What does this school mum actually think the rest of us are queuing for??

[aperolspritzbasicbitch]

In general I arrive at my child’s school for pick up about 5 minutes before the playground gate is opened. Not on purpose, it just happens that sometimes the walk is quicker than others. Sometimes I’m the first one there, sometimes there are a few people in front, and others join the queue behind me.

One particular mum will turn up bang on collection time (fine) and just walk past the queue of people patiently waiting and stand right in front of the gate.
As if we aren’t all there for the same reason.

It actually baffles me that she seems to think that her need to collect her child is any greater than the rest of us, but so far haven’t said anything because I can’t be arsed with any playground drama, although yesterday I was tempted to side step in front of her just as the gate was open.

is this not just straight up rude behaviour?

And you can bet if it was an actual queue like at a shop then the first person in that queue would be actually at the entrance. Not hanging back vaguely near it. If you don't want to stand actually at the gate, which you can't be if there's room for her to get nearer then you can't complain that your non-queue queue isn't being treated like a queue.

And as it makes no difference at all to who gets their child first why does it matter?

Do of the "queue" is to the left of the gate you would expect someone arriving from the right to walk the whole length of the "queue", even if they gain nothing and you don't fmgain anything?

No, I wouldn’t be standing with my nose to a shop door either. And I’m not standing vaguely near it - just not so close that my breath would fog up the metal of the gate.
a queue in to a shop would have no bearing on how fast i would get my shop done, but i still wouldn’t walk past a line of people who has been waiting to be let in.

People bypass the queue all the time at our school. I think the people who queue are mainly SAHMs. They walk SLOWLY in big duvet coats. Many allow their 10 month olds to walk at a snails pace so you are stuck behind them thinking you definitely won't make the 9am call unless you literally leapfrog this small child.

There is no left and right of the queue. It’s at the bottom of a road, everyone is approaching from the same direction. You cannot get to the gate without walking past everyone else that is already there.

well, this is pick up and not drop off, so there’s no 9 am call to worry about.

What does the queue achieve though if kids come out randomly? It doesn't seem to have a purpose.

Why do you need to queue? You're not all collecting the same child from the same classroom are you? You're just waiting for the gate to open. Does the order you go through it matter?

I agree with @DappledThings. A similar thing happens here in that zillions of people wait for the gate to open in an inefficient single file from said gate right out onto the pavement...then no no-one can get past on the pavement. To keep people safe, you have to walk past the "queue" (it's not really a queue - see multiple posts above) at the bottleneck pavement-adjacent entrance to get to the big fucking space that no-one's using because they think they need to be in the single file line (which is full of massive gaps as everyone's looking at their phones and not closing it up). They don't 😳

At DD's dance school they come out and are handed over to parents who are in a line up the stairs. The children are despatched in the order they are ready, not where the parent is so there is no advantage to being at the top of the stairs. But people leave big gaps, they don't go right to the top where the door is and leave 2-3 steps between so the line has to stretch out round the corner onto the street where parents can't hear their child's name being called.

So yes, every week I go past some muppets who have left inefficient and pointless gaps in what is a line but not a queue. Hanging around the back just contributes to the inefficient use of space.

It's not a queue because you are not proceeding. You are waiting. The order in which you enter the gate makes no difference to the end outcome.

It's a waiting area that you've applied traditional British (I'm assuming, maybe somewhere else) cultural norms to. It's not a right or wrong situation.

Are you HER? 🤔

What a nasty and judgemental post.

So your time is more important? Because you work and the "duvet clad SAHM's" don't, you think it's okay to queue jump?

Some people are just too bloody entitled.

If the queue is single file and causing problems further down, like blocking the pavement for pedestrians (a bit like 2 lanes of traffic, filtering into one, but everyone queues in one lane and it causes a back up, when really everyone should use both lanes and filter in at the end - zip merge) then I can understand why she does it.
If not, I would say she is either a CF or she is oblivious. My mum would do this and not realise for example.

OP, are you leaving a big gap between you and the gate, so you appear to be waiting from a distance, rather than queuing? I think late arrival mum is just being efficient. I wonder why you are judging her…

Nope! Our school the outside the gates non-queue waiting bit comes at two angles to the gate.

There's a sort of loose queue in that if people are there early you can't fit people through the gate more than two abreast but it's people waiting individually or in little groups and if someone wants to go nearer the gate to chat to someone nobody is getting precious about their particular half square metre of pavement at that point when it makes no difference to when their child comes out.

YANBU for being annoyed, she sounds very entitled.

I'd not bother replying to people who don't understand how a queue works @aperolspritzbasicbitch

They are the type of people like this mum, who think they are far more important than the plebs waiting patiently

Oh god, who cares? (Yes, I know the OP does.) it doesn’t sound like it makes any difference to when you gather up your child.

We just stood around in a big heap in the playground. No queueing involved, and the children were released in whatever order the teacher had going on, regardless of when their parent had turned up.

Can't believe a queue for child collection even looks like a queue. Mum x will chat to mum y. Mum w will arrive and see Mum z half way and pop over to let her know the PTA meeting has changed to 5pm from 6. Then theyll move to see Mum b because shes thinking of joining the PTA. That sort of melle.

Mum O arrives late, just sees random bunches of Mums (Dads are probably available too)....and doesnt even think its a queue. In fact, she might have assumed theyll be continuing to chat when schools out and so she can collect little O and be off, fast, as she has maybe she has only got a 15m slot to collect and get home.

Who knows! But if shes not be approached to establish her understanding, dont moan.

I could well be THIS mum! I am really short so move past all the huge gaps towards the front so that the teacher can see me. This doesn’t speed up the time that I receive my child as they are let out when they are each ready. So weird to have these big gaps and then to resent someone moving towards the front.

The queue is for the gate - they're kept locked until school finish time so a queue forms before they're unlocked, usually.

Our school gate is also one at a time width and is a fucking ballache.

I would agree it's a queue. But it is a queue without a purpose so she is doing the right thing.

Ive lived in England for 15 years, i love it. But seriously, queuing is like cat nip to English people. This doesnt even sound like a queue, you just arrived first.

Anyway, she skipped the ficticious queue. Do the same if it bothers you that much.

Get there 5 mins early and cling on to the gate for dear life... until they swing that fucker open then run.

How short are you that when people are queuing to go through a locked gate (that the teachers can’t even see) to get in to the playground you have to walk to the very front of the line? That makes no sense.

this isn’t a case of wasted space. It’s someone walking past a line of people queuing to get through a gate