Why do I feel so evil sometimes?

[incrediblyevilperson]

Be nice please lol. NC for this.

Basically I have a really great life. Lovely home, incredible husband who is very attractive and a super high earner, great career of my own, I'm told I am beautiful, in great shape, funny etc etc. We go on tonnes of foreign holidays every year. I'm very close to my family and in laws and have great friends. Obviously it's not all sunshine and roses and no one's life is perfect but for the most part I know I'm very lucky and have worked very hard to get to where I am.

I know I have it sooo good but I just get so impatient sometimes and snap over the smallest things. It honestly makes me feel like such an evil person. I don't know what to do to fix this. Anyone else felt this way?

Evil? You're not really up there with Stalin.

I reckon you’re bored.

What the heck does your so-called beauty, perfect life and comedian-like ways have to do with being occasionally snappy and short tempered? There's literally no correlation between the two.

Okay evil was a bit far haha. Just feel like I have a very short fuse sometimes and it makes me feel like the worst person in the world. Just last night my DH booked a lovely trip for us and this morning I was in such a bad mood and accidentally escalated a small issue into a way bigger argument.

I just mean I know I have a lot to be grateful for but sometimes I feel like I go and spoil it

As in I've started the thread because I'm bored or I get snappy/grouchy/moody because I'm bored?

You’re allowed to have a range of moods @incrediblyevilperson having a fortunate and pleasant life doesn’t mean you’re not human and human beings can get cross, frustrated, tired, grumpy and so on. That’s normal. It would be a bit Stepford if you glided around with a half smile the whole time.

I don't think you're as happy as you say you are.
Happy and content people don't lash out and escalate arguments.

I mean it's not all the time but definitely more than I would like. Maybe a few times a year I'll just feel it all building up.

Do something high intensity weekly, boxing, or something that gets your heart rate up. It helps brain deal with stress and ‘fight or flight’, loads of psychology into it but basically, you’ll be less frustrated

Thank you, that's reassuring. It honestly makes me feel guilty to be in a bad mood or unhappy as I feel like I have a lot to be grateful for.

Hardly evil. What's the trigger for you getting impatient and snapping? Are you tired, hungover? Are there certain things like driving or being in a supermarket that raise your stress levels and make you less tolerant. Are you naturally an impulsive or impatient person, or is this out of character for you? It could be you're just angry at yourself because you've got all this stuff but something's missing and you're guilty for feeling like that.

Humble brag.?

@incrediblyevilperson it sounds like you’ve been told in the past, perhaps by parents, that it’s not ok to be cross or any other negative emotion because you have things to be grateful for. Is it something that you were told growing up? It’s not a great way to handle negative emotions. Especially as it’s also causing additional guilt and worry!

How old are you?

Is your irritation throughout the month? Or at certain times?

Is it anything and anyone who could set you off? Or the same people and issues?

Could it be that you’re just around some exceptionally annoying people, who do really annoying things?

You sound irritable because there is something missing from your life and you don't yet know what it is.

An easy, comfortable and affluent life that most others would envy can still be a dull and unfulfilling life. Find a purpose. Find out what it is that you really love and set about doing it.

Pmt? Sexual needs unmet? Emotional needs unmet? Hidden ptsd from childhood / crap blokes?

No matter how good life is, we all get snappy at times. We’re human. 😊

@incrediblyevilperson
I suggest reading some history books.

You know those (usually) girls in primary school who do a drawing which is really detailed and coloured within the lines etc. When they have finished they often put on a sad face and do a loud sigh. If no-one notices them they start saying “it’s rubbish, I’m rubbish at drawing”.
Within a couple of minutes a flock of follower girls, who haven’t grasped the manipulation technique gather round complimenting the drawing and the girl’s ability and suddenly the original girl is all smiles and the pecking order has been strengthened once again.

Using “evil” to describe yourself here reminds me of this.

Probably when I'm feeling very tired and overwhelmed or anxious

@Charmingpls I saw one of your posts but I think it was reported so I couldn't reply. The purpose of giving the background was that I feel I have a lot of good things in my life which makes me feel even worse about not being grateful. I'm not saying I have the perfect life or I don't have things I would improve or change.

I've always been told I shouldn't complain or moan because there are people in the world much worse off than me

Late 20s

Definitely worse the week before my period. Not every month though.

Probably mostly by DH but that's because I feel most comfortable around him and like I can really be myself. And I spend the most time with him.

No I think I'm the annoying person 😅