Page 15 | Have you ever found something belonging to your parents that made you see them in a different light?

Screenager · 2025-10-30T18:37:57+00:00

When I was a teen I found a sex toy in my mum’s drawer. I shouldn’t have been snooping. It made me think of her differently, and I felt a bit weird about it for a bit. I’m over it now, I think 🤔

EleanorReally · 31/10/2025 19:32

actually i did find letters that my df wrote to dm, we were in separate countries by then, and he wrote many letters about my ds going to stay with him

very upsetting even now

CagneyNYPD1 · 31/10/2025 19:34

TheLivelyRose · 30/10/2025 18:48

Yes, I found everything after my mother died.

When I was clearing out her house, I found in her bottom clothes drawer a keepsake box full of things from my sister's life. Little cards, she'd written mum, samples of her school work right from primary up to university. There was nothing for me.

When I cleared out the garage, it was overloaded with boxes of my sister's possessions. There were schoolbooks right from reception age, all the way up to university. Not one single book or exercise book from school have been thrown out of my sisters.

You ve probably already guessed it.I ve found a few items of mine. Maybe an exercise book from when I was eleven in my first year of secondary school, but that was about it.

The garage was an archive of my sister's entire life.And virtually nothing of mine had been kept.

It made me see my mother in a very different light.As obviously I didn't mean that much to her. I was always the mature and sensible one ( although I was the youngest)who was called upon to sort out everybody's problems, which was why I was clearing the house out.Whilst my sister did the square root of fuck all.

Edited

I’m so sorry that you went through this @TheLivelyRose. As I was reading your post, it struck me that it could be me writing the same in the future. I know full well that I will face similar when my mum is no longer with us. And yes, I’m the dependable, younger sibling who gets things done.

McBuckers · 31/10/2025 19:37

When my mum died, I was clearing out her house and found her box of 'keep sakes'. In it was a telegram dated the same year as my mum left my dad. The telegram was from 'uncle' Jim, telling my mum how much he loved her.

I remember going for days out with this man and my mum but never remember him being around as my mum's partner. I now think that my mum had an affair with him and expected Jim to leave his wife - which he never did.

It makes me think about her very differently.

canyouseemyhousefromhere · 31/10/2025 19:47

MouseCheese87 · 30/10/2025 18:50

Everyone has sex toys, they aren't really the eye opener you think they are.

I don’t 🤷‍♀️

CagneyNYPD1 · 31/10/2025 19:47

I just remembered…we discovered that my grandparents were married a year after they said. Which meant that my dad was born 6 months after their wedding, not 18 months.

GreenCandleWax · 31/10/2025 19:51

TheLivelyRose · 30/10/2025 18:48

Yes, I found everything after my mother died.

When I was clearing out her house, I found in her bottom clothes drawer a keepsake box full of things from my sister's life. Little cards, she'd written mum, samples of her school work right from primary up to university. There was nothing for me.

When I cleared out the garage, it was overloaded with boxes of my sister's possessions. There were schoolbooks right from reception age, all the way up to university. Not one single book or exercise book from school have been thrown out of my sisters.

You ve probably already guessed it.I ve found a few items of mine. Maybe an exercise book from when I was eleven in my first year of secondary school, but that was about it.

The garage was an archive of my sister's entire life.And virtually nothing of mine had been kept.

It made me see my mother in a very different light.As obviously I didn't mean that much to her. I was always the mature and sensible one ( although I was the youngest)who was called upon to sort out everybody's problems, which was why I was clearing the house out.Whilst my sister did the square root of fuck all.

Edited

This is absolutely awful, and must have been devastating. i hope you have managed to somehow move on from it and all the ramifications.

neilyoungismyhero · 31/10/2025 19:53

Hellohelga · 30/10/2025 21:51

Charity donation bag? OMG who would want that second hand?

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You'd be flabbergasted at the type of donations we get given in our charity shop.

canyouseemyhousefromhere · 31/10/2025 19:56

My ds told me that she had found a tin with a rubber ‘thingy’ in it when she was very little and was happily playing with it on the hearth rug while aunties, uncles & cousins were visiting one Christmas. Suddenly mum screeched and grabbed her contraceptive cap from ds hands.

Middleagedspreadisreal · 31/10/2025 19:56

MouseCheese87 · 30/10/2025 18:50

Everyone has sex toys, they aren't really the eye opener you think they are.

I don't!

RubyMentor · 31/10/2025 20:00

neilyoungismyhero · 31/10/2025 19:53

You'd be flabbergasted at the type of donations we get given in our charity shop.

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My Grandparents never hid the fact that my Grandmother lied about her age by one year to get married without her guardians permission. She alway told me that her parents died when she was very young. About 4 years ago I started to trace my family tree, 2 years ago I finally found her birth certificate and she was illegitimate, probably quite a scandal in 1911, I’m still trying to find out what happened to my great grandmother, although I’ve traced her siblings and found a marriage and children for one.

LT1233 · 31/10/2025 20:04

My husband found his dad's VHS tape of Butt Mans Wet Dreams when he was helping his parents move house. His mum was mortified.

EstherGreenwood63 · 31/10/2025 20:10

@IAmKerplunk oh God that has made me feel so sad for her. God bless her. And yet, yes the Rodney comment is stone cold hilarious. 💐

LT1233 · 31/10/2025 20:13

My mum found a letter from the early 90's in my grandmas dressing table in a few years ago after she'd died. It was from an intermediary masquerading as a friend with some vague language asking if she knew of a person called X born on X date. There was another letter behind it from my grandma in response (don't know if it was a rough copy or the unsent only copy) asking for no further contact. My grandma was the meekest, mildest, quietest lady ever, so prim and proper, so our assumption she might have had a child aged 15 just 1 month before her own mum gave birth to her sister, was just mind blowing. Anyway, I'm like a dog with a bone for needing to have answers, and long story short, after exploring many avenues, I found my mums half (half proved by a dna test, but surprising as he looks like my grandad!) brother. We've answered lots of questions for him (he's such a lovely man too) but unfortunately we're left with many questions, some of them are quite worrying, ourselves now.

EstherGreenwood63 · 31/10/2025 20:26

@Shartly omg! So much to unpack there. Awful! Poor poor woman.

mumwhoneedshalp · 31/10/2025 20:32

when I was a teenager I found love letters in my mums room between her and my step dad talking about my dad having cancer, they were having an affair whilst he was dying. I always knew this deep down from being around 4/5 and was probably why I was so horrid to my step dad growing up.
I have never told her I know.

Dinosaurhearmeroar · 31/10/2025 20:37

Hons123 · 30/10/2025 22:43

Spot on, it is not compulsory to normalise perversion.

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This is amazing. A sex toy is a perversion? God, my vanilla self with one vibrator feels quite edgy. Is this what it’s like to be kink shamed? 😂

MrsWatson1985 · 31/10/2025 20:41

My mum & dad divorced in 1993 when I was 7. They just said they didn't love each other any more and my dad would be moving out. When I was much older I found out it was because my dad had been shagging his bosses wife behind her back all whilst this poor man was dying of cancer. They thought they'd profit from the money he had (very successful business man) but thankfully he'd changed all his will and left every penny to his only daughter. Made me feel so disgusted in him. The had no idea the man I adored could do something so wicked and cruel. Edited due to horrendous spelling x

Musermum · 31/10/2025 20:52

TheLivelyRose · 30/10/2025 19:16

Seeing is my sister didn't lift a finger to clear the house out. I had the last laugh by taking every last bit of her life archive and chucking it all in the bin. She wouldn't even come and look at what was there.It goes in the bin.I didn't want it.

So my mum kept all of that, and my sister wasn't even that bothered.

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My goodness, you could be describing my family. I had to clear everything, and found baby blanket and newspaper cuttings belonging to sister. She couldn't be bothered collecting them. And I found a card thanking mum for the money for the car. I only got anything towards a car because I had to lift her and look after her during an illness before she died. It's gutting isn't it... But I still would rather be me.

OkimADHD · 31/10/2025 21:12

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 30/10/2025 19:26

I was thinking this. It’s first child syndrome. By the time people get to child number 2 or 3 there’s no photos of them!

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I have loads of printed photos of my 1st child and only a few of my 2nd. Nothing awful, its just that by the time I had my 2nd i was on Facebook and all.memories and pics are put on there. I hope Facebook never seizes or ill have to get hundreds of them printed

Tomatocutwithazigzagedge · 31/10/2025 21:13

Iclyn · 31/10/2025 17:59

Why would it be painful for the man ? It's weightless sex , he is standing / kneeling up and the person in the swing is easily available , and easy to manoeuvre .
Never tried it , but I'd be willing to give it a go !

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I think they both get in the swing, don't they? I remember one episode with Samantha in SATC using one.

NoMoreBrownSofas · 31/10/2025 21:18

Polaroids
That I'm pretty sure were taken by her other man
I found them on boxing day when I was 15

Shartly · 31/10/2025 21:33

EstherGreenwood63 · 31/10/2025 20:26

@Shartly omg! So much to unpack there. Awful! Poor poor woman.

Honestly far too much to unpack!! She died with pretty much nothing as her husband’s son had access to her bank card (misguided trust before she got ill) and they stole her life’s savings. My dad to this day regrets not monitoring her accounts, no one thought someone could be that shitty but there you go 😬 We would all do a lot differently if we could go back in time!!

Lurleenlumpkin79 · 31/10/2025 22:11

TheLivelyRose · 30/10/2025 18:48

Yes, I found everything after my mother died.

When I was clearing out her house, I found in her bottom clothes drawer a keepsake box full of things from my sister's life. Little cards, she'd written mum, samples of her school work right from primary up to university. There was nothing for me.

When I cleared out the garage, it was overloaded with boxes of my sister's possessions. There were schoolbooks right from reception age, all the way up to university. Not one single book or exercise book from school have been thrown out of my sisters.

You ve probably already guessed it.I ve found a few items of mine. Maybe an exercise book from when I was eleven in my first year of secondary school, but that was about it.

The garage was an archive of my sister's entire life.And virtually nothing of mine had been kept.

It made me see my mother in a very different light.As obviously I didn't mean that much to her. I was always the mature and sensible one ( although I was the youngest)who was called upon to sort out everybody's problems, which was why I was clearing the house out.Whilst my sister did the square root of fuck all.

Edited

That is so sad. I'm so sorry. 😞

SuperGinger · 31/10/2025 22:11

When I was a child, I found a photo of my grandmother with a man who wasn't my grandfather, all looking decent, I showed my mum who took the photo outside and burnt it. Nothing more was ever said about it.

In my grandparents house we found some very sweet stories written by my mum when she was a little girl of about six they were about two sets of twins who were best friends.

EstherGreenwood63 · 31/10/2025 22:11

@VoltaireMittyDream Oh how utterly dreadful. Your poor mil and dh. What a monster. 💐