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How often do your 11yr olds have friends to sleepover?

87 replies

Gymmum82 · 04/10/2025 16:48

Interested to hear off others how often your 11 year olds have friends to stay over.

My husband hates having kids over especially to sleepover so I feel like here it’s almost never. Maybe birthdays and that’s about it. I feel bad for my kids as when I was growing up I’d stay over at friends or they at mine basically every weekend.

According to my kids their friends have sleepovers most weekends but I’m not sure if they say that because we rarely do and I’m not sure if they don’t get invited because it’s not reciprocated.
So what’s the norm for you?

OP posts:
TheGrimSmile · 04/10/2025 16:50

My kids are older now but when they were 11 it was every weekend.

Rituelec · 04/10/2025 16:55

Once a month maybe a bit less

purpleme12 · 04/10/2025 16:56

5 times a year at a guess

Even then it's next door or her cousin

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vonHammersmark · 04/10/2025 16:57

TheGrimSmile · 04/10/2025 16:50

My kids are older now but when they were 11 it was every weekend.

Every week!

17yearitch · 04/10/2025 16:58

Maybe 4/5 times a year. Most weekends we're up early to go to sports clubs so sleepovers happen in the holidays

indoorplantqueen · 04/10/2025 17:27

Once every few weeks then and now that dd is 14. My dh would’ve rolled his eyes a bit, but as it became more regular he knew the kids coming were no bother and dd loved it. It’s just what you do as parents.

Teeheehee1579 · 04/10/2025 17:31

Rarely ever - mine aren’t bothered by them (my youngest actively dislikes them). So I would say some are having them every weekend but many are not…. They still see their friends loads - out on bikes for most of the day with mates etc but just not the sleepover bit.

Pennyhillxxx · 04/10/2025 17:33

My children had someone staying every couple of weeks.

somanythingssolittletime · 05/10/2025 15:13

Never, but as a family we are against sleepovers

CandyRuby · 05/10/2025 15:14

Never, don’t agree with them as a family.

coxesorangepippin · 05/10/2025 15:17

Never

I am not interested in parenting other people's kids through the night

Dingdong90 · 05/10/2025 15:19

Every weekend pretty much, My eldest is 15 and she usually has her friend staying at least twice a week, they don't even ask anymore😂 my youngest is 9 and she does usually have a friend over staying probably 2/3 times a month. I usually only say no if I have an early start the following day. I hated not being allowed sleepovers as a kid,so did my partner so we tend to just say yes and let them have fun /make memories. One more kid in the house usually makes it easier I find, they keep each other entertained ,we literally just have to feed them and make sure they go to sleep at some point 😂

FuzzyWolf · 05/10/2025 15:20

Quite often but it’s always the same child and she’s lovely.

AlbionVs · 05/10/2025 15:20

Our house is too small to host. And my daughters friends all have either a father living at home or a brother 10+ so never. Maybe different if you have a boy

mummybear35 · 05/10/2025 15:20

Girls have them more often than boys..my daughter played sports and had training/matches most Saturdays so sleepovers were usually only Sat nights or during holidays. Son was the same. We have a house that’s big enough for the kids to have their own den so if had friends over, they rarely disturbed our space as played games etc in their own den. We didn’t mind, I loved cooking and baking for them, we also preferred to know who the kids were that ours were hanging around with and meet/chat with the parents when they came to pick up..

Roxy9176 · 05/10/2025 15:21

Bit younger but never. We don’t/wont do sleepovers.

Besides safety concerns, it’s not possible to have anyone sleep over here as I have health issues.

Ladyluck22 · 05/10/2025 15:22

Probably once a month my 11 year-old sleeps round one of our friends houses and once a month we’ll have someone over ours to sleep, probably more in the holidays.

Emmz1510 · 05/10/2025 15:24

My daughter is nearly 11 and I’d say at the moment we host a sleepover maybe every 6-8 weeks. She has several friends as well as similar age cousins and probably averages a sleepover over away from home every 2/3 weekends. My OH isn’t keen either. Can’t say I am either really- I find them exhausting and DD is a moody nightmare the next day- but she enjoys them so much and really want her to have a better experience of friendships than I did as a kid. I was painfully shy, lonely and have always struggled making and keeping friends so I want it to be different for her and it makes me so happy to see her having carefree fun with her friends.

Florin · 05/10/2025 15:25

In our school it depends, there is some kids who have a sleep over ever Friday others have none. We do holidays only. He plays rugby and has school matches Saturday and local club matches on Sunday and homework to fit in between there just isn’t room for no sleep and we try and do homework first thing on the weekend days. We aim for holidays and invite a couple of kids over at a time and do a big day out with them like taking them to a premiership match followed by a sleepover. For kids who adore sleepovers they are their favourite activity and it seems mean not to do them. I completely get they aren’t for every child though.

Everybodysinthehousetonight · 05/10/2025 15:25

Never, I never encouraged it. They are 15 and 17 now and perfectly happy teens with excellent social lives. I do get the older teens friends crashing after nights out now and that's no problem.

PurpleParent · 05/10/2025 15:26

About once a month here. I do get annoyed with parents who NEVER reciprocate without good reason - my kids enjoy going to other’s houses as much as they enjoy a friend coming to ours.

cadburyegg · 05/10/2025 15:28

My DS who is nearly 11 has never been to a sleepover and never been interested in having one. It doesn’t seem to be a thing amongst his friends. People tell me it’s more of a girl thing.

Fishingboatbobbingnight · 05/10/2025 15:28

TheGrimSmile · 04/10/2025 16:50

My kids are older now but when they were 11 it was every weekend.

Same here.. and there were 7 kids and their friends.. we loved it !

AgnesMcDoo · 05/10/2025 15:30

Not that often but mine are in scouts and so are away camping a lot so there doesn’t feel the same need for sleepovers.

Blanketpolicy · 05/10/2025 15:34

Just about every weekend at 11. There were 8-9 dc in the group and everyone, if they could, took their turn so we only had to do it every 9 weeks or so.

ds grew out of them by the time he was 13ish.

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