What do you and your DH do when you go out?

[ChangeAgainAgainAgain]

Our kids are now grown up, and DH and I have free rime. Jolly lovely it is to be able to spend time together!

But we've realised that most weekends we're going out for food or cocktails, and this isn't good for our waistlines or our wallets!

We don't like sport at all, so won't enjoy sports based activities or stuff like dancing or roller skating.

We've done all the stuff like mini golf/axe throwing/bowling at our local complex, and honestly find that stuff a bit 'meh' (and expensive).

Cinema, theatre etc are OK if it's something we're interested in, but not for every weekend.

We have enjoyed stuff like sip and paint or escape rooms, but again, not every weekend.

So what stuff do you do with your DH when going out alone, that isn't just eating or drinking?

Salsa classes!

Once the daylight hours are longer, we will do a long ish walk to the pub/restaurant, so whilst it's still food/drink, at least we walk it off! Just an evening walk in general, especially at sunset is nice, or lying in the garden looking at the stars/lighting up the garden fire pit (normally do drink wine with that though). Also do like the posh cinema, theatre etc. You can often get cheap tickets to smaller local theatres (or our local town often has comedians/comedy nights, which are a bit less hard-core than serious theatre). Do you like music (gigs/concerts)?

Concerts theatre cinema, walks, historical sites. We mostly eat and drink though

We go for walks and look for OS benchmarks 🤣

exciting! But we also have a small holding which keeps us busy and we both work full time so during the evening we chill.

We don't get to go out very often (still have primary age DC) but when we do we like to go for nice walks (with food at the end) or look at historical sites.

We have an outdoor theatre in our town which I have never been to but looks really good for an activity to do.

We used to go out to a restaurant about once a month, but I'm now trying hard to lose weight so we don't do that. We go to the theatre whenever there's something we want to watch locally. We both like shopping and garden centres so those are outings for both of us. We like to go to the beach to look at the sea. We like boat trips. We go swimming together every week.

We both used to work in hospitality so we don't enjoy going to the pub.

That's about it I think! We lead a very quiet life.

I'd booked us a gig on thursday so he booked friday off and planned the day.

We went to the V&A museum, had lunch there then bus over to a shop I wanted to get something specific for holiday then we had an uber (due to rain otherwise we'd walk) to the Connaught Hotel dh spent time car spotting. Stop in a pub due to rain. Did drinks in the cocktail lounge then walked to the Guinea Grill for our evening meal, train back to flat.

Today so far we've walked the dog up the river to Hampton Court palace, he had breakfast in a cafe I went into the palace to see their tulips (well worth it).

Later today our rugby team are playing so we'll sit down to watch that, I'm supposed to be packing to go home tomorrow morning but I'm on here instead.

On normal week days, we play tennis, walk the dog, take the car for a drive to find a different dog walk. Dh does jobs around the house like washing windows, seeing to his cars. I garden.
We do watch some tv together but I have my own lounge so like to watch my own programmes some nights.

Swinging? 🤔

Gigs, gigs, festivals and more gigs lol

@ChangeAgainAgainAgain you could join a seat filling service like Central Tickets..They distribute unsold tickets for shows and events, usually for much less than the headline price.

Also, if you live near a tv studio, seats for shows with audiences are usually free.

We've still got youngish (14 year old) ds so don't go out loads. But for birthdays and whenever else we can we go out out.

Gig if we can. Day pubs into the night if not. Hotel if we've got overnight childcare. We go dancing, drink shots and have fabulous sex. We've been together 18 years and LOVE these nights.

We have responsible jobs so letting our hair down and being care free reminds us of how to do us.

We do loads, love having older kids. We go out at least once a week, sometimes more.

We love the cinema especially an Everyman. We also enjoy theatre and comedy. Going out to eat with friends, trying new restaurants. We play bridge too and play with friends.

Daytime we’ll go for walks (with coffee and cake!), museums, so,etimes guided walks.

@ChangeAgainAgainAgain I get it. But I think you’re over thinking it. There are so many fun things to do in life and I for one want to make the most of them. We are also struggling with some difficulties at the moment and doing fun things is a welcome distraction. Sitting with difficult feelings is all well and good but I also don’t want to sit around feeling miserable when there are better things I could be doing.

I know this isn’t going out but we have a ‘dinner group’ of friends - 4 couples and we make a themed dinner ( Italian or French food for eg not dressing up or decorating the house we don't go crazy) and the host couple makes the main course then 1 couple brings starter/nibbles one brings a salad or side dish and one a dessert) we have a big group text and we all love cooking so it gets really interesting with what we choose to bring to go with the hosts main course - the host sometimes makes a themed cocktail but one couple is teetotal so there’s always a virgin cocktail option - the food tends to be healthier as we are all mid 50s and all watching our weight but it is a fun thing that we do once a month and rotate who hosts and we generally wear nicer outfits (not slobbing around the house clothes) and it is such a nice catch up as we used to see each other regularly with our kids but they are all at uni and if we didn’t arrange a night we would never catch up

Get a dog and walk it.

We go to the theatre a lot, and also to some immersive experiences.
Music and comedy gigs.
Classical concerts too sometimes and the opera occasionally.
Cinema - usually those NT showings of plays, but sometimes a film.
Art exhibitions.
Museum exhibitions if there's a special one that interests us.
Flower shows and RHS gardens.
Lots of walks - sometimes a day's hike in pretty countryside or a stroll along the Thames or through London. Occasionally climb a walkable mountain together.
We've done a bit of craft together - stuff like wood turning. That was fun.
Occasionally go to a talk or author reading.
Stately homes and castles sometimes.
Animal sanctuaries - otters, birds, butterflies.
Pick your own farms
Craft fairs and food markets.

Most often in the day we go to reasonably near towns, attractions or (in summer) beauty spots or the coast. We are English Heritage members.

If it's a town, we'll wander round the shops, look at any intestine sights and take photos, and have lunch somewhere, not a big or boozy lunch (neither of us drink) - something like a panini or a jacket potato.

If we've had a day out (which we do almost every weekend), I'm happy just to relax at home in the evening with a film or some music. We don't often go out in the evening, but if we do it's for a meal, as mentioned, we don't drink so it doesn't work out hugely expensive or unhealthy.

Find your nearest board game cafe!

I’ve not got too many suggestions as we rarely get time together as DP works away a lot and my health isn’t great. We don’t tend to eat out and i don’t drink so that’s not things we do.

But depending on weather evening stroll around the block then home and cook together.
evening walk at the beach enjoying the sunset we do this a few times per year, sunrise is also good.
go out for an evening or night drive, really nice can take a flask with you. Also good early morning.
just spend time in the same room doing different things , book, tv and so on.
we do a hobby evening one work night per week so we have an easy snack sort of supper and get on with hobbies, gets us through the week.
night time bird or animal watching, dusk is lovely.
we go to a nearby place to see the wild foxes a few evenings per year, take a flask with us as nowhere to get a drink, one of the best things which we both look forward to.

if I was healthier we would also go away one night a month camping somewhere, enjoying all the stars.

This might have been suggested already, apologies if so. Quiz nights. Lots of places round us do them, admittedly mainly pubs. I've bern to a few and they're a good laugh if you don't take it too seriously!

We don't go out in the evening often tbh, but we some times do: gigs/concerts (local-type ones, not big venues/names, so not very expensive). Pub quiz (no need to drink lots). We also both belong to a choir, so we do that once a week.

I feel quite exhausted just reading this thread! Never realised what a home bird I've become, but I love it. I do have a horse though so that keeps me busy and I'm pleased to get home, bath and bed mostly!

I was thinking puzzles/games, or learning a creative skill together at a class that you could spend evenings practising at home?

Another idea might be volunteering for a cause you both support?

Challenge yourselves. Try something you think you may find hard. Learn a new language - evening classes, dance classes. You'll meet new people. Do it individually if you prefer different things.

DH and I have no kids. This week as an example we've been to the cinema together after work one evening, been to Ikea one evening (does that count?!), yesterday we got the train to the coast had a walk on the cliffs, went on a big wheel and then had dinner in a restaurant when we got back into our city. Today we're doing separate things but tonight we might go to the pub for a bit but prob won't drink.