What's the most privileged/off the mark post/response you've read?

[waywardways]

I've name changed for this, just in case anyone does an AS and accuses me of getting DM fodder.

Me and the DC had to flee our home several years ago and we were moved into a tiny 2 bed flat temporarily. I made a thread at the time, saying me and 3dc had had a traumatic move and were very overcrowded and asked for advice on how to store our daily stuff in an efficient way.
Several posters replied helpfully, linking shelving units/freestanding storage, but one poster replied along the lines of:

"Your DH must be high up in the army and you have to rough it in officers housing until your 5 bed detached home is ready".

Another poster quoted the above with "This was my immediate thought too! It's so hard OP, but we've all been there".

I found this both amusing and perplexing because a) I would never have assumed the above and b) it was so far off the mark.

There was another thread very recently about food guidelines where the lack of awareness and privilege was quite frightening!

@Emori You're right in that there are some things in M&S that are the same price, but most things are more expensive, especially fruit and vegetables (which are the bulk of my shopping). And I don't agree that the M&S things are always nicer. If I did my main shop in M&S, it would be far more expensive.

this and the strange belief some people on here have that 60 to 70 is a young age and there is no way, absolutely no way to die in your sleep in that age gap without long term illness

And ... Those that think only old people need carers and that because they can climb Mount Everest with a health condition, someone who is bed bound by theirs is being enabled by their carer!

Ok. I'm exaggerating but you get my drift ...

of course it’s a chunk of cheddar, that’s the only way to go for morning cheese coffee combo, obviously!

Oh yes, reminds me of a recent thread where posters were insisting it was really common for people in their 70s to run miles every week.

They have no clue. I always just answer, "Oh, I just couldn't handle it if my child died," or something like that, with, "Yes, you could because you wouldn't have a choice." Or, if they say something like, "I couldn't handle it if my child died. You're so strong!" with, "I don't have any other choice but to be strong. My other children still need me."

My father once screamed in my face after he found out I didnt have house/contents insurance

I was scouring the streets for pennies to put together to buy food and nappies,insurance was well beyond my grasp but he couldn't see this

I didnt have insurance and that was unacceptable (I do now)

Same bloke disagrees with any form of credit-its debt and debt is to be avoided at all costs

'If something expensive breaks,just pay cash for another one' is his attitude

My washer and dryer both packed up within weeks of each other and dp bought another on credit as it was the only way we could afford to replace them

It's getting paid off over 6 months rather than going without for 6 months while we save

Some people just dont have the spare cash to pay for things let alone thousands in savings that they can dip into

Im bloody lucky dps credit is good enough to sensibly borrow (mine isnt)

There are so many of those high earning ones where they seemingly can't afford to live on their 100k. It always causes me to panic job searching for a bit as I earn a fraction of that 😳

Yes to both of you.

My mother was only in her 60s when her spine began to collapse because of osteoporosis. She was on crutches by the time she was 70 and bent double shortly thereafter.

A family member's partner was apparently hale and hearty until he was found at home, dead of a heart attack in his mid 60s.

I constantly find myself bewildered by the number of posters who think that all grandmothers will be fit enough to provide childcare.

I'm in my 60s and trying to keep myself going as best as I can, but there's damn all that I can do about my osteoarthritis and I live in fear of the family osteoporosis. (Yes, I'm on HRT and exercising but that didn't stop it from hitting my mum.)

The woman who had 4 toilets and wouldn't let her husband poo in any of them. Queue lots of laughter and discussion. At one point the OP announced, but nobody in today's society has only one toilet!!

I go to a Senior Flex class. We had to explain to our instructor that our knees would not, in fact, allow us to do star jumps.

So you’ll accept that middle-class kids whose parents paid for their driving lessons, tests, and bought them a car and paid for their insurance are privileged in comparison to you who worked hard to pay for it yourself? And you, in turn are privileged that you were able to pay for lessons, compared to somebody who was getting up at 5am to work just to be able to afford food/rent and would never have a spare penny left for driving lessons.

I drive, but I still understand that driving lessons are a luxury to people living hand to mouth. And having Mumsnetters acting incredulous that someone doesn’t drive, because they have no excuse, is out of touch.

Very much a 'come and comment on my thread and marvel at how rich I am'.

I started a thread not that long ago titled “to think 100k is a high salary” and got a pile on

It’s a privilege that you could afford lessons, the tests, the insurance, the tax, the maintenance, the services, the breakdown cover and the cost of a car.
There are lots of people who work hard and can’t afford those things

I think @SelbourneIdentity has missed the point a little - no one has said cooking, driving or having tampons is a sign of privilege

it’s the expression of disbelief and astonishment that other people don’t - and even that that’s an indication of lack of character or failure that’s the sign!

that empathy you mention

I'm just going to tell you you're doing really well and to keep going. Well done for what you've already achieved. ❤️ 😊

The threads when people mention allergies, coeliac etc get me. The privilege of those who can eat anything (especially teachers who reckon their need to feel good about spending their own money on sweets for kids trumps excluding the same couple of kids time after time).

Oh yes, that too. Should be "unbelievable" but it's not.

Some examples were:”I just don’t drink, I’d rather have a cup of tea. If you want to stop just stop”

same on weight loss threads. People who have been struggling with their weight for decades, tried all methods available, repeatedly - and someone shows up to post 'eat less, move more, it's really simple!'

Oh yy to this. It's all about prioritising your health - conveniently ignoring the fact that not everyone has the time or money to join a gym, or a neighbourhood they can run around safely, or easy access to the countryside to go walking. A couple of YouTube videos a week squeezed in between gull time jobs with long commutes, or caring responsibilities or whatever, just isn't going to cut it - but on MN, it's very common to be in your 70s and still running 10k's. BS.

They're also assuming that hardly anyone is in a job which involves manual labour that buggers your joints.

My dad survived WW2 and working all his remaining life as a coalminer. Mucked up joints and lungs full of coal dust meant that he did well to keep walking for so long.

I find this sort of thing mind boggling. I don't live in the UK and have never met anyone wealthy who thinks that their life is the norm and can't understand that other people don't have the resources they do. It's astonishing that people can live in such a privileged bubble.

Mind you, my old school had a reunion for our 65th, followed by a WatsApp group on which we posted photos from our school days.

One of the boys made a few incredulous comments about the fact that the girls doing their DoE bronze award walk (mainly on the flat) were wearing their school shoes and jeans with a blouse and tank top.

He's a nice lad, but didn't realise that for many of us from working class families in the '70s, that was all we had.

(Schools in our area now loan out boots for the DoE.)

A 'real life' one.
Years ago when l'd had major surgery, was on benefits, and at one stage didn't even have enough to buy a loaf of bread, l asked for help from a debt charity.
Not for money, just for help and advice.
Two ladies came to the house. One was lovely, very kind and supportive.
The other one.... some of her suggestions were:
"Move somewhere cheaper" (I'm in a rented house). Missing the point that l'd need a deposit for a new place (l wouldn't get mine back for this house until l vacated it) and l'd need someone to move my belongings. Who would need paying to do that.
"Just hand your car back". I'd had it a couple of years, l was working when l got it, and l still had two years (and a final payment) to pay back.
"Well keep it and tell them you'll pay £1 a month towards it until you're straight."
It was so ludicrous it was a joke. And this was meant to be someone helping people to sort out their debt problems at a point when they're so desperate they can't sleep and can't think straight, they're ill and it's worse because they're so stressed.
I sacked them off and said l'd sort it myself. Which l did. It took time and hard work (I went back to work when l was well, and had help from some very good friends, who l paid back eventually) but it was just so ridiculous I'd have thought l'd imagined it. But l had all the notes she gave me detailing what she'd said.