I start a new job as a cleaner today and the thought is really depressing me.

[MybosswasMrMcGee]

Firstly, I am not knocking being a cleaner, it's just not something that I really enjoy doing but I am in a position where I have no choice right now and need the money.

But I just feel so sad about my life.

Twenty years ago today I was in labour with my first born, it was one of the happiest times of my life. A year later I returned to my job as an administrator in a job that I enjoyed and had been doing for over 15 years.

15 years ago I became a stay at home mum to my two dc. Not eveyone's cup of tea, I know but being a stay at home parent was the most joyful time of my life, I loved and cherished every minute.

10 years ago I became a PA for a disabled client - although it was sometimes a challenge as I struggle with some chronic health issues and was balancing it out with caring for my mum (who has dementia), it was also a job I very much enjoyed.

1 year ago the PA job came to an end as my client passed away. I took time out to look after my mum who is now in the advanced stages of her dementia journey. It has not been a great time and the stress has made all of my chronic health issues so much worse but being out of work for a year has meant money is now very tight and I need to pay off some debt. I need to work but it has been so difficult to find a job in my area.

I have been offered cleaning work from a close family member who runs a cleaning business. I start today. I am so sad that my life has come to this. I am not knocking being a cleaner and I am very grateful for the work. I will put on my mask (ie smile), I will work well as I am a hard worker and will just have to get on with it but it won't stop me feeling sad.

I feel this is my life now. I should have returned to administration work after having my children and worked my way up the ladder but my chronic health issues leave me exhausted at times and now in my 50's I have neither the funds to study for anything new nor the energy tbh.

How can I come to terms that I will never have a fulfilling and interesting job and this is my life from now on, cleaning houses for rich people.

Thank you everyone. You have helped me see things with a little more clarity this morning. I will go prepared with headphones and a few funny podcasts to listen to whilst I work.

Oh and just to clarify, when I say PA I mean healthcare personal assistant not an admin PA.

you can totally make jewellery in your spare time! Make Pinterest boards of what you like, do online classes etc without spending too much money. Silver sounds expensive but start with something more manageable?

I agree cleaning is a good job - improves people’s lives

Yes this! I loved my last cleaner (current one no but she keeps not showing up).

but, if it’s not what you want then use it as a stop gap rather than a forever job. And get a kit to make jewellery to sell on Etsy!

Right, I have rubber gloves and earpods in hand, I am out the door. I can do this lol!

Thanks all. Have a great day.

You absolutely can OP! Have a great day and come back and tell us how it went. Even if it’s crap you can tell us about the podcast you listened to (I need recommendations!)

Have a great day OP, FWIW I love my cleaner, the woman is wonderful and an absolute godsend, she greatly improves my life and I really value her. I can’t think of a single other person I encounter in a non-family/friendship scenario who makes such a difference to my life.

I agree that cleaning is one of the few jobs when you can actually see an immediate difference… I think that’s very satisfying! Most jobs you slog away for hours and rarely see anything change ( because it’s slow)

this job isn’t your ideal and that’s fine, but seek satisfaction in seeing the results! Best of luck

It's just a job, OP. It's what you do, not who you are.

Think how many times your life has changed, it will change again. You have proof of your work ethic and that stands you in good stead for making a change. People change jobs all the time.

As a wise puppet once said, it's only for now.

As others have said, cleaning can be satisfying. It is not stressful in terms of managing budgets or staff etc. You can just focus on the moment.

And once you have money coming in, you can look for something better. It doesn't have to be for ever.

I really enjoyed my time as a cleaner. No-one bothers you, I lost a load of weight through extra physical activity, and it is satisfying as others have said. It's far better than other jobs I've had like waitressing and working at McDonald's. Especially at the latter, some people treat you awfully!

Hi OP @MybosswasMrMcGee i understand the feeling. Been doing it at some point in my life too. I remember when one client was teaching me and showing me how to use the hoover (i am not british, but from well developed european country, he thought we use brooms at beast).

do it for the money and i am sure something better ir waiting round the corner. Wish you all the best

OP could you look at something like this???

https://jobs.opticianonline.net/job/1402245454/helpline-services-advisor-home-based-locum/?LinkSource=TopJob

The people who run the cleaning company that cleans our office are minted. Why don’t you look to progress your cleaning into your own business? Don’t people pay about £20 an hour for a cleaner? It can be so lucrative! You’ll have to use ingenuity and grit to make it work but that’s where it becomes a challenge. Alan Sugar didn’t say “woe is me I just work on a market stall”

Honestly I read your story and all I can see is someone who is so strong and resilient. Never feel shame about doing an honest job.

Excellent idea. I was turning people away every week and earning far more than I did in childcare

Similarly to others - we have a cleaner once a fortnight and I love her and her work makes my life so much better.

Also, might be worth having a think about your personal values and your life overall and where it is/isn't meeting them. For example regarding the silversmithing, it sounds like creativity might be a value that isn't being met (and doesn't need to be met as a job - 99.999% of silversmiths won't be able to use that as their primary job) and thinking about how to bring some creativity into life. Could your family and friends club together for a bday to get you a silversmithing course? Or perhaps you'd like to try another cheaper creative pursuit (the works does decent basic art materials for cheap) etc

Can’t agree enough. I’ve retired now and had to give up my fantastic cleaner. She really made a difference to not only my life but my family’s life as it freed up time for me to spend with them. My cleaner and her team take such pride in their work they send each other pics of the jobs they do in holiday lets as these can be left in a right mess and they love showing the turnaround they make.

I hope your first day goes well OP.
We've had periods of having a cleaner in the past, but have had to stop for now due to tighter finances. If and when things change though, I'll have them back immediately! There's no such thing as 'just a cleaner' - I used to feel so happy when I walked through the door on cleaning day, and everything looked and smelled so fresh. I really hope you're able to look back at the end of a job and feel a sense of pride and achievement, and remember that you're making those households happier today. Let us know how you get on.

I think you should take this for what it is, and when you are in people’s houses- promo yourself as an experienced home assistant. Something may come up by word of mouth.

Have you thought about registering yourself as a housekeeper with an agency? You have lots of experience, and the cleaning experience will help. i don’t know if there is much demand for this in your area. Or a mother’s helper?

my friend’s parent is a housekeeper at a stately home and loves her job. Very much a ‘cleaning for rich people’ situation- but she works in a brilliant setting, manages a few other staff and the pay is good. I know the family travels a lot and lets her use the pool and house when they are away!

and it isn’t too late to go back into admin.

It’s hard being a woman. I do hope you can see the value of all the things you have contributed to this world. I imagine you’ve brought those you have cared for and are caring for a great deal of comfort.

Cleaning is a physics and demanding job - how many hours will be doing?

Physical obviously not physics! Silly autocorrect

People these days offer virtual admin services, maybe that's something you could look into. It's self employed and generally working from home.

Just think of this as a temporary situation. I’m a sahm too, but made sure I have a lot of qualifications behind me and always check the market to see what’s available and what I need to update. You can get back into admin, just see what needs to be done and work toward that. It will be ok, just plan for something else.
it really infuriates me when I see young women today who haven’t done a thing for themselves and think raising kids is what you should aspire to. Educate yourself, make yourself financially independent, do something for yourself and then have a family.

Oh you are soooo important! ( One of those rich clients, not that rich really!) My cleaners are always hugely valued - even when they drop the ball after a while and get a bit lazy. I don't care because I have a bit of help and I value them so much. I know everything about their lives (and they do about mine) because I ask and I make sure they get bonuses and little perks. They probably hate me because I'm slovenly but I love them!! I'm so lucky and boy do I feel it. Look at the positive posts on here. Know the difference you are making to other people lives!