Why would one family have so much neurodivergence

[telewubbies]

I’m autistic, my son is autistic, my sister has quite profound learning difficulties and asd, my other sister has adhd, two of her kids have adhd, I’m sure my mum also has adhd. My brothers ds is autistic and he himself is most likely undiagnosed as he’s always had his ways !

Do you think alot of families are like this ? It just seems every one of us has something and it seems like alot.
Obviously it’s a genetic thing but I wonder what actually causes those genetics?

My sister in law's family are pretty much all autistic apart from her, but her son with my brother is showing strong signs of being on the spectrum so I assume it is hereditary even if neither of them have it.

On my parents side nobody is autistic and neither are any of the children. I didn't realise it was hereditary until I heard if what was happening in her family.

ND people marry other ND people and make wonderful ND babies. It’s really not complicated.

My extended family is full of us as well. It’s great.

Hereditary, and also ND people tend to get attracted to other ND people in my experience!

This ^

My whole family are ND and my partner (passed away now) his family were severely autistic but he was AuAdhd and always in trouble when he was younger, an absolute nightmare due to the ADHD . I always say if he could’ve had kids our dog is definitely his child !!! He’s def his Dads son 😂 I laugh sometimes and am convinced the dog is my former partner in reincarnation coz he’s a pain in the ass like his Dad was 😂

Because it’s hereditary. My dd1 is autistic & dyslexic, dd2 is dyslexic, I strongly suspect I’m autistic, DH is dyslexic and has ADHD (he was diagnosed as having “hyperactive disorder” when he was a kid, I’m pretty sure my dad is autistic, my nephew is being investigated for ADHD and autism.

Definitely hereditary, but I think there must be environmental factors too. The previous generations in my family seem to have been high(ish) functioning. The younger ones hardly at all.
Whether it is diet, screens, schools, I don't know.
I guess UPF and spraying neurotoxins on everything can't help.

But also unfortunately untrue.

Whilst people with certain types and levels of neurodivergence may function well in society, there are numerous people with more severe levels and a myriad of other physical and mental heritable conditions who unfortunately have extremely difficult or restricted lives.

People with these conditions still reproduce and the conditions remain in the human population. Your comments seemed to imply that only people with positive aspects of heritable conditions would have evolved to be able to reproduce, given you say " nature does not make that kind of mistake". Unfortunately that is clearly untrue and nature does indeed make that kind of mistake.

You are fortunate that the issues in your family have not prevented you from living full lives. However people who, for example, have severe ASD are not able to live in that way. I think of my sibling's friend who has a son in his late twenties with severe ASD. He will never be able to live independently. His condition has had a hugely negative effect on his parents' and sibling's lives as well as his own.

neither me or my ex are autistic yet all 4 of our children are. i have 5 siblings and none of their children are autistic either, i do wonder how all 4 of mine ended up being autistic

The fear of what will happen to adult children with complex needs when their parents die is a source of huge stress and distress.
My dc have made the conscious decision not to have children for this reason.
The world is not a kind place.

I have autism & ADHD, I'm pretty sure my mum is autistic, my ds is as well, my brother has always refused to be assessed but has so many traits it sticks out a mile, both of his twins are diagnosed, one of them severely & will never be able to live independently.

Well it didn't come from nowhere. At least one you will be ND of some kind.

It's genetic. ND people also tend to get together with ND people. Then have ND kids. At least they all 'get' each other.

Sure it’s genetic, but compared to a neurotypical brain what is it that causes those genetics to wire our brains differently?

Like a pp said, some behaviours would have been beneficial for humans at different times in evolutionary history and they have been selected for. It's nowadays the lives we lead are very hard for our brains to deal with (whether we have ND or not) and so these traits are seen negatively.

I also wonder about all the micro plastics, weird non-food stuff in food, hormones and antibiotics in the food chain and waterways etc......

There will be autism somewhere down the family line. Lots of adults don’t think they’re autistic but they’re just “high functioning” (hate that term) and never received a diagnosis.

I only found out I was autistic last year at the age of 36. My dad was in his late forties when he was diagnosed.

Definitely this. ND people “get” other ND people and so on and on it goes. I’m autistic, DH has ADHD and I suspect autism as well. It also runs in his family though there are no official diagnoses as everyone was “high functioning” enough not to need support.

nope neither of us are and even if we were as mentioned not a single person in mine or exes family is either so odd that only our children are

None of you are that you’re aware of…

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Just so you know, your original post is still visible.

Yes, genetic and ND people tend to gravitate towards each other.

I would put money on my dad being on the spectrum (he's in his 80s and managed to get by in life just being described as "a bit odd" and "set in his ways"). My mum seems NT but has a very clever techy cousin who also seems extremely spectrummy. My sister and I each have a son with diagnosed AudHD (and I also have ADHD) which is really unsurprising considering they had a double dose passed from the generation above us.

Have you all been assessed then ? If not, how can you say for certain ?

Exactly this. There is now a large population of people with autism who are not living full lives and will need life long support, this is not a life they or their parents would have chosen. In fact, most of their parents are absent as they cannot cope with their support needs.

Exactly. It’s very common for adults not to realise they’re autistic until they have children because they see their children’s neurodivergence as normal because it’s exactly how they behave.

My dad was diagnosed when I was in my teens and it was only then that he realised I was probably on the spectrum too - even then it took me another 20 years to receive my diagnosis.