What is the worst year you’ve had, what happened?

[Daydreamer94]

So I have had a really rough 18 months. It feels
like life just doesn’t want to give me a break. I had a very traumatic birth, nearly died and had to deal with severe PTSD. My baby was then really ill for the first year of their life, getting COVID twice, having a dairy allergy, extreme eczema and multiple hospital visits. I was then made redundant whilst on maternity leave (discrimination), and became very stressed about finding a job and pulling my hair out with anxiety. Finally found a job only for it to turn out to be a toxic mess rife with bullying, high-school drama culture from women you would expect to be professionals. Started to experience very physically symptoms of chest pain, hair loss, sleep issues, stomach pain and decided no job is worth it. Back to being unemployed and we were supposed to buy a property this year! I am just so done. I feel so hopeless and full of anger and the way my life seems to be turning out. Tell me about your worst year/s - did it all work out? Was there a rainbow after the storm. I need some positive stories :(

Police knocked me out of bed at 1.20 and told me my daughter had killed herself.

She had died from a DVT. I had to rake the police over the coals over it as did the coroner. An aggrovation I could have done without.

I will say though OP. Take the medications you're offered. You wouldn't do a broken bone without meds, you wouldn't treat a physical illness without meds. Your brain is no different.

Sometimes we need some chemical help to make sense of the world.

Jan 2025 going forward has been awful for me.

Well, I only found out in April 2025 what as going on, but with hindsight it started then.

Things got strained with the inlaws as they wanted to come and visit right before christmas with very little notice. Usually I'm up for that, but it was DS2's birthday, we had plans involving other people, a classmates birthday party that would all need changing, and the house would been to be prepared all for a 36 hour visit.

Christmas was fine, underwhelming, but a stressful visit from friends that were unwell caused stress as well. Then the big thing of STBExH coming out in April. I wrote a thred about it on here, got called homophobic by a poster and it all snowballed into a big debate, it got picked up by the Sun newspaper, I ended up getting it deleted which was sad as there was a lot of good support on there too.

Turns out he'd been having sex with random men online, so needed a visit to the SRH clinic too. Then my beloved cat died later in the year in quite a traumatic way.

Finally got the house on the market, didn't sell which was stressful, I spent loads of my annual leave sorting the house out, cleaning, DIY, STBExH did nothing to help things.

I'm now in my own house with the kids 50/50, which wasnt a straightforward move due to STBExH. Not out of spite, just becase he didn't really care about getting his paperwork in order.

I am praying things get better now!

Twelve months between autumn 2024 & 2025 - I was diagnosed with breast cancer in Oct 24 following an a&e admission for something else, had surgery and then discovered my DH had pancreatic cancer following an a&e admission for jaundice. We both went through chemo at the same time, then I had radiotherapy and was given the all clear in the summer. Less than a fortnight later my DH died following surgery, he never recovered consciousness - and it's been a nightmare ever since. I am broken.

2020 absolutely the worst year of my life, and one which I'll never recover from

Started good in January with a new baby in the family, then covid hit and it just got worse

At one point both parents in different hospitals (not covid related), mum ended up in a care home in Nov and it was the beginning of the end for dad, who eventually died 2023 and mum last year

Then Christmas Day, my beautiful son in Australia took his own life, then 2 elderly aunts the same week, although their deaths barely registered

I often think that if covid hadn't happened then maybe my son would've came home and things might've turned out differently, but its all ifs, buts and maybes

OMG Gamerchick!

How the Hell have you survived all of that?

They told you your gorgeous girl had committed suicide when she had a DVT? ? Words completely fail me. 🤬

I am so, so sorry you had to suffer that. 💐💐💐

Separation from exH - he left me - and then my mother died 3 weeks later. That was a bit of a tough year, to put it mildly.

Fuck! I am so sorry! That sounds like hell. I pray it does too! X

Summer 2022 - date

Dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer at 62, had to watch him fight and suffer for nothing really, as we lost him last year. Life is just sad now and always will be.

Omg! I am so so sorry! I have a daughter - that broke my heart. How are you even surviving?! Thank you for sharing that with us, I wish you healing xx

2021
My dh got ill, diagnosed with metastatic colon cancer, we got married in hospital (had to chose which one of my 4 dc could attend) and then his death 8 days later..all in the space of 3 months.

I then was diagnosed with heart issues, ptsd, dd3 was diagnosed with PTSD aged 11 and then she couldn’t leave the house much for 6 months.

Then to top it all off, a year later my mum was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer and then she died a year from that.

its now 2026 and I’ve got a horrible feeling that history is about to repeat itself with regards to my own health.

Reading what other people have gone through makes it pale into insignificance, no family members have died except my lovley cat, but lets all just keep plodding on, it can't rain forever!

2024, my 21 year old daughter dropped dead.

This is really heartbreaking, I’m so sorry.

Lots of deaths including my grandmother and my wonderful stepmother.

trigger warning further down

2021-2022. Eldest terrible behaviour problems turned out to be something more (autism). He was expelled from school. He had no friends and was bullied and so lonely, but being young and developmentally behind he didn't understand why the other children didn't like him and he was never invited to play. Put him in a special school as it was the only place that would take him at huge expense subject to an EHCP. It took a year and a half to get the local authority to agree to fund it and cost us £100k between legal fees, specialists and school fees. Had to remortgage the house and had a horrendous winter where we couldn't afford to have the heating on we were so broke. Had to borrow £50 from my parents to afford my son a birthday present.

In the context of all of this unexpectedly pregnant. It was still during post covid working from home and I work for a US bank that notoriously fires pregnant employees so didn't announce it. Baby died at 23 weeks and the NHS wanted me to deliver in clinic. I had to fight to have surgery as I didn't want to be awake for it, then I hemorrhaged and was in hospital for weeks with internal damage. Husband couldn't face the grief and I had to do the funeral on my own whilst he took our other kids away for the day.

The cherry on the icing of all this was I was violently attacked whilst on a business trip. Assaulted, beaten, strangled and left for dead. I was so traumatized it took me a few days to fully recollect what had happened (I was on autopilot and cleaned up, packed my bags, got on a plane and came home). I have some lasting brain damage because of the strangulation. I never told my husband as he would freak out. I told him the bruises were I'd had a bad fall.

Annnnyways. Things are way better now. My eldest is now very popular and loving his special school. Other kid good. I didn't manage to get the guy who'd assaulted me charged (it was in a different country with a slow moving legal system) but I did manage to tell his employer as he worked for my client. I know he was fired and no other employer will touch him. I hope he dies of something painful. I made new friends and got new hobbies and life is pretty decent. I just got a promotion. Life's good.

It'll improve, I promise x

I am so, so sorry for your loss.

The people on here who have lost children - well nothing else even registers.

After I was attacked I had therapy and the therapist saying it was the worst thing that could happen to a woman. I just laughed and said no, something happening to my children would be the worst thing. Nothing else compares.

My GM died then six months later my DM was killed in a car accident at 69. We’d already lost my dad at 54 years earlier. Her new partner was driving and at fault. He also killed another woman. We had to liaise with a coroner and eventually go to crown court, organise a funeral and empty and sell the family home of over 50 years whilst juggling work and two young children. Ten years ago this year.

Mine is pretty minor compared to everyone else but it was about 10 years ago, we were selling two properties and trying to buy a bigger one. Sale of property 1 initially very stressful, then OK. Selling property 2, where we lived that feel through, purchase feel through, DH's job was at risk suddenly, car got written off, got hit by all fees for failed sale/purchase, DH was talking about going freelance which meant that probably no one would give us a mortgage, but we were in a 2 bed flat with two growing kids and I had started to imagine how we could cope living there for 3+ years while DH built up enough credit as freelancer that we could get the mortgage. We manage to just skid into getting the mortgage and move to a big enough place before job came to an end but it would have been a nightmare if we hadn't made it

But is this going to be supportive for you OP?
Because I know already that im really only interested in MY worst year and can only empathise with yours but is a competition on how bad I've had it helpful for what you've been through?

Oh my god! Are you ok? Xx

no it’s not a competition and I am naturally a really empathetic person. I suppose it makes me feel less alone if anything. Social media is rife with e eveything that is going well in peoples life and that makes me feel like a big FAAT failure, even though a lot of these things are out of our control, sometimes you can’t help but feel why me? Where are my good days coming.

Oh sweet Lord! I am so sorry, how horrendous! You are incredible just to be here after all that, thank you xxx

2020

March 29th...my mum died, alone in hospital (covid)
May 16th...told I was being made redundant ( after 6 weeks on furlough)
June 18th...DP had a serious seizure that landed him in hospital where he caught covid and didn't come home for 2 weeks ( I wasn't allowed to visit)
September 19th dad was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer
November 2 dad died (at home with me and my siblings with him)
I only saw my DD twice during that year ( in January and at dad's funeral), due to restrictions and hearing/seeing her on the phone/facetime overwhelmed with grief and anxiety and not being able to hug her broke me.
And to top it all off in December my car was vandalised whilst I was at my new job and I couldn't get home. I was 15 miles away and I had to sleep in the office (it was 10pm and there were no buses and I didn't have enough money for the £60 taxi fare to get me home).

I'm surprised I remained sane come 2021.

Childhood sexual abuse. Learning difficulties, withdrew didn't speak for a year. Apart from one word answers.was taking mini over doses at the time. Didn't eat as i should. 17/18 ish was still in contact with my abuser. He apologised for what he had done. I left without telling anyone no knew where I was i had taken myself to a hostel. I didn't eat for 28 days. Eventually I allowed staff to contact an older sibling i stayed with her for a short while. Went back to live with my dad. Had put him through hell due to him not knowing where or why I had gone. He was honestly the best dad in the world and didn't deserve that.
We got close again. I had 2 children. Social services involved for a bit because found out my then ex had fractured a child's skull. So there was a risk to my children. There had been brief DV only the once. Because I wasn't going to let that get deeper. My dad got cancer I looked after him till he died.
I had more children. My relationships never lasted. I can't hold down a relationship. Got evicted under section 21 was in temporary accommodation for a bit. Got into another private rent. Got evicted ubder section 21 again. Temporary accommodation again. Dd was had a baby. In a dv relationship heavy involvement with social services for at least a couple of years. Went as far as plo. Thank god dd got through that situation. DD and her children got moved and so did my family unit. Under lide in danger. My younger children had to carry a photo of dd ex on paper with instructions of what to do it he tried to approach them. Before moving both homes had alarms and cameras. And bith addess were marked had to get cabs everywhere paid by social services. Her ex ended up doing 3 years in prison thats settled now. Dd has bipolar and other mental health issues which have had a big impact.
My middle ds went down hill after covid refused school. Because aggressive and violent towards me. It did come under dv but because hes my child it often doesn't get recognised. There's no escape hes 6ft 3 much stronger than I am. He was also self harming and tried to kill himself. I did tell him to leave ky house because I couldn't cope anymore. He went into supported accommodation.

Things are better now. I no longer let myself get pulled into adult dd stuff. I stopped doing so much for dd. It was alot I didn't realise how much I was neglecting myself and my home. I didn't even realise that was the problem till after. Ds completely turned the corner and is doing much better in himself. Hes much kinder to be around. He has a girl friend they often stay here. When hes not here he calls in video a couple times a day feel like a massive weight has been lifted. And things are becoming much more positive. But yeah life is starting to feel normal.

Sorry massive trauma dump there.. didn't mean to write so much it kisy went from obe memory to the next

Oh gosh yes I can relate to a bad 18 months too. It started with a perianal abscess which turned into a fistula and is still not resolved as I was then diagnosed with breast cancer. During this time my dad had a very rare autoimmune disease and had a full mental breakdown which lead to him being sectioned. His mental health improved and we had the old him back but he then passed away from an infection. A week after he passed, my close friend ended her life in a traumatic way and my other friend passed away after falling into a river when fishing. Trying to parent two toddlers through this has been tough. I just want some peace to heal now.