What does this school mum actually think the rest of us are queuing for??

[aperolspritzbasicbitch]

In general I arrive at my child’s school for pick up about 5 minutes before the playground gate is opened. Not on purpose, it just happens that sometimes the walk is quicker than others. Sometimes I’m the first one there, sometimes there are a few people in front, and others join the queue behind me.

One particular mum will turn up bang on collection time (fine) and just walk past the queue of people patiently waiting and stand right in front of the gate.
As if we aren’t all there for the same reason.

It actually baffles me that she seems to think that her need to collect her child is any greater than the rest of us, but so far haven’t said anything because I can’t be arsed with any playground drama, although yesterday I was tempted to side step in front of her just as the gate was open.

is this not just straight up rude behaviour?

The only way to know for sure whether she is desperate to be first or just thinks it is not a real queue is to stand with your nose touching the gate and see if she tries to push you out of the way.

Please do that and come back and update us 😁

And we have established that where you are in this milling about area masquerading as a queue makes no difference to when your child is actually released into your care. So it makes no odds to your working hours if she's closer to the gate and onto the playground ahead of you or not.

She's obviously vair vair important and her time is more important than anyone else's!

We used to have the odd school parent that did the same… it stopped irritating me when I realised the gates open for everybody at the same time and the class come out as a whole so it doesn’t matter who gets through the gate first as I could be the first one in and end up waiting ages for my child or last one in and first one to have my child come out 😅

I agree it's rude OP.

It does seem like an unnecessary queue, but even so most wouldn't just disregard it like this.

Next time you're first, lean with your back up against the gate, then it won't look like you're standing too weirdly close, but she also can't get past you.

Except, it is a queue.
I didn’t suggest that it made any odds to my working hours, in fact I was saying that regardless of the example the other poster gave, I am capable of being polite and not cutting in.

It's weird to queue in a line to go through a gate that empties into a large space where people then spread out, especially when being first in the queue has no advantage.

At my child's school parents just stand around on the pavement outside the gate if friendship groups chatting and meander on through when the gate is opened.

Lots of posters agree it isn't a queue. You can't cut into something that doesn't actually move you forward in a process. Moving slightly earlier from one waiting area to another waiting area isn't cutting in. The "queue" as you insist on considering it serves no purpose.

I understand what you mean because I bet its similar to our school set up. We queue to get in the gate, then queue infront of each class door. So if someone jumped in the front of the first queue they would then be first in the classroom queue, which in my polite mind would equal, pushing infront of others who have waited longer outside in the main queue.

Its like saying its okay to push to the front of the bus queue because the bus is taking you all the same way. To walk past everyone to the front of the obvious queue is ignorant.

It has the semblance of a queue, but it's a clueless queue. There is no reason to be queueing in this situation. Randomly waiting outside the gate will do.

It does seem like an unnecessary queue, but even so most wouldn't just disregard it like this.

This sentence is hilarious!

Never disregard a queue. Obey all queues - regardless of whether they have a purpose or not.

The bus analogy doesn't work though because if you're first in the queue you get first dibs of whatever seats are available. And/or if the weather is foul, you get to be warm and dry quicker.

OP's queue is utterly pointless.

I sometimes jump the queue at the school gates. It’s very unlike me and I would normally never do it, but it’s the most inefficient queue that I have ever seen in my life. No one seems to want to stand near to the gate or near to each other so you have end up with five people standing where you could fit twenty. And then when more people arrive they hold back and end up queuing out onto the street and it makes it difficult to get children in and out with prams, scooters, etc.

At first I dutifully queued every day and then finally decided against the madness.

Ok, and lots of people agree that it is a queue - namely all of the other parents who can see the set up and queue too, rather than everyone just forming a scrum outside of a single person gate.

she’s the only parent who does this, so I’ve not made up a queue system in my head.

It makes a no difference to me because it’s only waiting for the gate to open. The first people through the gate will be waiting longer in the playground, until the children are let out. There’s no advantage in being through the gate quicker than anyone else.

Perhaps it is a challenge for the teaching staff. Thou shalt release the children in the order their parents/carers are lined up outside the gate.

It doesn’t sound like a queue to me and the woman ignoring the queue isn’t benefitting from doing that, so I’d just let it go. Who cares where she stands?

It's just manners, as I see it 🤔

If I approached a shop door where people were waiting outside for it to open, I wouldn't just walk past everyone waiting and straight through the door when it opened?! Even though it makes no difference because once inside we all go our own way anyway. It's just rude.

The queue jumper might just be socially anxious. I’ve almost been that person myself. When I was dropping off my niece at school, I arrived early and didn’t realise the gates opened at a set time.

A crowd had started to gather in front, and I assumed it was just a cluster of parents chatting. Thankfully, as I got closer, I worked up the nerve to ask if it was a queue.

School gates are intimidating when you’re not a regular. One mum looked at me like I’d just broken some unspoken code, smirking as she nodded. If I hadn’t asked, I’d have been the accidental queue jumper.

This doesn’t really fit if it’s a regular queue jumper though. This one sounds entitled and like she’s acting above her station.

Mmmm, it is a queue, but not one where the reward at the end of it is affected by someone pushing in so this wouldnt particularly bother me.

Depending on how arsey I feel at the time if I was first I might turn round and lean back nonchalantly against the gate stopping her from pushing in. But thats just if Ive already had a day of people being knobs around me and I wanted to take a bit of power back 🤣

It does make a difference in a shop. There might be limited numbers of the item you want or a special offer. Nobody is giving away discounted children to the first 10 parents on the playground.

If she’s always just on time then she might not realise

The gathering at the gate was described as a queue. I know the definition of queue.

I agree. My DCs school was very obviously a queue. Unless you were thick as two short planks! I'm so glad my school run days are over

As her actions make no difference to how quickly you can collect your child and leave, why are you worrying about it? Maybe she's oblivious, maybe she's doing it deliberately, but it seems it doesn't really impact you.