Mumsnet things that make me not to want to help. Or even engage…

[CurlewKate]

“His hobby” “Person A and person B” Or even worse “Person A-let’s call them Sid”

Interestingly, nobody ever seems to add the 'D' when talking about in-laws. I don't know whether it's just because they think there are enough letters there already, or if they just can't stand them?!!

I agree with the SIL ones, though, where you often have to wait until there's a he or she before you get the context.

Urgh yes- these make me rage.

"My best friend wants to borrow 50k from me because it's a Tuesday, and she has already borrowed 100k from me over the last 10 years and not paid it back. Would it be ok if I gently suggested to her that I am not comfortable lending her more? I dont want to come across as a total bitch who is trying to financially control her even though she often insults me and calls me a big fat pig. Should I apologise when I say no? she really is a lovely generous person"

I've seen DHamster before. I presume the posters must be thinking something like "Well, I can't use DH, as people will assume that it means husband - even though I myself am not actually married; but I can't just use 'hamster' without the 'D', as I couldn't bear for anybody to mistakenly think that I don't dearly love little Harold and am merely ambivalent to him, so......."

😂There was me thinking DH stood for dear hamster. I was wondering why so many hamsters were being complete pricks.

I really dislike the H word anyway. To me it always sounds either nerdish or PITA-ish.

I will admit to usually switching off when any post begins with ‘Myself and (whoever)….’

Many years ago (probably at least 25 ish) when I first joined a specific interest forum, I was bemused at all these ‘DH’ people they were on about.

Who was it? Dopey Herbert or what?

It didn’t take long to dawn, but…

Often ‘me’ My sibling’ etc.

The theoretical alphabet people are designed to hide which person is the OP and the relationship to the other person.

Situations are very different depending on whether it is your third cousin, FIL, member of your book group or friend’s 16 yo Dc.

Just bloody tell us what’s going on

I like DH etc, if it’s a chatty thread it sounds clunky to keep writing out “my husband, my daughter”

Believe me it hasn’t stopped!

Marvellous little tapas bar there

"I can't say what, as it would be terribly outing."

Linda, sweetheart. No one cares that much.

I’ve never seen this but it’s ridiculous. Although not if you’re writing a novel. Sometimes you can’t tell, because the original post is so long.

When it’s really rambling with lots of DB DM SSis DDad

persons 1, 2 , 3

i lose interest

But some of them are multi-purpose. DC could be a cat, a cousin or a child, and it isn't always possible in a rambling thread to tell who is who.

DP - partner or your parents?

BIL - your sibling's husband or your partner's brother? Or indeed your partner's sibling's husband. We need to know!!!😂

If it's in Style & Beauty, BIL could just as easily mean Broad-Instep Loafers

This is a scream.

Stern voice = not a scream
Moderately raised voice = not a scream
Actual shouting or arguing = also not a scream

Either MNers live in some bizzaro-land alternate universe where people actually communicate like this (and always right in their face too); or they are lying through their teeth so as to portray events as far more dramatic that they actually were.

There is also a disproportionate use of "despising" things and people, when what they really mean is they don't like it, sometimes even quite a lot, but that still isn't despising.

Once saw ‘hubster’ used seriously.

Any thread with baby daddy, hubby, hubs, hubster, ‘let’s call them’. Instant backspace and hide thread.
Outing hobby, come on…..it’s always cycling. Don’t be so coy.

I hate when it's a straightforward thread about something ordinary life thing and MNers try to turn it into some dramatic abusive domestic situation. Like 'I'm so sick of bloody laundry around the house but I have no room for a dryer... ' etc etc. Reply: why are you doing all the laundry? Why isn't Dh helping, I'll bet he loves to see you stressing about this etc etc. I've seen this quite a lot, sometimes stretching the OPs post to ridiculous levels.

Titles with ‘we’ in such as ‘what are we wearing’, ‘what are we having for tea’ or baby name threads that are titled ‘Olivia, Tarquin, Andromeda and…?’

Threads asking about what happened in the 90s that wouldn’t be acceptable today where youngsters can be faux outraged at all the slapping and feeding children whole grapes that went on.

‘AIBU to have got upset when I had a minor disagreement with a stranger’, yes probably but it’s gone now and the thread just turns into a dog/cyclist bashing jamboree.

A wall of unpunctuated text, particularly when it’s a woman in an abuse situation. I just feel sorry for her but I really cba to wade through it.

There's a marvellous little Tapas bar there.

😂

🤣 These make me laugh. Some posters always want to uncover some secret trauma that doesn't exist.

Any threads where someone (usually a MIL) falls to the floor and/or starts crying.

It is very unlikely that this is what actually happened - unless you are in an episode of Dateline - therefore I don't really believe any of the other stuff you have described

Also, as @singthing describes, the screaming not screaming.

As per PP, I dislike extremely long OPs and especially if no paragraphs. I almost always immediately click away. Odd exception might be if the title indicates that it’s about a “CF neighbour” and their parking (as I like to be outraged).

Any posts that use the strike through feature. (Whatever happened to brackets/parentheses).