Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

School asking for flight details after unauthorised term-time absence abroad

653 replies

PersonalData · 20/09/2026 17:19

We went abroad mon-thu last week, ds (10) was in school the week before and went back on Friday. We let them know and obviously knew it would be unauthorised. As it was 8 sessions we don’t qualify for a fine. His attendance is usually 100%.

They asked on friday before and after for us to provide proof of the flights and other details for ‘safeguarding’ but he was back in school and clearly fine ?? We declined as this is private personal data. They replied back that we must submit the evidence by the end of tomorrow?

Is this usual ?

OP posts:
LydiaJayne · 20/09/2026 20:14

PersonalData · 20/09/2026 18:07

If they are really that worried they can make a referral and I’d provide SS with the details of our holiday . They could also speak to DS who would probably tell them every single
last detail about going to Turkey. I can even show them my teeth that I got whitened when we were there ! But as others have said how does that prove anything about abuse which can happen in any country if a parent is that bad would they stop abuse for a holiday ?
Im going to stand my ground over this.

It doesn't prove anything but a systematic approach to asking for all absences helps building a picture globally for the whole school population. It's not about individual cases, if they dont ask they'll certainly not find anything out but once parents know that everyone will be asked it opens the door to the deterrent possibly saving a child

Obviously you can take a personal stand against the system but it doesn't make a bad thing in itself unless you know for a fact no one else has been or ever will be asked and for some reason the school have a vendetta against you, that would be unreasonable of them if you're telling the truth

SpidersAreShitheads · 20/09/2026 20:17

The problem is that requests like this are made as some kind of blanket approach without any consideration for the individual circumstances.

If a child was unexpectedly off I could see why a school might want to check, to ensure they weren’t being kept off to hide injuries, or because the parents couldn’t be arsed.

But where there’s a child with a 100% attendance record, whose parents tell the school in advance what days he’ll be off and when he’ll be back (and only 4 days, not as if it’s a long two-week break), its very clearly not a safeguarding flag.

And aside from that, it’s a box-ticking exercise at best. Literally anyone could use flight numbers that they found listed online and get AI to knock up a boarding pass etc. Schools have no way of verifying the information. It’s just so they can say they asked and are covering their arse. It literally proves nothing.

I was a school governor for 5+ years (including acting Head of Governors) for a considerable time. We would expect checks to be made as necessary, not where they are meaningless and don’t actually have any value. A child with an excellent attendance record with no other safeguarding flags, and where the parents have informed the school in advance of fours days of planned absence, insisting on documentary proof is an unnecessarily heavy-handed approach.

notimagain · 20/09/2026 20:17

@tartyflette

But how does supplying them the flight details give them any confirmation that the family actually took the flights?

Yep, and even if they took those flights as presented to the school it doesn't also prove where the family ended up eventually, in the time between any sectors outbound/inbound to the UK

You get the problem, I get it, I know others get it, but maybe most posters are so honest they can't see how easy it is to make the info the schools are asking for almost utterly useless.

greyboringgrey · 20/09/2026 20:17

It's none of their business. Data collection should not be 'excessive' and this is one of the rules of the Data Protection Act.

I wouldn't use rude words to tell them to go away but politely decline. It really is none of their business where you went or where your child went.

calishire · 20/09/2026 20:17

I think this is normal. At my son’s school you fill in a form and they do ask you to provide flight details. It’s seems silly to you, but it’s them keeping a record. Because sometimes if there is something going on it’s a series of events or scenarios. So if in future if there was a concern, they can look back and review all the absences along with evidence of exactly what has happened. Multiple records will build a bigger picture. I’m not saying they suspect anything now. I’m just saying I think that’s why they keep a record of not just the absence but the evidence to go with it.

tartyflette · 20/09/2026 20:21

Surprisinglynice · 20/09/2026 17:40

Hence confirmation of flights booked and paid for!!

Flights booked and paid for is not confirmation of flights actually taken. Only the airiline can do that and I doubt that they would.

ViperHalliwell · 20/09/2026 20:21

Where are you located? In Scotland/NI, this request would be an overstep, but in England/Wales it is likely supported by official school guidance. I don't know why the school isn't pointing you to the official requirements - they should be on the school's website or otherwise published (that's a requirement) and should have been available to you at any time before or after the trip. If you can't find them, ask for a link or pdf. See also the DfE Statutory Guidance on the gov.uk website.

The requirement to report to the local authorities when a pupil exceeds nine missed sessions (which triggers the fine you mentioned, but not only the fine) uses a rolling 10-week window (England) or a school term (Wales). Your child's case is still in the middle of the window. It's unclear whether your child will need to be reported, but the school required to monitor the situation. (There are some other administrative requirements too, if you really want to sift through the jargon, but this is likely the most pressing one.)

Emailing the itin is the quick/easy way to meet the requirement. You can black out personal/financial info and they should confirm deletion after viewing. But you can also email a letter to the Head Teacher (signed by both parents) recapping the pupil's name and dates of absence and summarising the information you gave before you left, reiterating that the missed sessions should be officially recorded as "Unauthorised Holiday", and confirming that the pupil returned safely and attended school again on x date as planned. Include that you believe that the letter satisfies all immediate safeguarding and welfare check requirements and you decline to provide the private info such as the requested itinerary. (I'm not endorsing any of this, just pointing out where to find the backup and rationale.)

Dcare · 20/09/2026 20:21

What's the issue? Why can't you share the details and get this closed off?

SallyRabbit · 20/09/2026 20:22

They probably need to confirm you story so they know you didn’t keep him off because he had bruises in a visible location. Sometimes the non-abusive parents have to suck it up a bit because there need to be general rules to make the vulnerable kids safer.

Pipersgirl · 20/09/2026 20:24

Mumof305 · 20/09/2026 20:11

If the school have a safeguarding concern I would absolutely not accept a screenshot of something which could easily be faked, to deter them from reporting this. If they suspect the child had come to harm - then they would report it? The child has clearly been on holiday. If they wish to take it further then they can

But what you’re missing here is that it’s likely the school DON’T yet have a safeguarding concern. This is likely a new initiative that they are asking of anyone who removes their child during term time, as a measure to try and add an extra layer of possible pick up opportunity.
It goes back to what I was saying about building the bigger picture- a family who have never caused prior concern who provide the evidence asked of them, and that evidence tallies with what the class teacher has picked up about the child chatting etc. that will be the end of it. The school can make a note they are happy, and no spidey senses are tingling.

However, take your example of things being fabricated. An abused child will often be coached- what if the parent fabricates a boarding pass to Spain and the 9 year old talks about Turkey to their teacher, when actually they were at home letting their NAI injuries settle? Do you get that a fairly simple measure implemented for all can add an opportunity for abusers to cock up and make a mistake? Do you get that these little mistakes/inconsistencies can be vital in unpicking awful safeguarding cases?

Oneofpeach · 20/09/2026 20:29

canklesmctacotits · 20/09/2026 19:29

These rules and requirements aren’t invented for no reason. They’re the result of attempts to ensure the future is better than the past. The attempts may be misguided or ill thought-through or barely better-than-nothing. But if as a nation we wring our hands over the Victoria Climbie and Baby P and similar stories, we can’t as a society decide not to elect better/more competent leadership to create better rules and decide to ignore whatever efforts have been made.

Would you like to explain how providing boarding passes would have saved Victoria Climbie or Peter Connolly?

Because put simply, they wouldn’t.

Safeguarding has got to use common sense. Otherwise, it will be endlessly demanding families provide proof of this and that while real abusers get away with it.

Yhjan · 20/09/2026 20:32

Just send them the flight details. It isn’t personal / private data. They already have his personal data - which is his date of birth, address, parents etc.

I think you are being obstructive. Schools have a responsibility to make sure kids are safe. 4 days absence is something they need to cover off by making sure that your kid was in Turkey or wherever. It would be so simple to send it and for them to check it.

Why are you even taking him out of school? You know it’s against rules. You can survive without a holiday. We didn’t go on holiday this summer - it’s not a big deal. Plus the education is (presumably) tax payer funded so if you take a place, you need to abide by the school’s rules and actually attend.

geumsun · 20/09/2026 20:32

Genuinely, I've no idea why anyone wants to work in a school, educate our kids and keep them safe. What a thankless job.

Rondayvu · 20/09/2026 20:33

Thankfully I do not live in England where you have to ask for authorisation to take your child out of school for any reason you want as the parent but surely it is just easier to send them the flight details and be done with it? I mean they know you were away and you are home now so whats the harm in just giving them what they want and moving on from it?

Yhjan · 20/09/2026 20:33

geumsun · 20/09/2026 20:32

Genuinely, I've no idea why anyone wants to work in a school, educate our kids and keep them safe. What a thankless job.

Well increasingly they really don’t. And they quit. And they are often not replaced. And the remaining staff are under mega pressure.

ADHDDoomScroller · 20/09/2026 20:33

But surely if you were waiting for injuries to fade, wouldn't have notified school in advance that you would be going "on holiday", then waited until only that date to beat your child at the arranged time so they could heal in exactly the number of days you'd said you'd be away for? And flight numbers don't mean you were on the plane, only that you know how to use Google. Sounds illogical to me. I understand why they are vigilant and so they should be, but this is not the most accurate or reliable system for what they are trying to achieve. If you said you'd had a bug and been off for 4 days, what evidence do they ask for then? It might not have needed a GP in that time.

Autumn2026 · 20/09/2026 20:34

Was it 8 sessions or did you child have time off before that they suspect it wasnt all holiday? That's the only reason I can think why they are asking

Anyahyacinth · 20/09/2026 20:34

JLou08 · 20/09/2026 17:51

I've never been asked when my DC have been on holiday.
I've never asked or heard of anyone asking whist working in CP, with children who actually are at risk.
What a pathetic waste of time. How realistic do you think it is that a parent would think, I fancy abusing my kid in a couple of months, let's put a request into school for a holiday so I can beat them and leave marks in visible places and have them off for 4 days to heal. Yeah, 4 days will be alright, doesn't take longer than that to heal does it 🤔
Do you work in a school that has this guidance? Does no-one have the critical thinking skills to realise how stupid it is?

I don’t understand the strong reaction or seeing this as private information.

However ..you can’t imagine a situation where a child is severely abused for money or visiting abuser being arranged in advance. You think nothing is coordinated in that world with advance planning? That seems incredibly naive

LydiaJayne · 20/09/2026 20:35

Oneofpeach · 20/09/2026 20:29

Would you like to explain how providing boarding passes would have saved Victoria Climbie or Peter Connolly?

Because put simply, they wouldn’t.

Safeguarding has got to use common sense. Otherwise, it will be endlessly demanding families provide proof of this and that while real abusers get away with it.

Has anyone suggested that those two cases would have had a different outcome? Baby P was a toddler not a school pupil anyway

Not being able to save every child isn't a reason not to try and save some. Boarding passes are specific to this situation, the questions asked will no doubt depend on the individual case

WellThatIsABitMad · 20/09/2026 20:35

Ask to see their safeguarding and attendance policies. If it’s not in there as a requirement then say no.

Oneofpeach · 20/09/2026 20:36

geumsun · 20/09/2026 20:32

Genuinely, I've no idea why anyone wants to work in a school, educate our kids and keep them safe. What a thankless job.

I do.

But you aren’t going to keep children safe with silly rules that require yet more paperwork. Paperwork like that actually exacerbates the problem because the parent dutifully produces it, the school give an arbitrary glance and move on.

And what if they hadn’t been abroad but had been to a caravan in wales? How would you evidence that? So then you end up with insane ‘have to prove yourself if you left the country but not if you didn’t’ sort of cases.

Unfortunately, it’s always going to be possible for a determined adult to abuse a child. The problem is that draconian sort of rules in place which demand evidence and proof and for people to back up what they are saying do nothing to keep children safe.

If someone can tell me one way that showing a plane ticket proves you didn’t harm a child I’m all ears.

TheDenimPoet · 20/09/2026 20:37

AuntieBiotics · 20/09/2026 17:26

Safeguarding is one of those words bandied about by people supposedly in authority to try to intimidate. Using it in this way undermines genuine safeguarding concerns.

the only scenario I can even conceive of where they might ask for flight details would be if they were concerned a 13/14/15 year old girl was being taken overseas to marry. Flight details could mean someone steps in. Clearly not the case here.

I would be asking them to explain exactly what their “safeguarding” concerns consist of, other than nosiness.

Or for FGM.

Oneofpeach · 20/09/2026 20:40

LydiaJayne · 20/09/2026 20:35

Has anyone suggested that those two cases would have had a different outcome? Baby P was a toddler not a school pupil anyway

Not being able to save every child isn't a reason not to try and save some. Boarding passes are specific to this situation, the questions asked will no doubt depend on the individual case

OK and a boarding pass will save a child how?

I am not being pointlessly argumentative here. I genuinely don’t know how what the school are asking for is going to help anybody.

greyboringgrey · 20/09/2026 20:40

@PersonalData

You say they just keep referring to safeguarding. Point out to them the history and there is no safeguarding concern with this child who has been away for 4 days with advanced notification.

Refer them the the UK GDPR Art 5 (1)(c) which provides that personal data shall be
(c) adequate, relevant and limited to what is necessary in relation to the purposes for which they are processed (‘data minimisation’);

say you consider where you went as a family, the flights you took is totally unconnected to 'safeguarding' and that this excessive in breach of the requirements of the Data Protection Act and the UK GDPR (the Information Commissioner's website has more on this if you interested).

If they still push back ask them to explain precisely how this information relates to safeguarding generally and then why in your child's case (Given his attendance history etc) it is required and not excessive.

Edited as my original post referred to the Third Data Protection Principle which is a bit out of date these days

The third data protection principle
You must ensure that the personal information you process is adequate, relevant and not excessive in relation to the purpose you’re processing it for.

ProudCat · 20/09/2026 20:41

JLou08 · 20/09/2026 20:12

Surely your common sense is able to tell me what difference that information will make to a child? How it will actually safeguard them seen as that's the reason for the request? How they will know if the child actually got on that flight? How it could indicate or rule out abuse? What exactly it would be evidence of and what use that evidence is? Please enlighten me. Other safeguarding professionals have given numerous explanations as to why this information isn't required, so please do educate us all.

The difference it will make: providing evidence to support what you say makes what you say believable.

How will it safeguard the child: it will ensure that parents and carers can't just make up any old reason for absence. The biggest indicator of abuse is unexplained absence.

How will they know the child got on the flight: they won't but most people don't book entirely fake holidays so you're maybe talking about 0.01% of cases. Bit weird to suggest a policy protecting 99.99% of children should be abandoned.

How could it indicate or rule out abuse: see above re: unexplained absences. Data is available online. Google is your friend.

What is it evidence of: it's evidence of a planned and explainable absence.

It's about keeping children safe. Schools don't have an alternative agenda. It's nothing to do with control or any Big Brother thing. It's just so they can check off that the absence has been explained through evidence.

Swipe left for the next trending thread