with children.

Sorry, bad wording. I meant they encourage parents to take it because they are entitled to it.

And sorry, 1 month notice is still sudden, especially if the request is for something like school holiday cover. Yes it can be moved but normally, especially if the child is already at school, the parent wants it for a reason and a set time.

A week here and there is not a big issue, a 1 month absence is one.

I had colleagues taking it for things like planned surgery/illness related issues or to take a child longer abroad to see family across the world. And then it can work if the request comes with a decent notice and a proper cover plan can be set up.

OP I dont think many people understand or want this type of leave.

I've learnt about it from Mumsnet actually, and thought how great, as like you I also value time with my kids.

I generally take one week each year, employer is fine with it I ask for it in advance just like I would ask for normal holiday allowance in advance too.

People are a bit weird about it. I told colleagues who were moaning about needing more holiday, who then immediately said they don't want unpaid.

At another workplace you could buy up to 5 extra days of holiday, some people bought some (I always bought max possible) some didn't. It’s all exactly the same, unpaid leave under different names. However, it being a legal right will hopefully make it easier to request it.

Just ask in advance and enjoy :)

I'd possibly rethink this strategy. They need you more when they are older. Once they are 10 and 11 and hate holiday clubs you'll likely wish you hadn't wasted all your parental leave in a soft play centre.

I don’t disagree but the reality is that those of us needing to do the extra work did not have the same entitlements and anyone being away for extra leave will be missed in terms of the overall team capacity and impacts on others’ work load- so if you are very self-focused and resilient, you may not suffer any guilt - but I think many do…….and to be honest , many cannot afford to take the unpaid leave so there may be resentment towards those who can…… and I wonder if you are being unrealistic about the likely reception your request may be met with.

If I use 4 weeks for the next 3-4 years I will only use less than half my entitlement and my partner will have his as well.

And best case scenario I can go back to part time work once our finances are sorted.

But I want time with my kids whilst they are young and unpaid parental leave gives me that extra time.

Op, you seem to have given an awful lot of thought about what you can get from this employer. Fair enough. Have you given any thought to what this employer is going to get from you? IME, the best working relationships are those where it is a two way street. Flexibility from employers and commitment from employees. You seem to be expecting one without the other.

I am aware my employer will likely hate my request based on the replies on here.

But I shouldn't have to not take a leave I am entitled to just because others cant or cant afford to or don't want to.

They will get an employee who gets in at the start of their shift, does the work they need to do and then goes home. I will do what I am paid to do.

I haven't but colleagues have would say nobody begrudges about 2 weeks being used but had a colleague who used 7 weeks without fail in one chunk (2 children) They were not popular in the team (we share workloads when people are on holiday) and in the end it was postponed by the employer due to business needs which is allowable. In the end they have changed it so its just singular extra weeks (and they reduced the numbef of weeks) rather then 1 big chunk.

Many parents get by fine without using it. I buy an extra weeks annual leave from my employer.

Maybe see how you get on first rather then just stating that's what your doing from day dot especially in a probation period!

Yes I’ve taken it. It’s an entitlement rather than something your workplace has to be a fan of. They can delay it but they can’t deny it. My manager was difficult about it initially and then realised they were going to get themselves in trouble but several colleagues (and ironically that same manager!) have taken it since and it’s improved the culture over time to normalise caring for our children. I was quite pleased to have been a trailblazer (which in this day and age just taking your legally entitled time off is a bit of a sad word to use but it felt that way).

I did, I worked civil service and they offered it as ‘averaged hours’ so my pay was reduced each month but I didn’t take a hit of one month without pay.
I didn’t have local childcare so it worked really well when combined with my annual leave that I could cover most of the holidays easily.

The poster you are quoting is not talking about unpaid parental leave they are talking about some employers offering the ability to buy extra annual leave.

I wont be mentioning it to my employer before I pass my probation. Once I pass probation I will submit the request. I will use holiday instead during probation period.

But, it’s more than that? As you are apparently the default parent, you will also need time for family things…..dental appointments, parents evenings, the school concert, opticians appointments etc etc. If you are decent with your employer, ime, they will be decent with you. If you aren’t? They won’t.

In the summer I also used it flexibly so took 2 weeks off then a week or 2 back in then another 2 weeks off so it didn’t impact my work too much, this was unofficial as it was meant to be a 4 weeks off block. It worked well for me and my boss so wasn’t a problem.

Yes she can. It is clear from this thread that lots of parents don't actually know what their entitlement regarding statutory parental leave is. You can use it for whatever you want, in blocks of 1 working week, and as with annual leave your employer decline it if the dates don't work and delay it to a more suitable time.

I use about one week a year to top up my annual leave entitlement

Both DH and I take 2 weeks a year (1 for each child). I also encourage others to take it as well (I'm a manager).

I've had resistance from one work place, but legally they can't refuse, only ask you take it at a different time. I was the first person who had ever asked to take it.

I doubt I will still be at the company when DC start school. Its just something for now until I get something I actually want to do.

With any luck I can go part time again by the time DC start school.

As for appointments my partner has a weekday off so thats not an issue for appointments.

A lot of the parents I know who have SEND needs do.