Page 6 | In tears with disappointment

forgotaboutmyteeth · 2025-12-15T21:57:35+00:00

My daughter had her baby two days ago We planned to drive up to see her tomorrow. A 4-5 hour journey so I'd booked a B&B. The car needed its MOT today, so we boked at the usual garage, emphasising that it must be finished tonight. At 4:30 he phoned to say he'd been delayed but would be finished by 5:30. At 6:30 DH went to find out what was going on, and the place was locked up. DH phoned ,and the owner said he'd popped home and would be back and finished by 8pm. Now, at 9:50 DH is back there. We aren't going, are we? We have other commitments on Thursday Friday and Saturday, so it had to be tomorrow and the next day. I want to meet my grandchild, and hear how the delivery went.

LucyLoo1972 · 16/12/2025 16:25

NessShaness · 15/12/2025 22:38

Really?

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im interested in this response genuinely becasue nothing even ten times worse than this ever impacted me. but then at 44 I had a psychotic break form stress and thee doctors think I may have been in a dissociative state because so many thigns people would usually be upset with and try to resolve I didnt do and then my whole psyche came crashing down,

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 16/12/2025 16:46

Grammarnut · 16/12/2025 11:26

Hire a car or go by train.
Congrats on new DGC. Enjoy the trip however you get there.

Edited

RTFT

Netcurtainnelly · 16/12/2025 16:54

LaurieFairyCake · 16/12/2025 08:11

Have a wonderful time, a new baby is such a blessing at Christmas

Isnt it any other time then lol.

AlertOpalCrab · 16/12/2025 17:01

rhyshoffman650 · 16/12/2025 14:21

Garages really are insufferable ! I hate the way most of them conduct business. They will say things like "bring the car in at 8am" but what that usually means is, we won't be working on it until we get around to it later on in the day or week. They never specify timeframes and the onus is usually on the customer to ring back - unless they want you to pay and then they ring. I brought this up (on a car mechanic sub-reddit) and the responses I had were "i'm not a receptionist/administrator" or something equally ridiculous. I feel your pain.... I don't trust garages to be finished on the day. I usually just assumed that when I drop my car in, i'll get it back when I get it back. It's the only way to stop myself getting angry !

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Agree that OP’s situation where the place was just locked up is terrible service and no you shouldn’t have to ring up to find out when a job will be done. But a lot of people don’t seem to realise that if any parts are needed (in OP’s case a fuel pump) these need to be called in from a supplier, which can easily add a few hours to a job. For some German car brands where parts are very expensive, many UK part suppliers don’t even keep parts in stock and they would need to be ordered from the manufacturer.

Have the most wonderful time meeting your new grandchild OP!!

katepilar · 16/12/2025 17:12

suburberphobe · 15/12/2025 22:42

we live in the middle of nowhere

Sorry you are going through this stress OP at this so busy time before Christmas.

Your quote above, I could never live like that.... I need people and food shopping around me, friendships, community, chatting to a stranger at the bus stop, or on a terrace cafe. etc.

Single mum, adult kid. So there was years of creche, primary, secondary and uni to deal with.....

But we're lucky to live on the Continent with a brilliantly efficient public transport system.....

Whats the point of your post? Saying you couldnt live the way/where OP does. Totally irrelevant here.

Barrenfieldoffucks · 16/12/2025 18:19

forgotaboutmyteeth · 15/12/2025 22:34

So would I, but DH probably feels more strongly about his grandchildren. I've spent all day prepping food for that, so we would be free to do both.

Surely this new baby is his grandchild too?

Blablibladirladada · 16/12/2025 18:24

I hope you had your blast!

👶

Miyagi99 · 16/12/2025 18:24

forgotaboutmyteeth · 15/12/2025 22:11

I've looked at train, but as we live in the middle of nowhere it would be a £50 taxi each way to the station, plus £170 train. And couldn't take all the gifts, though that is less important.

Car hire hadn't occurred to me, but it would have to be delivered. I will look

Unusual that you have a taxi service but no public transport, I live in the sticks and there is no taxi service but there is a bus service (albeit a 45 min walk away). I don’t drive so I would have sent the gifts and followed. But you do have to buy your train tickets in advance. I regularly travel over 300 miles in the UK by train and it’s never over £100 if booked ahead.

Autumngirl5 · 16/12/2025 18:51

So glad it is all sorted OP. Such a special time meeting your grandchild for the first time. Have a lovely time.

FlyingCatGirl · 16/12/2025 19:01

Namechange2567 · 16/12/2025 03:58

Congratulations, OP! Glad you’re sorted. I’d be cautious with what others have said about staying longer unless DD has suggested it. My in laws met baby at 12 days old and were so intense it has ruined our relationship. They’ve seen him once since and won’t again until he’s 9 months simply because I don’t want them around as they insisted on him being passed around, kissing him etc. I wanted my mam to meet DS but she understood it was for 5 minutes only and then I wanted her to leave. I’d be really careful about respecting your DDs wishes as you sound very excited

You have ruined the relationship by treating your babies grandparents like they are utter shit! You don't have to be so cruel and nasty as to ban them completely from the child's life for the first 9 months! That's barbaric! Did you ever stop to think what that 9 months feels like for the grandparents you are banning from seeing their grandchild! Who does that! It's not normal! Are you telling me that you and your partner have kept yourselves in the house and have never socialised since the baby was born? You need to build bridges before you become a thorn in the side of the relationship between the child and grandparents. I know what's it like to have a mum that causes problems between family relationships and you don't tend to forget or forgive that.

KilkennyCats · 16/12/2025 19:11

FlyingCatGirl · 16/12/2025 19:01

You have ruined the relationship by treating your babies grandparents like they are utter shit! You don't have to be so cruel and nasty as to ban them completely from the child's life for the first 9 months! That's barbaric! Did you ever stop to think what that 9 months feels like for the grandparents you are banning from seeing their grandchild! Who does that! It's not normal! Are you telling me that you and your partner have kept yourselves in the house and have never socialised since the baby was born? You need to build bridges before you become a thorn in the side of the relationship between the child and grandparents. I know what's it like to have a mum that causes problems between family relationships and you don't tend to forget or forgive that.

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This 100%

PhilOPastry62 · 16/12/2025 19:44

Can't believe some of the replies on here. OP, I'm so glad it worked out in the end. Drive safely, and have a lovely time with your new grandchild.

ThreeMenInAVan · 16/12/2025 19:57

MumbleBumbleAppleCrumble · 16/12/2025 15:11

My suggestion to the original question was completely reasonable and wasn’t rude or offensive.
So your problem is either that:

the issue had been resolved already (fine, but hardly requiring you to respond to me, and certainly not with such a sarcastic response);
that other people had already suggested it (if you have an issue with repetition on MN threads might I suggest MN isn’t the best place for you, and as before, my suggestion was hardly needing any response let alone your sarcasm);
the OP had raised concerns around cost (again, my suggestion was still reasonable and cost concerns should presumably be weighed against the desire to go…)

But really, why you feel the need to monitor a thread like this and rudely attack people for giving reasonable and inoffensive suggestions is bizarre. I might suggest there are more fulfilling things you might find to do with your life.

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Ah, ok. My first reply to you was meant to be a semi humorous one in keeping with your comment, because I find it odd when people post on a thread that’s several pages long as though their reasonable, yet obvious, suggestion hasn’t already been made. I didn’t mean it to be a rude attack on you but you clearly took it that way, so I’m sorry about that.

Lettucealone · 16/12/2025 20:45

FlyingCatGirl · 16/12/2025 19:01

You have ruined the relationship by treating your babies grandparents like they are utter shit! You don't have to be so cruel and nasty as to ban them completely from the child's life for the first 9 months! That's barbaric! Did you ever stop to think what that 9 months feels like for the grandparents you are banning from seeing their grandchild! Who does that! It's not normal! Are you telling me that you and your partner have kept yourselves in the house and have never socialised since the baby was born? You need to build bridges before you become a thorn in the side of the relationship between the child and grandparents. I know what's it like to have a mum that causes problems between family relationships and you don't tend to forget or forgive that.

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Lol. Nope. That only works if she gives a fuck if the overbearing grandparents are in the picture. Kids do not care, and mum is free of their interference until she chooses to allow them to visit again, so it all worked out well by the sounds :)

So yeah, OP, weeping because you have a problem getting to meet the baby is over the top. Don't behave like a loony around the baby, you will cause trouble for yourself.

takealettermsjones · 16/12/2025 20:55

Hooray it's a Christmas miracle! Enjoy OP and don't forget your frankincense and myrrh!! ❤️🤣

FlyingCatGirl · 16/12/2025 21:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim · 16/12/2025 21:12

Namechangerage · 16/12/2025 00:24

Yes.

OP, I assume your DH isn’t biological grandfather to the new baby in your life, and you aren’t biological grandmother to his grandchildren? I know you’ve sorted it now, but it’s concerning you would have prioritised your DH seeing his grandchildren who he has met before over meeting your grandchild for the first time and supporting your DD?! Don’t you want to stay there longer than one night?

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This

Lettucealone · 16/12/2025 21:14

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Namechangerage · 16/12/2025 22:12

Hi OP, I hope you met your wonderful grandchild and hugged your DD.

I also hope you find some strength to stand up for what you want to do and not just be swept up in your partner’s family all the time. I was a bit concerned about how easily you were willing to give up on seeing your DD because your partner would “prefer” to see his family.

Blogswife · 16/12/2025 22:51

Namechange2567 · 16/12/2025 03:58

Congratulations, OP! Glad you’re sorted. I’d be cautious with what others have said about staying longer unless DD has suggested it. My in laws met baby at 12 days old and were so intense it has ruined our relationship. They’ve seen him once since and won’t again until he’s 9 months simply because I don’t want them around as they insisted on him being passed around, kissing him etc. I wanted my mam to meet DS but she understood it was for 5 minutes only and then I wanted her to leave. I’d be really careful about respecting your DDs wishes as you sound very excited

You really only allowed your own DM to see her new grandchild for 5 minutes ? She must have been heartbroken . I understand the need for privacy but that’s just cruel

NET145 · 16/12/2025 23:07

Taxis and public transport

NoCommentingFromNowOn · 16/12/2025 23:09

So even a thread about a car panic and a lovely newborn baby attracts venomous replies and squabbling.

Mumsnet have deleted some posts here, but there’s still plenty of unpleasantness left.

One more nail in the coffin for a ‘supportive’ forum.

Isinglass20 · 17/12/2025 08:36

Surely a neighbour could’ve given you a lift to and from the station?

Original poster

forgotaboutmyteeth · 19/12/2025 16:12

Isn't amazing how much people can find to fight about?

But not half as amazing as my gorgeous new grand baby. Brand new tiny people are great big miracles. This particular miracle has lots of dark hair, the darkest blue eyes and long skinny feet. Worth every anxious moment for mummy, daddy and me, and so far being very easy indeed, barring one glorious poo that literally spread from nose to toes.

The journey was easy in the end, probably more comfortable in the borrowed car than it would have been in ours. Yes, it was insured. I still think the garage behaved extremely badly, mainly by failing to communicate, but after DH carefully explained the situation they came through. He thinks we got caught in the middle of a post divorce childcare battle.

There is no question of me being under pressure from DH to prioritise his family. We hd a plan that worked for everyone, it was only the car issue that threatened that. I'm rather fond of his children and grandchildren. His son set us up together, so I do owe then quite a lot.

So now all manner of things shall be well. My daughter asked to have a quiet Christmas at home, being a family, but I will be back to see them very soon. On the train, prebooked.

OP posts:

supersop60 · 19/12/2025 21:53

Congratulations!