Adam Ramsay Peaty

[Mrsnothingthanks]

And why not? Why is it still seen as so "out there" that a man should double-barrel upon marriage? Nobody would pass one comment if his wife had changed her name to Holly Peaty.
My husband and I both db'd upon marriage. Titles remain unchanged.
It's 2025 ffs!! Stop with the misogyny!

So it's the same for men and women.

In that case, we need to stop telling women that their names are actually their fathers names and not their own because no one does that with men.

How is a man taking a woman’s name and adding it to his a big fuck you to his family but yet women are expected to get rid of their own surname fully on marriage (by some posters on here).

People dislike double barreled because it's a bit common rather than misogyny I think.

Both me and DH double-barrelled our surnames after marriage.

She has two names which followed the patrilineal system to get to her and Adam through their fathers.

But this does not mean that Ramsay is only Gordon’s name and not Holly’s and by naming her child Ramsay she’s giving it her ‘father’s name’. She’s giving it her name.

Our children have both of our names too which are double barrelled.

We just kept our last names as is though.

We can probably all agree that dc in the future will have a smorgasbord of names from mum and dad. So many to choose from and so many stupid arguments. It will end up with everyone using one name - just for simplicity. After all - what’s in a name?

@OhDear111 As long as it's just not her husband's I'll be happy 😀

I never changed my surname when I got married. Double barrelled names are awful. Computer systems never get them right.
I cant understand why you would change your surname when married. It smacks of being "owned" by a man. my Dzs took my name too. Im 64 and think taking a man's name is horribly old fashioned.

And that name will be the man’s because ‘it’s tradition’.

Agree. I find it strange in this day and age that a woman would change her name to her husbands....it smacks of belonging to their husbands...yuk! Men rarely take their wife's name.

You’re really just arguing on feelz now. Your name feels like your “own”. Great.

Doesn’t mean it’s not patrilineal.

If you want to strike out as a feminist - invent a new surname, change it by deed poll, & pass it to your children. It will then be wholly yours and passed down matrilineally.

@Gettingbysomehow Absolute tosh re computer systems and db names - we have never had one issue!!

@Aluna You genuinely believe no woman ever owns her own last name?!!!!

She has added his name...it's just that no fuss is being made about that. But for some reason because he's added his wife's name thats causing comment !

You seem confused. People aren't disputing that our naming system is mostly patrilineal. The disagreement is over your initial contention that women don't get their own surnames but men who received theirs in the same way do. Naturally, you've entirely failed to explain why that would be.

Of course they “do that” with men too. My DH’s name is his father’s. The only difference is that traditionally men pass their father’s name to their wives.

It doesn’t feel like my own. It legally is my own. Our names get to us and then they are our own.

Out of curiosity, what is your opinion of a woman changing her name on marriage? Do you think they might as well because they’ve only got their father’s (not their own) name anyway?

@Snowyowl99 I think it's because men still rarely do. Had my husband not been willing to add my name on to his, I would not have added his name onto mine. And no way was our daughter just taking his name!!!

This is what we’ve done. At one point when pregnant we toyed with just giving the bany my surname. DH was up for it but wow the kickback he got from some of his family members was unreal, I remember a random cousin ringing him to say in no way should he let the baby have my surname (and it is my surname, not just my dad’s!)

I’m not saying double barrelling is totally new but both partners taking a doubled/meshed name is rising among younger people. “surname, a growing number are opting for double-barrelled surnames to preserve their own identity”

www.ukdeedpolloffice.org/name-change-statistics-after-marriage-in-the-uk/

Yes, and if a wife doesn’t take her husband’s name and gives a child her own name, then how is that not defying the patrilineal system? It is her name.

Recent weddings of about half a dozen colleagues in their 20s and 30s: the men have all double barrelled or just taken her name and the women, depressingly, have taken his name without double barrelling.

No they don't.

This thread is a good example. Someone correcting a woman when she refers to her last name as her own wouldn't happen to a man because it is seen as his name.

It happens on other threads in relation to keeping or changing names upon marriage too. Women are told that they already have a mans name but the men? It is always their name, not their fathers name.

This is heartening to see. I always feel slightly depressed when I see women rushing to social media immediately after their wedding to erase their own name.