I reckon the new normal is parents moving out and leaving the kids.

[Notbuiltforheat]

In southeast England with its stupid house prices for sure.

the chances of any of my three teens earning enough to even rent let alone buy their own gaff round here (Home Counties) is negligible. I bought the family house with their dad (now my ex) before they were born and the mortgage is almost gone. We’d both had our own houses anyway. There is NOTHING even half affordable- even the stuff designated as affordable is nonsense. So my retirement planning is I move out to somewhere smaller and they carry on living here. And I think lots of other parents will be doing the same.

How can it be any other way?

I wasn't allowed back post Uni either - so had to rent but rents are now really high as well - so saving even harder.

DD1 happy to be back post uni saving for masters - when I was in similar position I was told to rent even though it was commutable.

Our 4 bed house is 969 square feet - so three adult kids here well it's a squeeze now - one bed sit flat worth of stuff in largest bed room with DD1 - though we do have loft we could go into if we had the money.

Oh yeah I mean if you want to do this stuff and have the means go for it and it's a great idea. I guess I was responding to the idea that providing the family home to your kids in this way is "the least you can do" because actually many many people will never be able to and that doesn't mean they're failing their kids. But saying this is "normal" or should be kinda gives that impression

But why would they wait until they can buy "family homes" until they move out? I don't understand why young people don't move out and house share any more? And then maybe buy a flat with a partner and work their way up to a family home?

Mine are moving out and house sharing ( separately). In London, it's quite hard to find a decent house share in budget. However, they are trying and will get there. One already did that in uni. I think house sharing is good for young people - it was the making of DS-and I don't understand moving out only if you can afford to buy.

I have no idea how they will buy homes. Will think about that later.

But surely if you're married and own property you shouldn't get a council house too!

Because staying at home enables them to save a deposit

Yes..But not all of us have homes big enough for 4 or 5 adults. And their partners.
I don't allow partners so they have to move out if they want them staying over!

I think this is a great idea. However I had a very strong urge to leave home and move to the city and would have gone completely mad in this set up. But if it works for your DC then why not.

I think it's a good plan if it works for you, it's personal isn't it - i wonder if they would just prefer to sell it and split the money though.

I flat shared when I lived in London in my 20s, I'm sure it's more expensive now but it was quite fun and a great way to meet new people plus much more affordable than renting my own place. I couldn't have paid for my own 1 bed or save a London deposit even on a 50k salary back in 2010, but house shares were OK and a way to be sociable.

I think the old fashioned approach of "turn 18, get a steady job for life, put a deposit down and buy a starter home" is definitely unattainable now in many ways. So it's probably a case of working out the best way to support your kids (helping them qualify for high paying jobs vs buying them a home vs supplementing rent etc etc). It's nice to be able to help and very kind and supportive of you. It's the people who don't have any parental support that I feel for (not that it's their parents fault at all, for some people it's just not an option, which is understandable.)

Personally I wouldn't advise splitting a large family home unless it is London.

Young professionals can buy houses/ flats but what they all want is forever homes (3bed+). That's the problem along with stamp duty and legal costs.
We started in the 1980s with a one bed flat and a 100% mortgage. It was cheaper than rent. Moved up through the number of bedrooms and proximity to London. We're now downsizing and single storey properties are in great demand and very expensive.
I'd sell @Notbuiltforheat and give them a deposit. Fresh starts and all that.
Our son lived with us rent free for two years thus saving enough for a deposit.

Yes, it's not going to suit everyone. But the ones I know who've done it have made a success of it. But I think it only works if there are strict rules and people arent in each other's faces. I remember years ago when I was studying and in bedsits. My door and the man opposite's door must have been about 3 feet away from each other, but because we came and went at different times of the day we could literally go for weeks without bumping.into each other. So in some ways it's not so much about space itself but about what you do in that space.

Yes I can 😂🤷🏼‍♀️. My daughter is on the rent book and the house is her home. The house will not be under occupied. The council are very clear they will allow it.

Milking it.

I don’t own the property. My husband does, a two bedroom flat. His two adult children live in it. I live in my council house with him and my dd. He’s not on my tenancy any more than I’m on his deeds. This is MY home. But you think when I got mattered I should have…. What? Kicked his kids out of his property so I could live there, while they got a council property? Wet will be moving into the flat in the next year or two and then all 3 adult children will live in the council house. And YES the council have already agreed to it as I have legal right to hand the tenancy to her as this is her home and it won’t be under occupied.

Green is a terrible colour on some people. I am not doing anything wrong or immoral in any way. I had a civil house when I got married. I kept it as his property was nowhere near big enough for all of us and we couldn’t afford to buy anything bigger. We pay rent. I’d out mashed you feel any better at all I’ve currently got a horrific indoor waterfall that’s producing 30 lies of water every time it rains and it blows my electricity every few minutes. I’ve also got a terrible ongoing mold issue. My kitchen hinges are rusted solid with the damp. plenty to be envious of im sure 😂🤷🏼‍♀️

My kids having a savings fund (premium bonds) for their first house mortgage. They are 9&10!!

thankfully our house is big enough for them to stay and save. 1 likely to go to uni the other not so I want them to at least have a decent amount saved for when they’re a bit older. Once they are working and if still living under our roof it’ll be the third rule (1/3 to saving, 1/3 for house keep/bills (we plan to give this back to them but times may change) and 1/3 spending money. I’d love to help them out more but at least this gets them a head start.

I know a family who live in social housing, they have 3 adult children, two sharing a bedroom and one in a box room, one bathroom between them with no separate toilet and the only living space is just big enough for a two seater and a chair.
No dining roon and no space for a table in the living room or kitchen and nowhere to put a Christmas tree up, no parking as there’s a pathway leading to the row of houses.
They will rent it for the rest of their lives and then the adult children will have nowhere to go and no inheritance. They all work hard but only minimum wage jobs.

I can’t imagine any of these 5 adults are happy in this situation but they can’t have a lot of choice if they are all still there.

Where I live and houses are commonly split this way, most people don’t have cars. DH and I and our grown-up DCs, all living together, don’t have cars.

We are planning to downsize and kids can live here in uk in that smaller house and we will relocate to Europe. We will have a base in the uk that way and get to spend our later days in the sun overseas too

Do you think all three of them will want to stay in the area? I can't see my two wanting to stay in their home city. It would be different in London, for example, but alot of people like to move - or they meet a partner from elsewhere and move there.

We have a rambling old terrace so our two could technically share it, but I think they'd fight like cat and dog!

They should pay you rent, even if you don’t need it. With the money you don’t need put into a secret savings account for each of them.

What will happened if it doesn’t work out with your new partner, if you separate he will want half of your new place which, being smaller, you will not be able to buy a place for yourself at a low price?

As your big house is in the town you grew up in it sounds central, which when people are older and lose their mobility need facilities nearby, doctors hospital etc would you be able to move back?

Oh no, don't do it.... this has happened to me and my siblings, It's like some kind of living dictatorship hell and if I could afford to leave I would just sadly I can't right now (but I am saving hard in the hope to be able to by the end of next year)

My parents did this thinking it was helpful and kind to help us all out and at first it was fine until one of my siblings met my SIL, they now have 4 kids squeezed into a two bed apartment, she is vile, constantly tries to bully us all out to get the whole house back as one. It is like living in one of the episodes of neighbours from hell but with your own family.

Do not get me wrong I am very grateful to my parents for helpings us all certainly at the time in my life when I really needed some help, but hindsight is wonderful.... I wish they just sold up and lived their own life and if they wanted to help they cld of given some money to each of us.

Sell up and split the money between you so they can at least have a healthy deposit on their own shoebox

@ShinyBadger I suspect that my two living together as adults could be like an episode of the classic soap opera Dallas, the siblings scheming against each other while living in the same house. 😂

They do love each other, but they don't want to live together longterm!

We’re in the SE and both of mine have managed to move out.

Neither of them earn a great deal.

Bravo. A one bed flat around here is £250k and it’s the same for miles around.