What is an experience you never want to experience again in your lifetime?

[sooo4455]

The most stressful time in my life started about 7 years ago and went on for 2 years and my mental health took an absolute battering and im still not over it. And now im super paranoid about it happening again.

I had bedbugs and a rat problem under the bath at the same time and pest control were useless.
i had a toddler at the time and their was 7 of us and I was advise to put everything we owned (twice) in the garden while they tried to get the bedbugs under control. I had to wash every soft furnishing and beds, draws, wardrobes had to be emptied and placed outside in bags in the sun. Only thing that was allowed in the house was furniture. I had postnatal depression at the time and I just remember sitting in the garden with everything we owned (twice). With the rats they were running around under the bath and were huge. My bathroom is downstairs and they’d chewed from the outside in, the smell was not normal and the noise all day from them scurrying around 🤮
It finally got resolved after 2 years but at that point I was shot to bits. I don’t think people realise how traumatic it is the live with a bedbugs. I’m so paranoid about getting them again I try and stay away from public transport and hotels or I will research the shit out of them before booking and even then I’m hyper vigilant and can’t sleep.

What is something you never want to go though again?

I can relate to so much here. I posted about listening out for my dad's footsteps. It was awful when I was on the receiving end, but hearing him go for my brother was also awful - listening to it, but also (honestly, I still feel ashamed) the relief that it wasn't me this time... And my family is in pieces because of it too, though the violence and addiction long predate my dad.

So glad you have a sibling you are close to. I do too, having someone who was there can keep you sane. Look after yourself.

I totally totally get this about bed bugs and rats. I had bedbugs when I was renting a room in a lovely flat in Scotland.. I slept on the sofa for about three/four weeks all whilst rentokill came into fumigate the room twice. then I had to check everything before I boxed up all my belongings as I just had to move out
I had a rat in the house for two/three days last autumn.. my nerves were shot anyway at the time with other things and this almost tipped me over the edge. I could hear the thing at night, it was in my son’s bloody bedroom. Before I knew that, had pest control out. Paid around £250 round for bait.. then once I knew it was in the room next to mine, my friend and my son managed to get the bugger out. I had to bleach every surface in his room and clean the carpet as I was so paranoid about what diseases rats carry! I then frantically filled every hole I could find with wire wool . I still have no idea how it got in or whether the cat brought it in (it was a small juvenile).

I really really don’t want to go through either of those again. When the cat brings in a small mouse it’s still b stressful trying to get the thing out but rats…. It’s on another level 🤯🤯🤯

And watching my one and only child, my teenage son have a tonic clonic seizure. Sadly I dont think we’ve seen the back of them…not for good anyway 💔💔

It was the feeling of being helpless and powerless - as an adult I find it incomprehensible how anyone could do that to their own children. I’m sorry you had to go through that, but I’m so glad you have someone too that understands x

Telling my 7 and 10 year old that their dad had been stabbed and died . Most horrific experience .. worse than finding out myself .

Something fell into my cup of tea today in the garden.

Couldnt see anything floating - tipped it about a bit - nothing

Drank tea. Very nice.

Massive, solid, bird Pooh at the bottom. I have the photo.

Think it fell off my pergola 🤢

I’m sorry that you have had a similar experience. And I’m so, so sorry for your loss - it’s hard to know where to put it all when you are grieving what you desperately wanted but didn’t have (I hope I’m not projecting, and sincere apologies if I am).
I sometimes try to imagine what it will be like when my mother dies, but intellectually i know that I can’t predict how I will feel.

I see you x

When my dad was told he had a few weeks to live following a short but brutal cancer diagnosis. He was in a hospital out of our area at the time and it was during Covid so although my mum was with him for the consultation, she couldn’t stay. It was terrible when he died but what really haunts me is thinking about how he must have felt processing that news by himself. When he died I felt some relief that he couldn’t be scared or tormented by it any longer.

I get really anxious when my kids are unwell. Hate it. Sickness bugs in particular. Hate having them myself too.

Less horrific…the time I was looking in the mirror and noticed a massive spider sitting on my shoulder.

I never want to go through all the terrifying and terrible health problems I've had over the past decade, but unfortunately I can't turn back time and change things. 😢

I had a head injury and post concussion syndrome a decade ago, which was awful. So horrible that it gave me a dreadful breakdown, and I was then polydrugged with a lot of psychotropic medication, including an off label antipsychotic prescribed for severe insomnia and anxiety. This injured me permanently and gave me a neurological involuntary movement disorder called tardive dyskinesia that is a bit like Tourette's and Parkinson's disease combined.

Many of my movement disorder symptoms are bizarre, and quite terrifying. They include internal vibrations, involuntary movement of my face, mouth and tongue, and I also get the most bizarre sensations in my head, as though my brain is vibrating, or something is poking the inside of my skull, or that my thoughts are happening outside above my head.😳

Anyway.... all of these symptoms are absolutely horrid but in remission, so they tend to either be terrible when they flare up with something that aggravate them, or they are mild and not noticeable.

Of course, I am now extremely sensitive to medication side effects and I can't take certain medication that I could use ok before.

It's shitty. I was "normal" before being injured. 😢

You're not projecting at all and thank you.

Being dragged through the family courts by my exH while he sought sole custody of our DDs claiming he’d been alienated 🙁 They sadly didn’t want to spend time with him because he was frankly furious that I’d left. They felt his resentment and were continually being forced to choose a parent by him 🙁 It was the worst eighteen months of my life. He threw everything at it - the best ‘legal team’ money could buy all for revenge…I think I had PTSD for a long time! I’m so happy the laws around the automatic rights of parents are changing. I’d read such horror stories about what can happen and I lived in absolute terror whenever my children were forced to be with him 🙁

I’m so sorry for your loss. X

Several experiences I'd never want to live through again...

My 5 year old son being diagnosed with lymphoma, and seeing him go through horrific aggressive chemo (he's all better now, and 21).

Being bombed when I worked in a London department store when I was 19, then being held up at knifepoint in another shop I worked in later that same year.

Thankfully my life consists of many more joyfull experiences that I'd happily experience again in a heartbeat, and they're the ones that I draw from - not the bad things.

Similarly, I was forced to sing in music class in secondary school. Everyone got given a different assignment in a group of 3, some were told to play instruments, and our group told to sing. I was put with two other girls, one being my friend who really can sing.. then other could also sing pretty well.. I absolutely can’t, and I’m not being modest or humble, I just can’t sing 🤣 we were made to preform in a school assembly too. Possibly the worst thing to ever happen to me and it’s likely one of the school events that’s triggered my life long anxiety disorder 🙃🫠

The beginning of winter in 2022 was exceptional - deep snow and intense freezing temperatures well before Christmas. Many of my friends were out tobogganing, trekking and building snowmen together. My close friend’s grandchildren had never seen snow like this before and absolutely loved it. For them, it was the best time ever. For me, I was travelling 30 minutes each way on icy, dangerous roads three times a day, juggling looking after my family and visiting DH as he was dying in hospice.
So do I think the memories my friend’s grandchildren have of that time are unfeeling and disrespectful? No I don’t. I can smile at the memory of their happiness at the same time as I mourn the death of my husband. This is just… life.

Oh I am so sorry about your parents .
also sorry about your gastroscopy experience
i had Midazolam for mine and while I’d definitely say it was a very weird experience, I can’t say I’m worried as much about another one being done in the future.

One experience I never want to repeat was renting a car where everything seemed fine at first, but then I got hit with hidden fees and the insurance conditions were confusing. The car I booked wasn’t exactly what I got, and dealing with the staff was frustrating—they were unhelpful and dismissive. It left me feeling stressed and regretful for the whole trip, and honestly, I never want to go through that kind of rental ordeal again.

Having to cut my DD down from a ligature and perform CPR
Holding on to same DD as she hung out of a third storey window
Watching my mum die, then three days later sitting in hospital with same DD after she’d taken a massive overdose. I thought I was going to lose them both in the same week.

I was in temporary accommodation for a few years or so . They are not up to standard at all. One rat was found dead in the boiler. Also had mice. I saw one cockroach I guess there would have been more. Another temporary had millions of red ants they were every where. Had mice there as well.

In my last temporary the first night we were there we got eaten by bed bugs it was awful. My kids were bitten all over. My son got bitten and his lips swelled up really bad. I still have the pictures. It took the council 3 treatments to sort it.

In the same house we had mice and rats.
I found a rats head under my sons bed . I guess left by my cat. I saw my dog killing one. Was catching a lot of mice. I had my kick boards of in my kitchen. Took kids to school came home and on the kitchen floor poking out from were the kickboard would ne I saw this thing that looked like a leather handbag strap. I didn't own a handbag. Looked uo and there was a massive dead rat.

I actually made myself a vermin kit. I had mouse traps. Bed bug spray. Loads of wire wool. Expanding foam mesh. I litterly dismantled the kitchen as much as possible I filled holes in floors with wire wool and expanding foam plus I put mdf over the whole floor. I seakee where any pipes were best I could. I sealed tje doors shut neat the sink area. I used think woood to frame my washing machine so there were no gaps around it. I used mesh in all the air vents.
I did simlar all over the house. I even pulled the carpets up and sealed every gap between each floor board

I normalised it with the kids because I didn't want them to be scared. I told them it was a bit like having spiders in the house.

Sorry was longer than I thought kept remembering things 😅

That sounds awful for you. Hoping you go onwards and upwards. We never know what's around the corner and how our lives can be changed in an instant.

Thank you for your kind words. Yes, it is horrid and it makes me think about how the expression "There by the grace of God" go all of us.

I hope things will get better too, but i don't know how old age will treat me.

I feel for those who have had bedbugs. I never have and am paranoid about getting them, I read reviews of places I might stay at very carefully for any hint of bedbugs. I react very badly to any insect bites indeed
My first child was born in the maternity wing of a very old hospital. I saw a cockroach looking at me and wiggling it's antennae at me. First time I'd seen one. What a horrible thing to see when I was a day postpartum
Didn't go there again, went elsewhere for my second and third child

Right wing governments. They have ruined the country. Only the ignorant can say they haven't.

I’m not sure insulting anyone who disagrees with you gives you any form of credibility. 😂

God bless you! That sounds horrific! I thing anyone would feel the same after 2 years of that! I u destined people are posting about death etc yes there’s worse things but honestly you were living in an utter nightmare for 2 whole years! Don’t let anyone play down your feelings. Have you had counselling?