So dh has shhhhed my loud laugh a few times now, and I’m not sure about how I feel about this ?

[IsThishmmmmm]

Ok so I’ve been told I have a loud laugh by a couple of people now
but I’ve noticed now that dh if we are out somewhere and I laugh he will go shhh
he does it every quietly and sheepishly

but I don’t know what to make of it
I mean I can’t really control how loud I laugh

Multiple people have told you you have a loud laugh (translated - too loud and annoying laugh) so if you're at a restaurant or similar then yes, hush.

You must be my SIL. Of course you can control it.

Does he go round shushing other people? I bet not.

Are you one of these people that sound like a hyena when you laugh?

My friend laughs really loudly and it's very annoying and embarrassing. She can control it but for some reason she chooses not to. I'm with your husband on this, you should quieten down.

It’s obnoxious and attention seeking . Your dh’s reaction is quite tame .

Listen to or watch a recording of a comedy act with an audience. Often there is one woman (always a woman - sorry) who laughs louder and longer than anyone else and it is so annoying and attention seeking. I used to have a neighbour who would sit outside with friends cackling like this (just her not the friends), I had to close my windows to try and shut it out.

I’d shhh you. I wish more people with loud laughs had spouses who shushed them. Pipe down.

Have you tried to quieten your laugh? (If not, you should).

Of course you can control it if you want to enough.

Wow this thread is so British. it is really so terrible to laugh loudly?

I find one spouse shushing another to be incredibly belittling and disrespectful. If I was having dinner in a restaurant with this couple I’d find his behaviour far worse than hers.

There will be a lot of people who have heard loud talking or loud laughing and muttered “shut the fuck up”.

Really, a polite 'shhh' is worse than someone shreiking and cackling over everyone else trying to talk?

Loud laughs are fabulous if they are genuine. I’m married to a loud laugher. His mother though used to shh him when we were out. Op ignore him, it’s his hangup, why does it matter to him if you laugh?

people are odd about laughing, even more than shouting or talking loudly .

I’m introverted and definitely not attention seeking. I’m the type to hide in the corner in any social situation, but my laugh, when spontaneous, is pretty loud. I am perfectly capable of doing that polite laughing at stuff that’s only mildly amusing or not even remotely funny. But if something genuinely tickles me then I will laugh out loud. I’m not trying to annoy anyone. If DP shushed me, he’d be walking home as I’m the driver. If I hear someone suddenly laugh out loud, it makes me feel kind of happy. I might get irritated if I was sitting at the next table to them in a restaurant and they kept on doing it, but the odd loud laugh isn’t really going to hurt anyone. It’s a few seconds. Big deal. I get more annoyed at loud talkers because they’re usually the type that never know when to shut up.

Of course you can control it.

I'm quite sure you wouldn't burst into loud decibels of laughter in a church or a library.

I’m not British but yes I agree there is definitely a cultural context , although Europeans in general tend to be more low key than Americans for example .

I promise you I’m not laughing loudly on purpose. I cannot help it

Loud laughing can come across as fake and performative. This is what is causing his embarrassment. It's cringey. I don't know if a voice coach would be able to help you if you can't control it yourself?

I completely understand why you wanted to start laughing how you want to. Being told to shhh is annoying. I've got a naturally loud laugh too, and not for attention seeking, it's just how it is. These days though people are so fucking miserable that it seems like even laughing at a lower volume is offensive 🙄 I've had quite a few people telling me that my laugh has made them smile so keep laughing in your own way @Bippybop , don't let anyone make you feel shitty for it😁

Few things more annoying in a social environment than a person with a loud laugh. It’s just attention seeking and unnecessary. I’d be telling you to shush too. Embarrassing.

Train yourself to not do it.

Hear hear.
I’m a loud laugher and also very shy , self conscious and introverted a lot of the time. I can’t help the way I laugh, its spontaneous .

I'm so sad to read these responses. I hate to think that there’s some little Gollum in a dark corner whispering ‘shut the fuck up’ as suggested upthread.

loud laughing doesn’t mean maniacally laughing for hours, it’s just a reaction that happens.
i have been told by many people they love my laugh, now im wondering how many people detest it.
also im not fully British so maybe this is a cultural thing too?

I honestly do not do it as some sort of performance at all
i’m not a loud person
Don’t like being center of attention
like to just do my own thing

sometimes I will even cry with laughter
I literally cannot control it at all

I don’t sneeze loudly

and dh wouldnt dare say that to anyone else
He actually doesn’t even laugh that much say for example at a comedy show
he occasionally lets out what I’d call a begrudging laugh…

period I’ll start starting come on light up, we’re here for a laugh
and tell him to laugh louder
and relax

Jesus Christ! I have a big loud laugh, you lot are miserable bastards

I have a friend that laughs loudly at absolutely anything. If we go to see a comedian, I can guarantee she will laugh all the way through and at many points, she is the only one laughing. She laughs louder than anyone else, to the point other people will turn and look at her. She’ll also have tears running down her face.

I find it extremely embarrassing and unsophisticated.