What’s the stingiest thing you’ve ever seen a friend do?

[zappp]

I have an (ex-)friend who is very stingy. She earns plenty and is happy to splurge on herself and show off, but when it comes to others, she is mean with money to the point where I’ve felt really taken advantage of on multiple occasions. It’s almost like it’s a game for her; seeing how little she can pay and how much she can extract from others.

The friendship fizzled out when I started calling her out on it and stopped covering her costs (I previously didn’t want to make things awkward, especially in a group setting, but it got to a point where I was too pissed off to keep being polite).

Against my better judgment, I recently attended a group dinner that she was also part of - a mutual friend was in town and this was the only time we could see her. In the WhatsApp planning group, she’d enthusiastically agreed to the restaurant choice - it was definitely a nicer place, but not extravagant.

When she got there, she claimed she wasn’t hungry and didn’t order any food, only to ask the waiter for an empty plate and help herself - rather generously - from everyone else’s food!!! She also asked for a glass for the wine we’d already ordered, which would’ve been fine, except guess how much she chipped in to the bill…? Exactly, zero.

It was also a bit embarrassing towards the restaurant; it’s hard to get a reservation and the group was small enough that it was strange for one person not to be eating at peak dinner time, especially as we were seated at a big table.

This time I didn’t even bother calling her out - it was so brazen that she basically called herself out.

I know you never truly know someone else’s financial situation, but she’s certainly spending enough on clothes, holidays, and skincare to make me think she could afford a plate of pasta and glass of wine…

Anyway, rant over, I want to hear other stingy stories!

My grandparent has a lot of money.

My cousin does not. They went shopping for Grandparent and it was £9.65 total.

Grandparent wouldn’t pay them as they only had a £10 and my cousin didn’t have 35p.

It was about two years ago now but still makes me very angry as my cousin was a single parent and wasn’t working at the time and had very, very limited funds and actually had to ask me to lend them the money to get the shopping in the first place.

Disgusting behaviour.

she could well afford it believe me. either way if she wanted it back be upfront and straight when offeering to pay After I used to do her tax refund paper work for her. I was shocked how much money they both earned. they earned more money then both my husband and me have ever. I managed to get her a refund of over 4k for one year too. with no thanks nor offer of payment at all. she stopped asking me then after a she complained big time about cost of something and I made a dig in front of whole family don't dare crib about cost considering how much money you earn.
my own in laws are very generous opened my eyes to how family can be - at the time I was sick they had very kindly paid for oil and a coal delivery that year.
this is the same mother who on my birthday a year later ( husband again was working away ) invited me for dinner and said she had cake for me. she bought the cake half price in tescos served me a slice and wouldn't allow me to bring any of it home. packed it away as she said she would have it for the rest of the week the birthday cake she had bought for me. there was no present by the way.
I ended up being diagnosed with endometriosis not long after being sick - all related - have had 12 surgeries over the years to remove many cysts. she knows nothing about that as she wouldn't be nice about it
also been dignaoised with long term chronic pain also knows nothing about it as again she wouldn't be nice about it nor any help. other mothers I know would be different as I know

Friend invited us out for dinner for her birthday as part of a big group, we were both unemployed at the time having just moved back home after uni, the restaurant had a set menu, something like 3 courses for £20 which we ordered with soft drinks, friend whose birthday it was ordered 3 courses from the main menu plus lots of bottles of wine and coffees so it was way more expensive, when the bill came I said ours was £20 each plus the drinks so £25 each and she looked so angry and snapped ‘no, we’re splitting the bill’ which would’ve made ours more like £50 each, so I just said ‘well I’m not, I’m paying my own bill’. I couldn’t get over the cheek of expecting unemployed friends to sub your bottles of wine. Haven’t accepted her offer to eat out again since!

Thank you. I have learned to not let it get to me at all. I keep a polite distance from her. I may not have much money but will help and try as much as I can I couldn't watch people I love suffer. I am lucky my in laws are so nice and we're very generous to us in hard times. I know if we ever got into trouble tomorrow they would drop eveything and help us whatever way they could. I know I couldn't ask that of my own parents

So true!

My SIL invited us for brunch and called us the day before to ask how many sausages and bread rolls we would each eat ? I had a husband and teenage boys at the time with big appetites .Needless to say they ate before we left.

She was organising a birthday breakfast for her Dad (my FIL) and as I was helping her with it she gave me a list of half the food that I was to pay for .

ExH - moved in to my house after we'd worked out shared living costs. A week later he left his job and could no longer pay (I was young and stupid, I should have kicked him out there and then). Moaned for years the one time I asked for a black Russian in a bar because it was SO expensive. Expected to have a roast type dinner cooked for him every day, would happily put the items he wanted in the trolley, but struggled to put his hand in his pocket. We went on holiday, which I'd booked and paid for. He took £50 worth of Euros with him for two weeks, only paid for his beer (no food or any of the activities we did) and came back with cash left over (late 90s). Made no contribution for his daughter when she was born. Shortly after I see sense and kicked him out I had a stay in hospital. He looked after our daughter and moaned and whined because he'd had to buy a pack of nappies! If we went to someone's house, he'd check under the sofa cushions when he stood up in case he'd dropped some shrapnel! Obviously he paid hardly any CM, sent birthday/Christmas gifts a couple of times and after not seeing DD for over 10 years, he met up with her empty handed and didn't even buy her a drink.

My husband was out for a very rare meal with his friends. Our baby son has very complex needs so life is challenging. Well while he was out, before they’d even ordered food, I had to phone him to say an ambulance was coming for the little one, so I needed him home.

he stayed home with our other kids while I went in the ambulance, and one of his friends popped in with a takeaway from the restaurant that they’d all chipped in for, to make sure he could eat something. Out of 7 friends, one of them refused point blank to chip in, I think it was less than a fiver per person. These are people he grew up with from childhood. Absolutely baffled me, but I was thankful all the others were so kind and thought of him x

I don’t think that’s stingy at all - it’s blooming sensible. Halloween tat is overpriced anyway and it’s not as though it dates: ditto Christmas gift wrap, cards etc.

My friends father gives her into trouble if she boils the kettle too long or puts more water that required. He only boils once and only allows water for two cups.

I hope that was the end of the friendship!

That’s not stingy, let alone incredibly stingy. Do you ever think to pay for her half? I bet the answer is no, because you have kids to pay for. Just because she has a good job (which no doubt she works hard for) and doesn’t have children why would you assume she should pay more than half the bill?! Your friend is a net contributor: probably a higher tax payer, and hasn’t used any publicly funded maternity or school resources. Maybe you should treat her to a nice meal to thank her for the tax she contributes to your kids’ education and health services!!

My late , lamented very sweet but stingy, MIL once was at a do where she was given a free sandwich. She chose cheese and tomato , when we asked why she’d had the tomato, which she doesn’t like, she said “ well it’s free so I thought I’d have it” .
she then took all the tomatoes off before she ate it ! 😂

Yes! He also briefly dated my best friend and told me she was no good in bed; so he had a mouthful off me! Myself and my husband don’t bother with him any more, he’s not a nice person. Our lives turned upside down and our friends have been absolute rocks to us, others showed their true colours x

No comment on the situation but just to say thanks for the lovely memories of B&L and the Hac - how good was Manchester in the late 90’s. RIP Manc nightlife.

My ex once bought an item to fix something in my garden. It cost £20 and he said he was happy to pay halves. Generous you might think, but I was really broke at the time and didn’t have a spare tenner until pay day so he refused to fix it until I got paid. He lived with his parents, paid no rent, and had a good job. Out of principle I refused to pay the £10 so the item sat in my garden unused for about a year until we finally split up and I gave it to my Mum!

Went to a nightclub, entry was £5 each cash only. Friend only had card so asked if I could pay her entry and she’d buy me a drink inside, I said yes sure. Got inside, she buys the drinks and then proceeds to tell me my drink came to £6 and asked me to transfer her a quid.

We were going to a cathedral in a city where entrance was free but you could make a donation. I paid a donation via my bank card. When asked if she wanted to make a donation action my friend announced oh no we are all together!!

I think the point the poster was trying to make is that her friend is only happy to do 50/50 when it makes hers cheaper and doesn’t care about the other person footing a couple of extra quid for her, but will always make sure she doesn’t end up footing a couple of quid for anyone else which is indeed stingy.

Also the suggestion that someone should pay for someone else’s lunch as a personal thank you for their tax contributions and never having taken a maternity leave is quite literally one of the most barmy things I’ve ever heard 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Keeping the same teabag to use all day.

Why should he have paid anything for this in the first place? It was YOUR garden not his???!! The entitled cheeky fucker is YOU in this!!!

That's very sad.

Eh?

you sound very confused about who the tight one was.

In that case the poster didn’t explain it clearly and I read it that she was assuming her friend should pay 100% for her as she has no kids and a good job and could, in theory, afford to. Hence my second comment - but to be fair do those with kids think about the services they use that those without don’t?

the lady was getting a £120 spa day gifted to her and wouldn’t pay a measly £6 for the car park