Is there some all-inclusive social etiquette I seem to have missed?

[packingcubes]

Just curious really…

I’ve just got back from holiday and all the reviews and Facebook groups absolutely RAVE about the animation team- how friendly they are, how inclusive they are and how they chat with everyone, they are the second family etc.

Meanwhile, I got asked once if I wanted to do aqua aerobics and once if I wanted to buy a kids T-shirt… and that was it. I kept seeing them sitting and chatting with other guests very regularly, hugging there children etc so I started wondering if there’s some kind of secret all inclusive social code that I completely missed. Even my kids were pretty much ignored (although they couldn’t care less or even notice)

I’m genuinely not annoyed, just a bit baffled because I’m friendly and chatty and was by myself too with the children… yet I somehow seemed to be invisible.

It did have me wondering whether there’s some kind of all-inclusive etiquette I’ve somehow missed… or whether I just really am the least interesting person on the resort

This is insensitive bordering on offensive on a number of levels.

I’m like you op, I always wonder if people knew the team already by how they seem to be best pals within an hour or arriving.
however I’m also always completely baffled why on earth anyone would want to talk to them. I’m on holiday, im trying to relax and spend time with dh and dc, I’m practically naked in my bikini, no I don’t want to make small talk with a 20 year old stranger who’s being paid to talk to me.
I dodge hotels where people talk about this too much

Was it Turkey by any chance? They usually do this in order for people to spend extra money on things like photos etc or, they're weighing up a good tip at the end of the holiday. They may have assumed you didn't have as much, being a single mum. I'm a single mum too by the way and I take the children away a lot on my own.

I’ve been known to hide from them so you were lucky

@Yerdug yes, scary post I thought

I love chatting to people on my travels.
Isn't that what it's all about in life?

Meeting others and hearing their take on life...

I travel solo though. Love it.

I went to my first AI recently and found this odd.

No one approached us so we must have had a look that said no thanks.

One evening the entertainer said "if this is your first time here, give us a cheer" the second, third etc. They got as far as a group who had been there 19 years in a row and eere "like family". Lovely hotel but who the fuck wants to go to the same place 19 times in a row?!

Some people go to the same place year in year out so know the staff well. Some people throw themselves in to the hotel activities and enjoy every element and get to know staff that way. Where you are around the pool makes a difference as they will usually do a lap but might not go to the set back loungers.
We are not massive joiner ins so we don’t get much attention except when my dd was in her teens they alway seemed to notice us then 🤮

Yes this
I don’t actually mean to sound judgy but all the photos with the bar staff, do they display them in there homes?
seems a bit odd to me but different strokes I suppose

It was!

19!!!!!!

I always think this is a weird reaction from people…..they think the animation team are their best buddies - they’re literally paid to entertain you, most likely don’t give you a second thought the minute you check out!

personally the idea fills me with dread - I’d be more than happy to be ignored by the forced entertainment police…

Exactly this.

The worst sort of entertainment/animation staff are those who won't take no for an answer and hassle you to play darts or water polo or whatever when you are clearly not interested. Most decent places will have someone making an announcement and then leave it up to people to decide whether to participate or not.

Agree that if you do go to the yoga or aqua aerobics they will get to recognise you and come over to chat. In places we've been recently the kids' club staff are not the same people are the entertainment staff usually.

We went to Mexico last year and the resort has its own fan page and irs like this. People are so defensive of any issues guests have, and they post images of themselves with fhe staff, call it home and go back regularly,

when we were there there was this man and woman there, who were regulars, and I felt so sorry for the staff, she bought them all little crappy gifts, hugged them all, posed for many pictures, was all weepy,and she took a good half an hour of their time. The staff you could see were just being polite,humouring her, but clearly wanted to get away, she kept trying to keep them there, then one got caught at the end, and she sort of segmented them off, to keep talking to them. There was a look of almost desperation on the employees face.

we were on sun beds right next to them so watched it all play out. But what became apparent was this was about her and a need in her, not about the staff. Her husband wandered off a couple of times, I think in the vain hope she’d come with him, but she was so intense there was no chance.

on watching it close hand I felt it cringeworthy, but in reflection it was really inappropriate and these guests need to learn boundaries, these employees are being friendly as they are paid to, it’s not your home. They are not your family, and it’s not ok to put them in that position.

if you’re craving to be thay woman though, then you need to proactively engage, as the staff really aren’t looking for that, you need to drive it.

Whereabouts in Turkey were you? We were there earlier in the year and similarly the Facebook pages raved about the animation team. I just found it all a bit creepy (and very naff). Like you OP we weren’t approached other than the guy from the spa once, which suited us! Even the hotel photographer gave us a wide berth - must have thought we weren’t very photogenic 😆

I think you have to engage. Otherwise, they leave you in peace.

We went to an AI resort last year (first one I’ve ever been to). The animation team engaged with the people at the ‘busy’ pool and kids who were interested. I have zero need to be entertained. I like to read my book in the shade and sit in peace. None of them said boo to me. It was great.

If you engage then they will engage.
I don’t really so I mainly get left alone. Which is how I prefer it.
My DH likes to join in and so did my children (still do for certain things) when they were younger so the animation staff would pay them attention and ask them along to things.
Good ones will take their cues from you.

Im never approached either. I would like to be involved but im too shy. Im also partially sighted and maybe thats read as hostile or stand offish because I cant read faces or recognise people. I may have resting bitch face I guess.

It’s their job to suss out which adults and kids value and enjoy a more intense interaction, and from what you’ve described neither you or your kids would particularly welcome it. I hate being approached by animacion when on holiday and so do my kids and although I’m not rude or frosty or anything they largely leave us alone.

I’d be delighted if the animation team
left me alone. I hate being rounded up for group activities.

I had never heard of an Animation team. Ot does sound like a fun job tbf.

I was at the Tresanton in Cornwall a couple of weeks ago, and there was a very young waiter who honestly was the most brilliant person talking (very posh accent) to people I have ever heard. If someone was sitting alone in a corner he would go up and simply ask if they had come here to be alone, and if not he said he was certain he could come up with something clever to say.
It sounds a bit like an animation team. 😂

Fun but they work hard! Up early in the morning for aqua aerobics, kids club in the day, still on in the evening doing the mini disco and karaoke.

I am sure they do. They must sleep well at night..

If it is a Spanish hotel then Animation/Animacion is Spanish for Entertainment so makes sense

Yes.
You have to behave as though they are a cross between a celebrity and your best friend.
You learn their names and say them a lot.
You tell them they are wonderful and talented and offer them drinks.
When they approach you get your children to shout their names.
You volunteer to participate in the entertainment (the more foolish you're prepared to look the better) because you ARE the entertainment and their job is easier because of you.
You are the first up for games, karaoke, and doing the resort dance which encourages othef guests and makes their job easier.
You return to the same hotel multiple times (where they pretend to remember you)