If you won big on the lottery, who would you tell?

[Kingdomofsleep]

I haven't won. (Yet?!)

But I do kind of love reading fascinatedly about the lottery curse, how big winners tend to fall out with their spouses and friends and family. My DH says we could prevent all that by telling nobody. I then asked if that included our parents, who help us out financially in a modest way sometimes, as we ought to tell them we wouldn't need that any more. Dh said we'd tell just parents. But MIL, who is lovely and I love her, is the town crier and would tell her whole village within minutes without thinking.

I've got a ticket for tonight's draw and I find myself idly worrying about this as if I've won the 15 million pounds already or however much it is.

There are ways to be discreet and not flashy and still enjoy life. If you don’t broadcast what you’re doing then people take very little notice.

I don’t know that I would tell anyone apart from my husband. If it was BIG I would tell my parents and one of my 5 siblings. Another of my 5 siblings I would send a decent amount of money to but wouldn’t admit how much I’d won. Not sure about DH side - up to him!

I would tell DH, but no one else. If it was enough that we wanted to give some people substantial amounts of money, if plausible, I'd say it was from a bonus or stock options (things people think we have a lot of because we've worked in start ups for decades - we don't). I think it's less likely to cause bad feeling if others think your money is "earned". But the alternative would be a smaller win. Agree with not telling people the full amount.

No one would know bar dh. I’d still work as I love my job, probably move house but that would be “mortgaged” and us selling our house and rental properties to afford it along with dh job. We are not rolling in property but we both bought a flat when younger and then our modest house together.

honestly no one would bat an eyelid as we go for meals out when we like, days out when we want. I belong to a fancy gym, we have nice but not flash cars. The only upgrade to life with be dh retiring from his job but he would still work shore side doing something as he needs to keep busy. There would be no major lifestyle changes from the outside that people would notice bar a house move which is easily explained.

I’d keep exactly how much quiet. I’d have to tell them we won something though as our lifestyle would change and I’m not cut out for only fans or a life of crime so I’m not sure what other excuse I could give. 😂

My husband and kids. I think we could absorb a £10m win without anyone else noticing. £200m would be more of an issue!

DH and I talked about this when the euros was over £100m, and said we’d tell the kids /my sibling/parents we’d had a small win (like suggest we’d won a normal Saturday night lotto and wasn’t just a sole winner). Then outside of that, hint at an inheritance or an investment going well.

We said we’d probably move to a bigger house, but stay in our town for social reasons so that limits how big we could go, we’re not going to be dropping £10m on an estate - a house upgrade, a new car or two, some slightly fancier holidays - I think what most people would see would fit with either a small win or a decent inheritance.

(Sadly we are at the point in our life where parents generation are dying. We are seeing sudden changes from those who get a chunky inheritance from parents /childless aunts and uncles etc. if a care home wasn’t needed. It wouldn’t stand out that much if we didn’t buy sports cars or actual Manor House.)

I think about this when I buy a ticket. I would tell as few people as possible and pay to get good independent advice. I would want to help certain people out a bit financially without leaving them a tax bill.

I look at property websites just to see the nice house I could buy with the millions I have yet to win.
If I won this I would leave where I currently live for a number of reasons and move to a city about 2 hours away. I lived in that city in the past and would be in a position to buy a home in a nice area. I could say that I got an inheritance that funded this as I have a few elderly relatives that died over the past few years.
I think that you need to keep quite about a big win because some people would expect you to give them money and then complain about the amount you gave them.

I have had some people in my life that have been generous tomme money wise or time wise and I like to return the favour to them.

I would not tell anyone until I had the money invested or parked in the bank as an interim.
Depending on how much it was, I might need to move countries for a while before giving anything away.
I recently discovered that, where I live, although the actual winnings are tax free, the sums you can give away are pretty small, 20k for example, only every 10 years. Any more than that or more frequently and you pay 30% tax. Same with gifts from regular income, the taxman would only sanction about 2.5 to 3k a month and would want to know why and what for!
If moving proved too complicated, I would look at setting up a trust.
My family might suspect a win, if I bought a house, had my old one demolished and rebuilt or started doing a lot more travelling than I currently do, but as we live quite a way from one another, they might not notice or be that curious.

I'm completely alone, no family of any sort, never married or had kids - both of those by choice - and nobody that I consider to be close friends, so if I won, and I never could because I don't do it, I wouldn't tell anyone!

@Kingdomofsleepthats much what we did. We live in a wonderful house with a huge garden - surrounded by woodland and overlooking a green. There’s no through traffic, it’s just really nice. It’s one of the more expensive homes in the town but not a mega mansion.

invested in pensions and education- DD has no student debt) and I’ve got a car I love and don’t have to work.
Money in trust for DS and DD to buy homes etc .

Thank you for the book recommendation. I downloaded and started it last night and I’m about a third of the way through it - had a two hour wait for an appointment so it was very timely. Jake is a twat.

It has cemented my view that I would not tell anyone except financial advisors for at least 12 months whilst I worked out how best to invest the money. There are people I want to help who I would then tell I’d won some money but probably not the full amount.

You need tax advice if you gift or invest the money. Gifts because of inheritance tax, investments because interest is taxable and assets maybe subject to CGT e.g second homes.

Tax advice means you can make tax efficient decisions before you gift/invest/spend the money rather than having an unexpected tax bill.

Added That’s really boring I know 😂 but I have spent time thinking about this.

My mum is the only person who would know where it came from and how much. Even my OH would be told it was an inheritance from some long lost relative and a very small amount. Same with DD as she has a mouth the size of a small country 🤣

Yes definitely worth getting financial advice if you'll be getting income from it. I just meant you don't need to declare it on your self assessment (but you would declare the income if applicable).

Interestingly I think the Set For Life lottery, which gives you £10k a month, is taxable, I was reading the Ts and Cs as I'm hoping to win that this evening ideally (!)

I think depending how much you get, you could for example pay off your mortgage and I don't think that would require paying any tax.

My parents, under strict instructions to not tell my sister cos she’s a blabber.

Id carry on working, but move to a low stress part time job so nobody would be suspicious of where I was getting money from. I’m not far off ‘early retirement’ so would probably do that when I get to 56/7 and pretend I have a huge pension.

I’d prefer to win the set for Life than a huge amount in one go. I already have the first few months already accounted for.

You definitely don’t have to declare the win on your self assessment. Paying off your mortgage is also fine.

It’s more if you gift £1m and sadly die within 7 years then you are looking at £400k IHT. There are ways to legally reduce IHT liability etc. that wealthyindividuals already use. Think Trusts, Family Investment Company etc.

We would tell my parents and my husband's two sisters. We wouldn't disclose exactly how much we'd won. We wouldn't tell my husband's brother, because he'd be constantly wanting a hand-out and sadly, I think he'd sell us out to the press, if he thought it would earn him a few quid.

Obviously it would very much depend on how much we won. I would try to say I'd come into an unexpected inheritance from my Godmother. No one would particularly know if that was true or not.

DP and DD would be the only people to know. It would be easy for me to keep a huge win secret as I've no interest in buying a big house or a fancy car. I'd just buy a 3 bed bungalow on a small plot of land and get a newer 2nd hand car. The less my wider family know about it, the better.

@Kingdomofsleep they are taxable in the USA though. Which I think is crazy!

Id tell my dad. He'd be so stupidly happy for us. Id be laying his mortgage off with a big enough win anyway, so he would need to know. Same for my in laws. Id not tell my sister or sil. Or id tell them we had a minor win.

My adult DC would be told the full picture.

Best friends and extended family would be told a watered down version…

Immediate family siblings and parents would know because I’d make sure they were given large amounts as I’d want them to be on an equal footing. I’d want them to be able to join in if we decided to go away somewhere exotic for Christmas!

Otherwise no one other than my financial advisor. I’ve learned that even good friends can be resentful of what they see as your better fortune and critical of private lifestyle and spending choices.

I’m not a flashy person so doubt other people would notice. Charity donations other than your time should IMO be done privately.

My husband, straight away. My sister when I'd worked out a plan of how much to share with her. My parents alas wouldn't take it in, so no point in telling them. No one else. Assuming the win was big enough, I'd quietly hand in my notice at work citing personal reasons and leave in a low-key way.

How would you manage the anonymous donation? Banks cannot accept large transfers / receipts without donor ID - same goes for law firms and other financial intermediaries. I’m sure there would be a way - just don’t know it.