Do you lend or gift money to your adult children?

[Nextones]

Hi,

for those of you with adult children, do you ever loan/gift them money?

if so, does it cause any issues- not repaying etc?

When they started work we bought each of ours a car and paid for the first year of insurance etc.... with the expectation that they would "buy the car off us" after 12 months (by instalments if necessary). This really helped them get started. DS and DD1 have paid us back; DD2 is only two months into her first year.

We also help them out ad hoc if necessary, although the three of them are very attuned to "fairness" and would complain if one had more handouts than they did. We quietly transferred DD2 some money earlier this year, as she was on a zero hours contract but not getting any shifts.

Do you silently judge the inlaws for not giving you the money and expecting you to pay them back?

No, I am grateful for anything we get and understand no one is made of money but I guess it do silently compare then to my Mum who doesn't expect repayment.

I do a bit of both

My dad is still basically keeping me alive, as work have cut my hours to around 5 a month and apparently I'm over the benefits cap for UC. I'm looking for another job but I work in hospitality and don't have weekends free because I have to look after my teen son with ADHD and his DLA isn't high enough for carer's allowance. I'd need to completely retrain. UC are trying to help me find training.