Neighbours kid peeping over our fence

[Nws93]

Sorry I wasn't sure where to post this, hopefully somebody can give me advice.

We're having a few issues with our next door neighbours eldest son (8) peering over the backyard fence CONSTANTLY! Their youngest son is 3.
It has got to the point where we cannot go into our garden without him popping up whether it be 8am or 8pm. I dont mind if our own children (8 and 6) are in the garden as they do talk which is nice. But its becoming a problem which has been highlighted more now the weather is nice.
Yesterday (kids off school) it got to the point where I was getting a bit annoyed that he was interrupting and trying to undermine me getting my 2 in as they had started to fight over something, it just made the whole thing worse and its not the first time this has happened. then husband was in the garden doing some work (8.30pm) and the kid pops up again trying to get his attention. We have told him many times to get down but he doesn't listen and for whatever reason his parents are not telling him despite us having a chat that we dont mind now and again if the kids are in the garden too but it is not nice when we are trying to relax and hes there constantly or is undermining our parenting our own kids. Hes 8!
Theres many more incidents where hes constantly undermining me with my own kids and whinning about stuff and throwing rocks and toys into our garden to get our attention. Its like having a third child that i cant tell off and I feel like I cant just pop out in my pjs because hes always there.
I feel awful, Im not sure if hes lonely, but its too much and although his parents apologised and know it's an issue hes either not listening to them telling him not too or they dont care.
At this point I dont know what to do, I dont want to ruin the friendly relationship with our neighbours but at the same im at my wits end that I cant use my own garden without him there. Does anybody have any suggestions?
Oh and we tried fence trellises but that hasnt worked either.

Thanks in advance for any advice.

I think he wants a reaction and he is getting one.

If it was me I would just completely ignore him.

As for the rocks, I would just post them through his parent's letterbox. They might get the message.

We had this with a kid who used to live next door. He must've been around five or six when they moved in, and started peeping through the hedge at us in our garden. I ended up telling him very loudly and firmly to stop it and go away because he was being very rude. It worked. I'd have spoken to his parents if it continued.

FIRM telling off. Not gentle bullshit. "Johnny, stop that right now and go inside".

And then, tell your neighbours that it's unacceptable and they need to stop him from bothering you.

I would continue to tell him off, gradually more and more sternly. It might be uncomfortable but imagine yourself as a primary school teacher.
X please stop staring at us / talking, that is rude.
X this is not acceptable, please go talk to your parents if you want but we are trying to relax and don’t want to chat.
etc
Could you also call his parents from your garden when he is doing it?

I would be telling him to fuck off from the outset but I have no bandwidth left!

Being as you have spoken to this feral assholes parents and it's still going on, all bets would be off here.

Must admit, I do agree. If both him and his parents aren’t listening, all bets are off on what to tell him next.

It won’t hurt the kid and maybe just do him a favour to show him to do as he’s told.

Every time he does it go knock on their door and tell them to sort their kid out, they will soon get sick of it.

Some sort of pop up gazebo with walls? They're not that expensive and handy for shade.

Hose to the face should do it. Kids are a lot like cats. You have to catch them un the act and make it unpleasant to continue.

Can you imagine if little Jimmy went in to his Mum to tell her Deirdre next door just told him to fuck off? It would be a great moment of learning for all concerned.

If I could have a pound for every time I was told "Stay off them fucking bales" when I was a nipper! Didn't do me any harm!

I had to double take, I could have written this! My DH and I have been getting increasingly pissed off with our neighbour's 8 year old doing this all week. If our DS is in the garden he asks if can come and play in our garden (I always say no, as my DS doesn't particularly like him, and the neighbours kid can be bossy and cheeky). If my son isn't there he asks me to go get him... FFS. I also say no, but he still asks again. I am always clearly telling my kids not to do this as the neighbours need privacy, and I tell my kids LOUDLY so that next door's little angel hears me. But 8 year olds don't get hints. I really like the parents, but I do not like their kid. Roll on winter!

Just tell him off.

Mountain out of a molehill. Be an adult. Tell him to go away and stoP it.

Brilliant!! I bet the OP never thought of that!

Oh, wait, she’s done it loads of times AND put a taller fence up, so, what are the magic words that she needs to use that’ll make him stop?

I’d be turning the hosepipe on him.

Jeez. The fucking audacity of the brat

Just go round , knock the door and tell his parents that unless they stop him from doing it you will be telling him to stop and not in a kindly or age appropriate manner .

Grow some roses along the trellis. Prickly ones.

You’ve asked nicely, that didn’t work. I don’t know why you don’t feel you can’t tell him off? Shout at him to pack it in and get down.

Put up some trellis at the top of your fence, if you don't make it difficult, or impossible for him to do this he won't stop

I don’t have an opinion but i do have a funny story. My neighbour’s toddler used to look through my letterbox to see if he could see my dog. I didn’t care because he was a toddler, dogs are cute and i’m not a twat. (I could hear the parents always trying to stop him but toddlers can be quick and door opened to the street).

anyway one time toddler caught a full frontal of me with no clothes on (my own house! On my own! Just walking through!) - i gather he then relayed this to his parents who thereafter made Absolutely Sure their child did not peek through the letterbox 🤣

Get your dc supersoakers.. prizes for how many direct hits get get ndn with.

We had an awful neighbour who used to tease the ddogs through the gates. Hosed the fucker one night..his meat head df came storming along. Told him I was cleaning my patio and his ds had his nose in my gate..
Didn't happen anymore.

This has made me laugh way more than it should have done...still giggling

He must be standing on something high and dangerous to be looking over a 2m fence. Asking the neighbors it move that object surely has to be the way forward?

We do tell him off if he does something dangerous (i.e throws stones). Ive tried chatting briefly and then telling him to get down, but 2 minutes later hes back.He tries to undermine my parenting by telling my children that they weren't in the wrong and basically shouldn't listen to me

You’re being far too nice - and that’s why he’s continuing to do it. Tell him off the minute he sticks his head over. If he continues, shout at him - “NO! Get down and stop staring at us!”

I can’t believe you’re putting up with a child interfering and nosing at you in your own garden. He’s not 3, he’s 8. He knows he shouldn’t be doing it, but he carries on because you’re not strict or loud enough.

Go round and ask his parents to move whatever he’s standing on. You say you want to stay friendly with them, so think of it as doing them a favour. One day someone will really lose their temper at him, so you’re helping them by insisting they sort it.

That would be an easy one - nerf guns smashed against the wall while he watched

well the guns would have gone in the bin