Anyone up ?

[NellieShoe]

I need support please

Hello. I'm begrudgingly up - nine year old autistic child is NOT a sleeper.

What's up? Are you safe?

Hello, what kind of support do you need? What’s going on?

I'm here.

Hi it all came to head last night with my now ex partner. After months of him saying cruel things lacking accountability and manipulating everything I say all because I dared to question if he was cheating on me. and now my cars ruined and im
bruised all over

The man I loved so much isn’t recognisable

Oh sweetheart, where is he now? Has he left? You need to call the police. Do you have a friend, neighbour or family member who can be with you, do you need medical attention? I think you need to get checked - please please call the police x

It’s my own fault Al I wanted to do was resolve everything. He never listens he isn’t kind he says cruel things to me and when I lost it emotionally he still said cruel things. I was in the car he was driving. He said another cruel things and I tried to get out the car to escape the hurtful words and make it stop I don’t honk I wanted to die. Anyway it was impulsive and dangerous what I did. It happened a few times me opening door and him grabbing me to stop me and braking sharply and all the time I was being screamed at and I’m bruised all over

He tried to say I was mental but I’ve had months of his emotional abuse.

Where are you now? Are you safe? This isn’t your fault

I’m in the same house. He’s in bed spare room sleeping soundly

How hurt are you? Can you pack up a few essentials and leave the house?

Can I clarify is it unreasonable for me to have asked the question ? which acted as the catalyst for all of these months of toxic behaviour.
all he keeps saying is how dare I question him

It’s my home I have nowhere else to go it’s co owned with him.

I’m bruised all over and my necks jarred. Sorry to drip feed

Are you in the UK? Is there anyone you can call who can come and get you? It’s entirely reasonable to have adult conversations with your partner. And it’s entirely reasonable to not expect be emotionally and physically abused. You deserve to be safe x

I am in the uk yes.
worse thing is my cars ruined and I need it for a job that I am due to start in near future.

My parents are elderly. My friends have been recently bereaved. My adult daughter is away the weekend

I wish I had the presence of mind to record him on my phone but I was caught up in the moment. Perhaps if I had it would validate me ?

You don’t need validating - you know this is wrong lovely. What advice would you give right now if it was a friend who was in this situation?

I do need validating though it’s gone on so long I’m questioning myself. Have I made him like this. ? Is it abuse ? I’m a good person so I don’t like to think so. I wanted to resolve our differences by talking but this has gone on for months and came to a head

This is abuse

The worse thing is when I met him all those years ago he saved me that is how I felt. He restored my trust in men only to become my abuser . It’s only the last couple of years he’s changed and got mean.

I’ve tried to make him see that he’s cruel to me and he says me saying he has no empathy for me is belittling him. Yet he can say I’m mental. Evil. Etc.

The only validation you need is to look in the mirror and see those bruises!!!

Nobody has the right to hurt you physically or mentally like this.

You have to phone the police. This will not end and will in fact escalate.

Please be safe.

You should phone the Police and you should end the relationship, but if you don't feel ready to then please contact Womens Aid ASAP. They'll be able.to support you and give you good and practical advice about what options are available to you. It feels bleak now but there are ways out and support is available.