How many women are regularly coping with only a few hours' sleep?

[fudgy]

I am curious just how many women are struggling though the day regularly on only a few hours sleep? The past year and a half I've really struggled. I get the odd good night or even few nights but mostly I fall asleep easily and sleep for about 3 to 4 hours then I wake up and that's it. I've done all the things, saw my GP (not much help, they only give meds short term and then you need to stop and the insomnia returns if they meds even worked at all) did cbt-i, tried the usual supplements, got on hrt, practice good sleep hygiene, upped my exercise, I didn't ever drink anyway so no booze, no caffeine and so on and at best I get improvement for a week then it all goes to shit again. Looking online it seems that there are a lot of women relying on strong antihistamines to sleep sometimes for years.

I am curious just how many of us are really struggling here? I am at the point where my life is barely worth living and I am so envious of people who can just sleep though the night. I feel like I live such a healthy life but my lack of sleep means I always feel horrible. I tend to mask it as much as I can because I don't want to bring my family down but it's also sad to feel like I am just performing at life instead of being actually present due to exhaustion. I don't think I am depressed either because if I get a good night or two I feel so much better and so joyous really.

So please tell me how you sleep so I know I'm either not alone or some kind of medical freak. I think Ideally I want to know how you sleep if there are no obvious impediments like a new baby or young kids but really anyone can respond!

@Touty I'm the same at least 7 hours to not just be surviving. I am probably going to get some Phenergan today as I don't think I can cope with another bad night, but I am concerned about long term use.

@MollyAngeles I think the new medications for insomnia look good but my GP said even if I were to get them I'd only get them for a few weeks as a "reset" then I'd have to do without them. I'm not sure why this is exactly as they are supposedly not harmful to use long term. Also HRT has been useful to fix other issues for me but doesn't seem to help my sleep so it's not a panacea the Daridorexant is probably more useful.

@shrunkenhead I kind of get this as I probably used to feel this way when I was younger and had no problems sleeping, I just really can't function on too little sleep so I just had to get longer and now I just don't sleep even though I really prioritise my sleep.

The biggest thing that helps is to accept it and not worry about sleeping. Easy to say because I don't have small children and I'm retired. It's having to get up that makes lack of sleep matter.
Napping would help but I've never been able to nap unless I'm quite ill. DH could nap standing on one leg.

@TheBluebird I have tried that it is something recommended by the sleep coach on youtube but it doesn't really work because even if you find that zen state at night and just relax and rest you still don't fall asleep and you still feel shit all the next day. As you say it's not really possible for many of us to nap and even if I do I can't sleep then or if I manage to I wake up feeling even worse. It's torture!

Can I join? I have never been the greatest sleeper - but since menopause it has been worse. HRT sorted out everything else but sleep. I take Magnesium and 5HTP, have tried Ashwagandha, Melatonin and CBT-i. I can't take antihistamines as I have a paradoxical reaction to them and they make me feels anxious.
I retired from a stressful job a month ago and my sleep is even worse! I usually get an hour at the beginning of the night then I' up and down all night, not usually falling asleep until 3am. I'm literally getting around 3 hrs a night every night. I'm hoping it is worse because I'm adjusting to a big life change but it's crippling me atm. It literally feels like somehow my body has 'forgotten' how to stay asleep.

It could be the cost perhaps. As I can’t have HRT or CBT-I the GP said they were happy to keep prescribing them. I’ve tried amitriptyline, not great for sleep and the next-day grogginess is intolerable.

Kirkland's Sleep Aid. Buy it from the USA.
My main peri symptoms were crippling anxiety and insomnia. Hrt sorted it.

I’m also adhd well audhd, and I have the complete opposite issue. I do struggle to go to bed if I’m hyper focused on something but I also have 3 nearly 4 children. I can generally fall asleep as soon as I get into bed and if I struggle, caffeine normally wipes me out so a coffee before bed helps (not for anyone who doesn’t have adhd😅)

I have always functioned on very little sleep but as the poster said it can’t be healthy. I do have days where I am completely exhausted but mostly can function ok

Me. Hip hurts when I lie in one position for too long so that wakes me up.
Child has outgrown her bed and I have to save for a new one so until then she's in with me, which isn't particularly conducive to sleep.
Plus I get hot, have to get up for the toilet, then it's morning and the trams outside are starting, and then it's time to get up.

I have the slow release 10mg melatonin, that's pretty good.

It's one of those things that I think men are more likely to get a dual help with.

Can I ask how do you manage getting off to sleep? I know all the sleep hygiene stuff but it doesn't work which makes it hard to stick to. My most effective method is to stay up until 2am because I know I can successfully fall asleep then - but no one is going to help me while my self discipline is so low that I am staying up until 2am IYSWIM. This would be ok if I were vaguely functioning but I am really not. If I go to bed at 11 I'm tossing and turning until 4am.

I have zero problem falling asleep. I read a couple of pages and can't keep my eyes open. I'm so tired in the evening I could go to bed at 8pm. However I wake after 90 minutes to two hours and then can be awake another 3/4 hours.