Why is there so much stealth wealth talk on here lately?

[Unexpectedlhereagain]

What’s with all the stealth, wealth bragging on here lately?

Let's just say I became facebook friends with a group of mumsnetters from a long running thread we had and it was eye opening to see the difference between the affluent lifestyle most of them affected to have on MN and the far more mundane reality of 3 bed terraces/semis in very ordinary places. They are all lovely ladies and I don't think any were exactly lying more just telling a filtered /polished version of reality

Maybe I’m naive but I believe most of the posts on Mumsnet. I know tons of people earning lots of money, going on amazing holidays, who have clever, confident children etc etc. Not just in London but all over the UK and the world.
I can’t relate to a lot of the posts where there is loads of drama around parents, weddings, neighbours etc but I don’t not believe them.
Is it so hard to believe that people have different lives? And how is it boasting when it’s an anonymous forum?
I do realise there are posters who make up dramatic posts but I like to believe most are genuine!

I think a lot of people post about the lives they want to have, rather than the lives they actually do have.

I feel that 90% posters are on 6 figures salaries, privately educating their children.... they seem to mention it so casually, like everyone earns this with just a bit of effort.

So it made me laugh when someone posted a couple of months ago asking "those of you on £200k, what do you do? I want a new career" and got mostly replies from people saying "I earn £50k"... basically laughing about how unrealistic they were being....

There were a handful of £200k earners saying their job was very specialist and it took years to build up to it (I.e. hospital consultant who works for NHS and private on the side.... or corporate lawyer).

I agree, what's the point of lying on an anonymous forum? 🤷‍♀️I could say I'm the wealthiest or poorest person and no one would know.. or care!
If anything I think it is a good opportunity to be more authentic and get advice/solidarity where no one knows you. I tend to believe what I read because I can't see what you would gain otherwise.

Lately ?
There used to be a poster happily sharing from her annual beach holiday in the Maldives or somewhre ...sneerng at other guests

I’m sure there are, my point was the reputation MN has, not whether I think that’s reflective of reality or not.

I think it’s always been that way. There was a thread the other day from someone asking what sort of income you’d need in order to have 2 x big holidays a year, new car etc. Immediately there was an influx of posters listing their joint income and how much they had in savings and how much they spent on holidays etc. Yawn.

If it’s even true (and I doubt a lot of it), it just comes across as obnoxious. No one cares how much you earn! Well at least I don’t.

I can’t see much of an in between - either well off and spending in middle class mum shops (arket, sezane, me+em etc) and with a husband who works abroad or they claim UC DLA for 3 kids plus PIP for themselves
like… is anyone just, you know, a bit average?

Yes, I saw that. There was one poster on there who claimed to be earning £50k per month between her and her dp! The bragging was so seriously over the top it was laughable ! 😂

Me. I'm average and live in Yorkshire. I'm not wealthy, nor am I queuing up at food banks. DD didn't get all top grades at GCSE or A levels, nor did she go to a top 10 university. She also has no interest in being a lawyer/banker/accountant etc.

And I am content with my lot in life.

I fed four people and two cats yesterday (does that count as a family of six?), and still have quite a lot of chicken left so will report back in due course.
#chickenchallengelol

But some couples could be earning £50k a month- that’s £600k a year. I have family members who earn way over that. There are plenty of lawyer/ accountant/ banking couples who could easily be earning £300k before tax each in the big companies. It’s not really bragging if they’re just stating it as fact.

Well you don’t look hard enough then . Not everyone has to get by on £3.37 a week and those that don’t have every right to discuss what’s important to them . It’s not a forum for the poor although most of the distain seems to come from them judging by this thread .

A quick search suggests that less than 0.1% of households have an income of over £600k a year, so it’s not all that common.

I know it’s not that common but it completely depends where you live. At my DCs state primary there would have been quite a few families with that sort of income. Many of the people living around me will be earning that. Lots of families at DCs secondaries earning that. And I’m not in a particularly smart area, just a fairly mixed area of London.
In other parts of the country very very few people would be earning that.
Just trying to answer the posters who refuse to believe that anyone could be earning that and they must be lying.

Wealth in the UK is very unequal at the moment and i think quite a lot of people on here assume lots of posters are 'lying' or fibbing, because they don't recognise this lifestyle within their own circle. The reality is, while lots of people are on low incomes, there's also a significant minority, and clustered in the south east in particular, who are earning large salaries, paying off mortgages, and accruing large savings pots.
Think about the NHS and the no doubt 10's of thousands of well paid doctors it employs. A quick google suggests over 200,000 doctors. School headteachers are largely on high salaries and there are over 30,000 schools in the UK. Thats before you start on stuff like finance, tax, law which can all be very highly paid careers. Engineering, university research job, lots of comfortable salaries out there.
Yes lots of people are struggling but at the other end of the spectrum plenty of people are not struggling.

Don't assume people are lying. If you live in an affluent small town where house prices are high it can be perfectly true that among your social network its normal to have a large detached house, 2 good salaries, and decent savings pots.

And its a bit naïve not to recognise that usually people who are academic and hard working themselves (hence the high powered careers earning them lots of money) do tend to have pretty academic hard working kids too, and they can afford to pay for private education or tutoring, and to live in the catchment area of a good state school, so yes the kids are generally doing well at school and getting top grades.

Do people expect that the kids of a doctor and a top lawyer etc will be struggling at school and coming away with a batch of grades 3-5 at GCSE?

I know people in that earning bracket - and know that they wouldn't have time to hang around on Mumsnet!

But you're right they do exist in large enough numbers in London

I have a close family member who's household income before tax etc is in the 400k region (not in the 600k bracket but still pretty damn high compared to most of us mere mortals) and they do still manage to find time to procrastinate on online forums etc!

What they are real posts?? 🤔😆

@Westfacing- I know plenty with that household income who faff around on Mumsnet and other forums!

Where they post is generally a giveaway, AIBU is not a place for serious financial advice.

I had the same experience Ooohaaah
Mine was a pregnancy thread- so I reckon that's a pretty random cross section of posters, with nothing in common except the due date.
All completely ordinary people.
I was expecting to be the least well off.....
Nope.

honestly I find it weird that so many people refuse to accept that others might live in slightly different circumstances to their own. Even if only about 4-5% of the UK earn over £100k, that's still c. 3 million people. I'm certainly not one of them, and neither is hardly anyone I interact with regularly (maybe my boss or a friend's dad or whoever) but that doesn't mean they don't exist!

Neither does it mean they shouldn't be allowed to use MN just like anyone else. Just asking questions about their lifestyle isn't stealth wealth talk. I find it annoying when people do the whole '£100k isn't really much at all,' obliviousness but there's nothing wrong with people asking others for opinions on certain private schools or what ISA to use or problems with their nanny just because those things aren't universally affordable. If people could only post about something everyone else could relate to MN would be empty.