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Things you have done to make your life better/calmer

428 replies

PersephoneParlormaid · 09/01/2026 06:55

Ive just been reading a post where someone is talking about doing things, or stopping things, to make life easier and calmer, so I thought I’d ask what you have done to hopefully help and inspire others.
For me the loft being jammed packed was really weighing on my mind and causing low level stress for years. So a couple of years ago, in the spring when it’s cooler/warmer, I committed to cleaning it out. It was hard work but I was ruthless, and all that’s up there now is the kids toys and Xmas decorations. I can’t tell you how much happier it’s made me feel getting it done. I think it was reading about Swedish death cleaning that inspired me.
Another thing I do is regularly unsubscribe to emails, especially after Xmas. I couldn’t see the things I needed to see for all the crap in there.
Then I stopped sending Xmas cards. It surprising how many less you get when you don’t send them, so I assume those people didn’t want to send them to me eitner.
And I gave up drinking. It was affecting my sleep and making me so tired the day after. I honestly don’t miss it.
Finally, I say no. If I’m asked to do something I often say no straightaway and then think about it. If I decide to then do it that’s fine. Having a clear calendar with empty days to do nothing is bliss in my book.

OP posts:
Horses7 · 10/01/2026 10:46

Great thread!

Lastgig · 10/01/2026 10:46

Horses7 · 10/01/2026 10:46

Great thread!

Its peace within it's self isnt it?

Maddy70 · 10/01/2026 10:53

Moved near the sea
Left a stressful job

Being skint is not the same stress as being in my former workplace

AncientMarina · 10/01/2026 10:55

TV (new and old) to slow you down -
Detectorists
Jam and Jerusalem
Catweazle (from the 1970s)
Gardeners World
The Good Life
Canal Boat Diaries
The original All Creatures Great and Small
Winter Walks
Morse
Jules and Greg's Wild Swimming

Screamingabdabz · 10/01/2026 10:55

“We don’t mind what time the kids go to bed but past 7:30 the expectation is that they are calm and quiet occupying themselves so we all have down time.”

This is brilliant advice and was a game changer for us as our children got older. If your kids are sensible then letting them decide their own bed time improves their maturity and independence. Being calm and quiet after a certain time is key so adults can switch off and have an evening. Ours knew we expected them up and ready for the early school bus and they never let us down.

Addictedtohotbaths · 10/01/2026 10:55

HoseGoblin · 09/01/2026 08:05

Quit my job. Then quit again. Then quit again. Cast off the weird loyalty-to-the-point-of-martyrdom mindset I'd had drummed into me growing up and kept moving on until I found something where I can honestly say I absolutely love my job.

Deleted all my social media bar those where I can be more or less anonymous and invisible, so basically Mumsnet and a Reddit account I use mostly to talk about crochet.

Honestly. Having a job I love and no digital Jones's to keep up with has given me more peace than I can say.

I’m about to do this, it’s really scary and I’m so tied to it but I absolutely hate it.

SparrowFeet · 10/01/2026 10:56

Great thread
Mine are - not reading or watching much news - I used to keep up and read avidly but I then had a word with myself and thought about what it was adding to my life. If I wasn't going to properly engage - ie go on marches, write to my MP, volunteer to help then all I was doing was keeping up to date just to know- and I was struggling to understand what power or insight that knowledge was giving me other than just making me feel sad or frustrated.
Giving up alcohol - calm and contentment abound.
Meal planning
Decluttering for five - ten minutes every day - a fly lady recommendation. There's always something to declutter - whether it's just chucking stuff out of the fridge or sorting out what is on the coat rack - doesn't mean throwing things out it just means choosing something to sort.

threescoops · 10/01/2026 10:57

AInightingale · 10/01/2026 10:43

Watched an old Juliet Bravo on there recently and really enjoyed it. Also like Foyle's War.

Ooh! New ones to find, thanks. The Brothers was the best!

heartsinvisiblefury · 10/01/2026 10:58

Limit the news
Think very hard about what I think I want to buy and put them back if they are just filling a void
Say no to things that don’t being me joy
Know my worth

heartsinvisiblefury · 10/01/2026 11:00

Declutterring - it’s amazing how little we actually need - and deleting spam/marketing emails and u subscribing from relentless sell sell sell

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 10/01/2026 11:04

The organised mum Christmas plan worked wonders for me in 2025. At the end of 2024 I put my Xmas decorations into 2 boxes - one for the house, one for the tree. She's really taught me that little and often makes a difference. That's quite hard for my all or nothing adhd brain to accept but it does help.

I've given notice on one of my volunteer positions.

neverwakeasleepingbaby · 10/01/2026 11:09

pollythecat · 09/01/2026 08:06

Haven’t done it yet but considering putting my pre schooler into preschool for an extra day purely so I can get a day to myself to catch up on jobs without having a small child under my feet! I could go to the gym maybe, get my nails done, catch up on housework, the possibilities are endless. However I can’t shake off the guilt and keep telling myself I should enjoy this time with her as she starts school next year.

I did this a few months ago and (I don’t say this lightly) I think it saved me from a mental breakdown. Not having any time to do even “non-fun but essential” tasks was driving me crazy! It means I’m so much more relaxed through the week because I know I have that day to do whatever admin needs doing without having to strategise how he’s going to get done with a two year old in tow. And I do fit in “me” things too like getting my nails done etc. on that day.
So yes, do it!

Bellyblueboy · 10/01/2026 11:10

The best thing I did was clear out my wardrobe. It was jam packed with clothes that don’t fit me and are about ten years out of style!

I now have a reset Sunday. I clean the house and have five days of clothes hanging up in the wardrobe. I work from the office most days and having clothes ready to go makes a huge difference to my mornings - and weirdly I sleep better! Such a small thing

Ferrfoxache · 10/01/2026 11:11

Went NC with my toxic Mother, Came off instagram, Deleted Daily Mail App from my phone. Stopped over explaining myself to folk who don't deserve reasons or explanations. Learned to say 'No' without elaborating. Enjoy my own company more. Stopped giving energy to folk who drag me down mentally and now focus on the folk who genuinely make my day a better one.

GiddyDog · 10/01/2026 11:19

Deleted Facebook/Insta.
Joined the gym and committed to taking time for myself to go.

smallglassbottle · 10/01/2026 11:19

I watch older stuff on YouTube as it's better quality and more calming.

I don't have much contact with people now as I'm audhd and interacting with people stresses me out. I'm retired now, so it's easier to achieve this.

Enchanted82 · 10/01/2026 11:20

Love this thread!
I have worked on many things to help simplify/create more calm in a very chaotic household!
-food shop deliveries- never having to spend time travelling to supermarket and shopping has saved hours every month!
-always have one day on the weekend there are no planned activities/seeing people so we can relax as a family
-cut down number of extra curricular clubs for DC
-eat dinner earlier ( normally by 6pm) so can clean kitchen and wind down for the evening
-reduced spending on ‘stuff’ for the house I really don’t need. Only buying ne essay items
-reduce amount of time doom scrolling and setting an example for children
-have no clutter in the house- infinitely easier to clean!

bumchic · 10/01/2026 11:26

I’ve just ordered a year’s supply of deodorant, toothpaste, toothbrushes, birthday cards, loo roll, kitchen roll, shampoo, conditioner, hand soap and shower gel.

I’ve restocked both cars with kids snacks, wet wipes, spare outfit for each child, sick bags.

Put new lip balm, hand cream and perfume into my most used handbags.

Thrown away stuff I don’t use from bathroom cabinet, cleaning cupboard under sink, medicine box and make up bag.

Been ruthless with clothes - if I didn’t wear it in 2025 it’s going to the charity shop on Monday. (Have abandoned delusions I will get around to listing on Vinted)

ArticWillow · 10/01/2026 11:35

Another great thing I have done was dropping my working hours to 30 instead of 37.5. My job needs to be done every day but is flexible so I am doing 8-2 +/- 30 minutes. No more taking AL for appointments, broken appliances or school stuff for DC. I use my afternoons for house work and regular hobbies keeping the weekend free for family time, day trips and attending sports events.

Again, it's amazing how little you need if everything is minimalist. The only thing that is a huge downside of dropping hours is a vastly reduced holiday/ fun budget. For some things we do have to think twice or wait a bit longer. I know we are lucky to have this as our only financial problem, especially in the current climate.

TheToteBagLady · 10/01/2026 11:36

Planted lots of spring bulbs in autumn

Currantsinthecake · 10/01/2026 11:52

Forty85 · 10/01/2026 07:08

The absolutely most transformative has been deleting messenger app. My younger, alcoholic sister would message me on it all day every day constantly moaning and requiring support. Ive tried to help her for 20 years and nothing has gotten better and it was causing me so much stress especially when I was in the office getting a barrage of messages. She doesn't seem to message much when it needs to be text or WhatsApp and I feel like a huge dark clouds been lifted from over me.

Stopped drinking, I didn't drink much maybe once a month but the hangovers and the anxiety it gave me for days after wasn't worth it.

Deleted Facebook and instagram apps, reading my kindle more instead.

Got really good quality new bedding and pillows and a duvet, sleep is so much better now.

Only have sets of really nice matching pyjamas now, for some reason getting them on and getting into such a comfy bed to read my kindle before sleep just makes me feel calmer.

My next aim is to join up to reformer pilates but I just need to get the confidence to go that first time.

I went to reformer Pilates for the first time a few weeks ago. I was so nervous but it was fine! Loved it!

Elle771 · 10/01/2026 12:03

This is my kind of thread!

  • dont listen to or watch news/real life crime/reality tv (apart from the Traitors lol)
  • meal plan and only cook every other day
  • eat tea before 530pm so a) not going to bed full and b) everything's cleaned up and sorted before DC bedtime at 645pm
  • read in bed in eve instead of watching tv (and the accompanying snacks!)
  • regular sort outs of skincare/toilettries/clothes etc
  • having a cleaner once a fortnight for 90mins means I never have to clean a bathroom and rarely need to hoover/dust/anything more than the daily top ups
  • having 3 sets of bedding means there isn't the time pressure to get a set washed ans dried before needs changing
Elle771 · 10/01/2026 12:03

Oh and no social media thats been game changer

Dragonscaledaisy · 10/01/2026 12:12

Working part time and staying off social media

Dontasksillyquestions · 10/01/2026 12:29

Hired a cleaner. It’s freed up our weekends to spend more time with the kids. And more importantly, I don’t seethe because of DH’s superficial cleaning and he doesn’t feel like I’m ‘nagging’ him to clean. Life changing.